…….
                  …….  


     …..

                                    ..


      ..


                                           .
And that’s all I have to say about that.

Why I gotta be
Left with regrets
Over things that are never gonna happen
Yet
Someday, some glorious day
It’ll happen
I bet
And this is how I pretend
I don’t have regrets

I feel you in the Wind
Cool……hot
Tickling my skin

In matters of the heart
One day
Can be
An eternity

Theatrics
Attract us
We love to see a show
Looked at from our lens
Over the crowd
The one we notice
Is flailing about

I heard he sang a good song, I heard he had a style
And so I came to see him, and listen for a while
And there he was, this young boy, stranger to my eyes
Strumming my pain with his fingers
Singing my life with his words
Killing me softly with his song
Killing me softly with his song
Telling my whole life with his words
Killing me softly with his song
I felt all flushed with fever, embarrassed by the crowd
I felt he'd found my letters and read each one out loud
I prayed that he would finish, but he just kept right on
Strumming my pain with his fingers
Singing my life with his words
Killing me softly with his song
Killing me softly with his song
Telling my whole life with his words
Killing me softly with his song

It was my fault
Really
I tried to blame you
For pretending not to see
But I should have known
Your disinterest was a “no”
I had every reason to go
Just like I do now
Yet here I am
With five encores
And twelve final bows
As a means of explanation
To nobody else but me
Trying to understand
Why I held on so pitifully
I must have gotten something from it
It healed something to some degree
I chained myself to a dream
And now I call myself free
But here I still stay
Tethered to thee

Disagreeing
The only clear way to not agree
But such an annoyance to do
Caught up in random crew
By accidentally
Forgetting to disagree
It’s an art
To do

I ain’t got any poems in me today
I been hooting and hollering
So much to say
Received by deaf ears
Although that is unclear
Maybe he’s listening
And pretending not to hear
From my vantage point
I’m standing over a cavern
Screaming out
Incessantly
And even my echo is ignoring me
Tomorrow, probably
I’ll feel less hopelessly
But today
I don’t particularly like being me
Put this out for all to see
And I’m starting to feel them laughing at me
Tomorrow, maybe
I’ll feel differently
I hope so
But that’s only
The pilot light I must burn
When I’m feeling dark
And lonely and fried
Hope is sometimes
The only thing upon which I can rely

Happy Sunday to my soul
Today I wish to grow
I hope to be
A better me
This I pray for
Everybody

This is the little bug
Named Krista
🐜
She’s pretty easy to ignore
She’s caught in a sea of billions of bugs
More now, than ever before
And sometimes she almost gets squashed
Under the heel of a boot
But ****, that little sucker
Sure does know to scoot
Blink and you miss her
That little bug
Self-preservation is her goal
She’d be so much better off
With more armor and less soul

I want to bring you discomfort
I want you to feel smothered by the cocoon
You have gotten so used to
It is there gagging you
The butterfly
Refusing to break through
Such is the curse
Of comfortable cocoons
Yet
It’s been so many moons
Your ideas
Breaking through
You simply cannot help it, Boo
That **** cocoon cannot hold you

Some people have a need to look down
It could be one of a hundred reasons
Every one of them true
But they got a skew in their view
They don’t even know you
The best thing to do
Is let them pump and postulate
Ego boost and self *******
Then you smile and say “have a nice day”
Thinking “thank goodness I can walk away”

You’re not not there
You got there long ago
But now your eyes have focused
Upon the horizon
There it is
Between you
And resistant distance
Not not achievable
You’re not trying to grow wings
But to grow your soul
Into undeniable
To even yourself
Evolve
Enhance
From “there.”
There is no rule
That one person cannot
Accomplish
Two impossible things
There is always
Not here

I read your poetry
And pretend to myself
You’re writing for me
In my imagination
You and I could be
Something incredible
Though unlikely
But isn’t that the way
Of all of the best love stories?
They come out of the blue
An unbelievable fantasy
That somehow comes true
That could be
You and me
And as I write this
I wonder if you’ll see
And pretend it’s for you
Which of course, it will be
And you’ll be sitting there
Thinking how it’s unlikely
But isn’t that how
Most truths start out to be?
The possibility
Of you and me
Unlikely fantasy

I look at the door
Hopefully
Every time
A shadow appears

Awaiting your entrance
Breathlessly
Your appearance is
A sunrise to me
A more beautiful sight
I never did see

In my wildest of dreams
You would acknowledge me
Today, especially
It could possibly be
It’s still early

Bit into the hook
Tugged on the line
Lots of times
Sitting out in the sea
Stuck on a hook
Fisherman!
Reel me in
And either set me free
Or eat me!

Clarity
A gift not often
Gladly received
Or given easily
I could write a poem about it
But I’m still stuck in the weeds

I can’t blame him for avoiding a potential train wreck
Or staying far out of it’s way
Uninvolvement completely
Why cross rattling tracks
When you weren’t even going that way?

You are a writer of beautiful
Vampire ****
I wouldn’t have previously thought
Vampire **** could be beautiful
But vampires are deep
And surprisingly subtle
Edgy yes
But also smooth
Who woulda thought
Vampires could be so **** cool

I don’t want to brag
Especially in the
Company
Of so many who are wonderful at poetry
But you can search far, wide, cold places,
And hot
And you won’t find a better muse
Than the one I got  
My poetry isn’t really good enough for him
He deserves Maya Angelou
Someone good enough to be known
So the entire world can see
Just how perfect a muse/poet team can be
That incredible human being
Who should be praised
Throughout history
Surely deserves a better poet than me

She was a demon
Full of sins
According to those who go by the book
But that witchy woman
Was a saint
To people who knew how to look

The weary soul on music
Is not so tired

This is me
Desperately
Writing him poetry
He will never see
Apparently
There’s no magic button
To set me free
From he
So I still write him poetry
Maybe foolishly
But not really
These poems are actually
Written for me

The pedestal is rusty
It lost it’s glisten shine
Busted down and termite-filled
How does it look so fine?

I cannot possibly be
The only one writing you poetry
You’re so **** inspiring
Beautiful too
Not much in this world
More poetic than you

C’mon Baby
Bring me there
You know where
On the journey from
Your mind
To mine
And maybe back again
Created with a pen
And then it takes me back
A thousand times again
Begging for attention
Never enough
There will ever be
You are like a drug to me

I’d like to say I remember you fondly
All you past boyfriends of mine
Some of you, I still think about
But
Most of you, I’ve forgotten by now
It’s not that you mean nothing to me
I’m sure I learned something from you
And if you learned anything from me
You’ll have forgotten me too

As far as comfort zones go
I fluctuate between gagging on a hot dog
Or a cool breeze
Sometimes very hot
Depending upon
Which air I got

It could have been
Spectacular
If you were just a little bit more
Everything
I see the potential
** hum, yet steady
I’ve never once seen
A sincere smile on your face
I need sincere smiles
You think I should have a better reason
I think I don’t need a reason
You simply just don’t take me there
And I have no desire to help you find it
When you pretend to know
Exactly where it is
Maybe you’re there
And I cannot recognize it
Maybe the fool is me
In any event
You and I are not meant to be

Everything to lose
Or everything to gain
The way things are now
You can’t complain
Why make a move
When you don’t have to?
So what’s this lovesick girl to do?
There’s no reason for you to come through
Blameless, beautiful, too good to be true
You
Maybe you feel you can’t measure up
To the vision I have of you
But isn’t that just another way
Of calling me a fool?
(And you know that isn’t true)
You definitely give me credit
You know I’m properly schooled
We could be cool
I know you feel it, Boo
Open the door
Let me walk through
Who knows where it goes?
Wherever that be
I feel that it’s something
You’d want to see
But maybe it ain’t
You can already tell
Or maybe a mix of the both
I promise you will not regret
Letting me get close
Plain and simple
I promise you will not regret
Letting me get close

Even more maddening than the hateful
**** talker
Is the one who feigns concern
Call up your family and friends
And then proceed to pretend
They’re just looking out for you
Over some made up thing
They claim you do
Spread the lie all around
To anyone who will hear
They’re so worried you’re going down
Not accepting they’re already there

There is nothing wrong with it
But it could be more right
With the right One
Right is rare
When it comes to romance
At least for me
I envy those who have it
It is what I yearn for
A partner
So rare
Yet people find their partners all the time
It is Magic I cannot control
Even when I blatantly try
I have my One
Out of reach
Shooting way beyond my station
I suspect someone will come along
Who captures my attention
Which, admittedly, is not a
Hott commodity
No one around is romancing me
Yet I am haughty enough to believe
My attention is priceless
The realest thing you can give to a person is
Attention
Priceless Attention

Cut off
Your loss

If I were to go away
Would you wish I’d stayed?
It doesn’t matter, anyway
I’d come back, anyday

Step one
From hundreds of miles away
Not even sure if I’ll get there someday

The swimming pool that’s only two feet deep
The alarm clock going off when you just fell asleep
The shower with only five minutes of hot water
Desperate for a son, but you get a daughter
The beautiful flower that smells like ****
The fly that just landed in your soup
The day at the beach when it starts to rain
Your beautiful white dress that just got a stain
A bunch of sand on your fingers with your nails still wet
Losing what you were positive was a sure bet
A scratch across your brand new glasses
A highway that doesn’t allow any passes
A baseball game with excessive delays
A guy who tells you he loves you and disappears for days
A fan that only blows hot air
Just sitting down someone takes your chair
A nice stack of pancakes
But you ran out of syrup
Meeting a cute guy just when you burp
Gum on the rug
No rain for your ark
An uninterested shrug
A day that is dark
A weekend you have to work overtime
When your pants won’t zip up and your shoes won’t shine
Boring as traffic when you went for a good time
Trying to keep up, but falling behind
Finding the bathroom you NEED, but with a long line
A date without any wine or dine
Just saying hello, and now saying goodbye
A **** disappointment
But everything’s fine
I’m heading over to the back of the line
I’ll catch you on the flip side
I can see what I would have had in store
I don’t have the confidence to be ignored
I’m also lacking patience too
But it was wonderful
While it lasted
Knowing you
Thank you for that
And I mean it
You beautiful, beautiful man

It all came so easy for you
There were no hoops you had to jump through
Now you sit atop that lofty post
Judging those who need understanding the most
You silly fool
You’ll pay your dues, too
Some day your payment will become due
And when that happens
We all know what you’ll do
You’ll act like a victim
And cry a lot, too
Claiming that you don’t deserve to be *******
And you will finally
Understand the blues

I listen to the wind
Talking to me
Tales of places it’s been
Cheeks flushed
Sails pushed in a clutch
Skirts hoisted unabashed
Jackets opened
Chests aflashed
Windy days artistry
Monet from the sea
Bringing life to the leaves

Begging wouldn’t help
But I would
If it would
I have gotten on my knees
Prayerful pleads
With only myself to see
Myself begging on my knees
I am proud of me
Usually
Even when I’m on my knees
And maybe
Especially

The circus comes to town
And sometimes right to you
No matter what you do
The circus will pass through
Relying upon it
Not smart to do
Unless you wanna let
The circus consume you

What’s to be gained from baring one’s soul
And then
Who will want to see it?
It’s a heavy task
Soul bearing unasked
A chore done in layers
And yet
A labor of love
When what is laid bare
Is unique and rare
Yet as common as
Dirt
Golden dirt

I just found a treasure
Still in the field
Playing in sunshine gentle rays
I could pick it up
However
Who is to say
The field might be where treasures
Wish to stay

I’m sorry lady
You’re so angry
That you cannot make me agree
Your imaginary
Take on the situation
Is how it really be
You are certainly free
To believe what you
Think you can see
But the mirage in your mind
Has nothing to do with me

"I see the stars in your eyes"
That's what you said to me
I just can't be impressed
With your uncreativity
I get you want to toss a line
Since we are far from shore
But I can't help but figure
You've used that line before

You carry your pain settled in your bones
I wish and pray you could let that **** go
Those demons
Are merely now almost conquered figments
You’re past it
You have almost won
Drop them
Set yourself free
That surely sounds like winning to me

Memories that I can’t erase
Of an imaginary happy place
You and I could be
If you’d only notice me

People will have something to say
However you do it, any way
If you stay quiet
Or have a lot to say
Whether you wake up late at night
Or early in the day
Whether you spectate
Or whether you play
Whether you’re straight
Or whether you’re gay
Whether you say
Yay or nay
Whether your an atheist
Or if you pray
Whether you’re black
Or white or gray
On your nerves
It’s gonna fray
If you bother with what
Other people say

My guy won’t be the type to ever say
“I’ll die for you.”  
He will say, “I’ll get us both through.”