LJ Chaplin

LJ Chaplin Dec 2013

Don't spill your guts for those you thought you could trust,
There is so much deceit behind their lying eyes,
So much deception and cruelty behind their lips
As they whisper
You can trust me. I promise.
Broken promises are scattered on the floor
And I have stepped on the razor shards,
I caught myself in the bear-trap
And I'm stuck in this quick sand
of repetitive regret and resentment.
It seems inevitable that I will open myself
Up to people,
But it is their own fault that I have closed my doors to them.
Trust takes months to build and only seconds to destroy.

LJ Chaplin Nov 2013

Progress

When I write,
It isn't to document
Every inch of emotion
That spills from my soul,
To purge my despair
And dark thoughts
When they are dragging
The demons in my head
To the surface,
It is a story,
An intricate blueprint
Of each and every step I take in life.
I feel as if by writing from experience
It will allow me to grow as a human,
To ultimately become the person I desire
To be without the need to destroy my body,
I have attempted suicide,
Put a blade to my skin multiple times to find comfort,
Starved,
Purged,
Counted calories,
Found the strength to get help,
Take my medication,
Came out of the closet,
I found love,
I have learned to love and be loved
For who I am,
I have connected with another beautiful soul,
A guy so caring and kind,
I have applied for University and have been accepted,
I have so much more to unravel in this delicate yet complex
Cycle we call life.
I will continue to write every moment that happens,
Whether it is happiness,
Sadness,
Pain,
Desire,
Love,
Hate,
Depression,
Anything.
Then in the future when I look back on what i have written
I will truly see the flights and falls of my past,
The mountain peaks
And the darkest depths of the ocean,
I will see the progress I have made as I swim upstream
Towards my goal,
My dream,
My principal aspiration of becoming an interpreter for the United Nations,
I want to travel,
Be free,
Ride the winds to every continent
And be a part of so many extravagant cultures.

I want to live. I want to live it all to the bitter end,
**Scars, demons and all.

LJ Chaplin Nov 2013

Lyrics: Paradise

Verse One
Through the wind and the rain,
I will carry all your pain
And drag it to the bottom of the ocean,
Through the thunder and the wind
We will wash away our sins
And we will be pure like an angel tonight.
Take one more step,
No need to hold your breath

Chorus
Running up the mountain side,
We can always run 'cause we don't need to hide,
Chasing our tails through the darkened sky,
Tiptoe across the silver lining,
We won't fall we'll keep on flying,
Catch the stars and we'll be shining bright,
40,000 feet above paradise

Verse Two
Taking chances taking risks,
Because we have time for this,
Facing far too many dangers,
Taking bullets from their lips,
Breaking boundaries with our kiss,
Banish all the eyes of strangers,
Take one more fall,
Just hold on to your soul

Chorus
Running up the mountain side,
We can always run 'cause we don't need to hide,
Chasing our tails through the darkened sky,
Tiptoe across the silver lining,
We won't fall we'll keep on flying,
Catch the stars and we'll be shining bright,
40,000 feet above paradise.

Bridge
Vertigo and a fear for heights,
Running wild but we're scared for our lives,
Intoxicated by the stars tonight,
Falling 40,000 feet from paradise.

Chorus**
Running up the mountain side,
We can always run 'cause we don't need to hide,
Chasing our tails through the darkened sky,
Tiptoe across the silver lining,
We won't fall we'll keep on flying,
Catch the stars and we'll be shining bright,
40,000 feet above paradise.

LJ Chaplin Nov 2013

Seduced By The Devil

Hit the ground hard,
Rosary beads hit the dust,
Praying on your knees
That you have seen the last of us,
Heaven's gates are far from calling,
And your graces are still falling,
Repent and confess your darkest sins,
The Devil is coming, don't let him in,
Do not embrace his smouldering charm,
Or let him take you by the arm,
Or ****** your soul and accept his kiss,
That burns like acid and tastes like bliss,
Don't fall for his lust or burning desire,
Or for eternity you will be trapped within the fire.

LJ Chaplin Nov 2013

The Phoenix

These orange feathers wither
Beneath the scorching heat of the sun,
I am weak, dying,
Life slipping from my body
Until I am an empty shell,
A desolate carcass,
And finally I drown beneath the ashes
Of my own weakness.
But inside my lifeless heart
The embers are still smouldering
Until they breathe smoke into my veins
And I come alive,
Rising from the ashes,
The feathers aflame with radiant
And glorious beauty,
My wings spread wide
Like a sublime inferno.
I am captivated by my beauty,
Perplexed by my ferocity
And perfection.

LJ Chaplin Nov 2013

Wolves

I'm lost,
There is no sense of direction in the mist,
Clouded judgement,
No compass to point me North,
Sweaty palms,
Blindly wandering through the forest,
I feel their eyes on me,
I can feel the growls tearing from their stomachs,
Teeth bared and poised to ****,
They stalk me in the shadows of the oak trees,
The predators follow their prey,
Ghosts in the dark,

And all they have to do is pounce

All I can do is wait until they catch me

All they will do is tear me apart

But I suppose it's better than to be left in the wilderness of my existence

LJ Chaplin Nov 2013

Words

I'll take charge when I open my mouth,
Listen to my words as they all fall out,
Watch them take flight into the atmosphere,
They're better off in Space than being wasted down here,
I shout out loud until my lungs cave in,
You can hear my mind because the walls are too thin,
Screaming out my thoughts like a siren's cry,
Feast upon the verbal voices until my throat runs dry.
Silence ends in violence when you hold your tongue,
Battles aren't worth fighting if you're words aren't strong.