The thought of you consumes me
From the moment I wake up
Until the moment I go to sleep
You never leave my head
The memories of us
Laughing at the smallest things
How you’d hold me at night
Every little thing reminds me of you
You have consumed me whole
And I don’t think I’ll ever get out

i’d let you scream and yell at me if it meant hearing your voice
i’d let you punch and scratch me if it meant you touching me
i’d let you destroy me if it meant being near you

all i have left of you is clothes that smell faintly of you
and a letter you wrote me
god knows how much i’ve read it
i wish i could hear it in your voice
i wish i didn’t get like this over you
i wish i could stop feeling like this
i wish i could get over you
but i don’t know that i will
and i hate that
i hate it so much
i hate that i won’t see you again
or hear your voice
i hate that i did this
i wish we could go back to the beginning and start over

i haven’t cried this hard in a while
i hate that you have this effect on me
i wish and wish that i could get over this
but you have some sort of hold on me
and i want it to stop
i want it to stop so bad
i want to be able to be okay so bad
but it feels like i can’t be
i just feel a hole in my stomach and chest
and i don’t know how to fill it

you were in my dream last night
i was lying on your chest
arms wrapped around me
your head on mine
it felt so real
that i cried when i woke up and saw you weren’t there
i would die to feel your arms around me one more time