I lost my ****
And you couldn't come
Its times like this
When my mind holds the gun

I hope your next one
Deals to you
This same hand
You delt me

You may not see my pain now
But you'll feel my suffering later
At the hand of the one
You'll never see it coming from

If only it was as easy
As trading glasses
To allow you to see all I do
Maybe then
You'd see how I love you

Let me start by saying you

do

not

deserve

her love.

Nor do you deserve

my

body.

But we give you both anyway,
She because she loves you,
and me,
because I love her.

You have to know
I'm letting you go

You weren't the one
But oh so much fun

I was sorry to tease you
And it never did please you

But oh well
After this spell

You wont even remember
My name

In the cold
My petals fall
The stem rips all it can from the ground
Soil seeking revenge
Gives nothing up
And eventually
the stem follows the dying tragedy

I wrote your name today
And I couldn't picture your face

I love you dearly
I truly do
But there is a darkness
In this heart of mine
It tells me
My love
Is not good enough

So yet,
I listen not to the voice
And give you all my love
However,
I will apologize
If it feels like I don't truly love you

Because you see
This love of mine
Is different from all the others

I want to love you
Will all of my being
So why do you insist
On making it so **** hard?

Swiftly,
Like the autumn breeze
You had no problem blowing me off

Every inch of your body calls to mine
Baby,
I'm just here to answer

I saw The End today
We didn't to out in glory
No, it wasn't swinging either.
We fizzled away
Through little red lines
Floods of salt water rained down
Showering me in humility
You in shame
Tearing flesh
Tore us away

I let me fingers trace every crack
Within those bricks
Through these man made walls
Just to get closer to you
Because I wanted to be closer to you

Seeing your hands steady now
Even as mine still shake
Painfully reminds me
That you would have the pulled the trigger
Without any second thoughts

Something I've learned
Over the years
Is never to rush nature
She knows what shes doing-
     Shes been doing it longer than anyone else
And the scars we force ourselves to have
Will always hurt more
Than the ones She will give to us
So never force a life lesson
You'll be naturally taught them
When She believes you're ready

I never thought you'd break my heart
I always figured I would
Be the one to hurt you
Considering my past and history

Maybe that's why I made excuses
Mainly for you
And tried to ignore it all
Because I was supposed to be the villain

Walking up
Sober and alone
Reminds me
That the bed
Isn't the only thing
Cold and empty

What happens when the stars cross
and your face isn't the one I see?

When the planets align
but you're not the one in their path?

What happens when, as you fall for me,
I fall away from you?

Anyone can put pen to paper and cause a smile
The difference is when
He put a pen to paper and made my heart sing

I'm not sure I know
How exactly this goes
Though God knows I try
Still you gave me the sky
You sat me on your throne
Making my heart your home
I beg you to live in my eyes
This way- I'd see my demise
Grant me this wish
Through the seal of a kiss
**** me ever so slow
To let your heart know
I was always the one

You are so much stronger than you believe
Look again at those mountains ahead
They're nothing more
Than the feathers to set you free

Genuinely healing
Instead of hiding
Feels so **** good
Why didn't anyone tell me this before

I fall apart
Drift away like ash in the breeze
With or without you
So why bother?

Being in such a tropical place
I see the beauty everywhere
Your laughing eyes in the flowers
That gleaming smile tucked away in rays of sun light
And you destructive personality in the heat killing my skin
Just as you did my heart

Once again
She sleeps with the monster she created
Knowing full well in the morning
He will have left with the moon
For what he feels for her
Is only what she wants to see in him

There is beauty in everything
Remembering
that beauty does not mean "good" or "lovely"
Beauty is "stunning" and "awe-inspiring"
Forest fires can be beautiful
so can your heart break
As long as you look deep enough for it

Today the little birdie screamed out and told me
I was worth saving
*We're all worth saving

I can hear them laughing
While drinking
And I resent them for it

Because I
Am only good at drinking alone

I'm sorry
For my temporary
And situational
Uncouth behavior
In response
To the change
You ****** me into

I couldn't
Easily accept
The coming days
Of loneliness

But in that time
I reflected
On your hurt
And mine

I now realize
You were right
Life without you
Is better
For both of us

Sorry that I am
The only one of us
Who can truly be rid
Of you

Enjoy forever
Void of me
Lost within
Yourself

You can wish for different circumstances
But you cannot will them into happening

Do I need you...



to be complete?

Your curse will be
Knowing that every time
You close your eyes you will see my crying face
And you will know
It was all your fault

What made her
so much better than me
that even in the end
the bitter moments before the storm
that you still chose her?

The water has a way
Of drowning out truths
I was told something this morning
you told me
all I wanted to hear
So you could wrestle me down
into your sheets
Your words were hollow
Just like your soul

After you solve this puzzle
Will you still be in love with the picture?

I want my words
To make your soul sing

So what would I have to say?

Love, do you even know
What you want to hear?

I would rip out your eyes
If it meant I never had to look deep into them
And trick myself back into falling in love
Looking so deep
I become a time traveler
Going to the times when we were perfect
Like all other travelers before me
I know I can't stay in the past

Dont speak
It'll keep you from chocking on the wrong words

I'll take your worries
and make them mine

How long can you pretend our dance is graceful?

Will the weight
Of my dying soul
Eventually drown yours out?

I'd fill the space between moments with you
If only to get you back

Can you feel me too,
As I think if you
all these miles away?

I'm jealous of the sun
every time she kisses your skin
You're awake every morning
to see her rise
She watches over you each
and every
day
And I wish
I could be her.

I seek out those
Who look like you
Because I want to find you
In everything

Knowing all too well
That those little similarities
Will never actually amount to all of you

Its always
The rainy season
In my heart
Whenever you leave

I could have been something
But your fire
had boiled me down to nothing

I'm drunk
But does that make me any less wise?

God it felt good today
To rip you off like a bandage
And toss you aside for good

Your laughter could bring love back
From all the broken hearts
but all it does
Is **** me slower