Chaotic syndromes
Unglued
My spiteful neurotic
Behaviors
Pretexts I never benefited from
Bullies on thee block
Reapers antagonized
Angels swarmed
And tried to protect
Protesting to no avail
It’s unreal
What you miss when
Your deep inside the flames
But when you finally
Claw your way out
And you escape
Certain spaces everything
Comes to light the forefront
Starts pacing around
The afterglow quickly shy’s away
And walks the other direction
Marked by a comatose
Frame of mind
Pull the plug
And let your feelings trample
You missed the mark not the first time
Balking at the fact
I knew I never fit in
Wandering along stumbling
Fumbled blueprints
It wasn’t my makers fault
The adults in the room
I point the finger at them
Rooted in more misdeeds
That I’ve lost count
Misread scriptures put the book down
Cavernous displays
Front and center
I should have been an after thought
As I plucked away the piranhas
One by one
Yet I became the black sheep anyway

Replicated
Never duplicated
Leaning forward
Tumbling
Twelve steps backwards
Backhand blues
Struck me again
Omitting me
From me
Etched in
Braille yet
Somehow I understand
My own language
The crowded streets
Forged in my head
I wish I could unplug them
Yet they are the reason
I create with such flawlessness
Shivers in the
Tiniest crevasses
I’ve come to grips
With my psyche
And the abilities to express
Myself differently
The plethora of ideas
That run at mach speed
Fire on all cylinders
I just try my
Best too keep them all at bay
Yet it can’t seem too
And create something anew
Stuck in a daze
My happiest place
The juices never stop flowing
Like a finger
Pulling the pin from
A hand grenade explosion
Writing seems to be
My only true coping mechanism
In every situation
It all feels so relatable
Despite the hectic frustrations
That run me over at times
You will never see another me
I’m far from imitation
It’s only me trying to find
My true meaning in life
Yet maybe I already have

My chronicles
Invaded my
Bloodstream
Divide and conquer
Trials and tribulations
Was it all worth it
Have any true merit  
Karmas a beast
Where’s my dogma
Rainbows in the sky
My complacent
Continuum
A momentary lapse
What I needed
To hear
The end
Only became thee beginning
At a loss for words
Sweet smells
Granted immunity
Balance and clarity
Behold holy water
Phosphorescence
Heavens gates at last
Everything before irrelevant
Maybe it was bad luck
Bad timing
Just not meant to be
Regardless of the circumstances
Painless and whole
I don’t hurt like it used to
Can’t feel anything but the harmony
Of this vast undiscovered universe
Carve
Me out a true home
Erase the dark
Where has my dark passenger
Gone too finally vanished
Free to roam as I please
When the fires
Put out completely
And the winds
Die down fail to swoop
My perfect moment
Has finally come to the forefront
I can’t hardly imagine it
But I’ve pictured it a thousand times
Over and over
Standing firmly before you
Knowing I’m finally exactly
Where I’m suppose to be
And truly belong

Freedom from myself
Saved by grace  
Enslaved in my head
This all feels so wrong
Waiting for the end to take me
Gazing upward
Who am I to say
Times up
Demoralizing horrors
Self hatred
Demons zeroed in
Hell came
In a hand basket
Today came and went
And I decided I’d rather
Not see tomorrow
Living in this body
My mind is just not doing me
Any good
I’ve been living on borrowed time
And now I wanna hand
In my voucher
I’m just so tired
And the fight in me is gone
I want peace and quiet
Nothing else
Face facts I should have
Been gone a long long time ago
Nothing has been more apparent
The here and now doesn’t mean much
Probably never has
Have I ever truly enjoyed life
I think I’ll take that
To thee grave with me
Mourning there after