Is this bleeding?
It may be
There’s lots of ****** poetry
At this time
I feel bleeding in me

I come to this well
Empty
White page
Refillleth me
A muse, or even God, maybe
Arrives here soon to meet me
Tells my soul
What I want this white page to know
And then
You see
The page tells me

I think it’s begun
But I’m not sure
Sometimes at start signs
The lighting is poor

He just can’t
His reasons are irrelevant
I plead and sycophant
But the guy just can’t
Or don’t want to
I try not to focus
On option two

I have underestimated my appeal
The connection that I thought was real
Imagining  something there
That he would be able to feel
As it turns out, he don’t care
Whatever is there
As true as it may be
Something is not something to him
It’s only something to me

It could be
I can only go explosively
Call you a geek
Make it mean
Call your momma a (obscene)
Say you’re a joke
You sucker fool
Foul, and too dumb to be out of school
Your music *****
And you never been cool
You fool
I could tell you I think you’re a coward
As yellow as they be
You’re not good enough for me
You freak
I could tell myself I want it this way
People lie to themselves everyday

I wish I knew
What you pay attention to
But you are free
To not let me see
Either way
There would be no change in me

As good as it is
Sometimes it aches
But that would happen
Anyway
Lies I use
To explain

In my wildest dreams
You go looking for my poetry
To find ones I’ve written
You haven’t seen
In my wildest dreams
You are a fan of me
Bigly
But you don’t want me to see
And that is the nightmare
To me

I wish I could know
If I should stay
Even though
I can’t  go

I would be the fool for you
But that is something
A smart person would do

You’ve made them seen
Your intentions
To which I agree
I won’t bug you to change your mind
You’ve already been too kind

The point is
There is no
Perfectly pointy point

It means
A lot to me
But not more than anything

I’ve already won
I’m farther than I thought I’d be
And still on my way
That feels
Like winning to me

I tried so hard for you
It’s something I’ll probably always do
Especially after I win
I’ll still try
Again and again

I wanna point to ya boy
Loyal and true
He really loves you
Lucky, you two
Good decisions, too

What’s the worst that could happen?
We could turn out to be a total dud
One of us could go for blood
Together us could be extremely not good
Disappointment
That’s the worst it could be
For me
Disappointment
For you
It could take you to the screws
If I’m not who I seem to be
Is anybody?
It’s probably
Smart of you
Not to gamble on me

I believe
There are some songs that belong to me
In your world
I aim to be
Your some song girl
Even after we
Have both left this world
There will still be some songs
More than a few
That once belonged to me and you
Whether or not you wanted them to

I’ll betcha he tastes like tangerine
Sweet and tangy and sometimes mean
Shelf life notoriously short
Sew a seed
Grow a tree
Just to taste that tangerine
Occasionally

I’m not trying to rush
Any of this
As you should be able to see
But at some point soon
Please start testing me

Thank you to whatever force it is that somehow prevented me from hitting “post,” on some stupid thing I was about to say

He’s my
New purple underwear date
He’s my
I’ll eat whatever he puts on my plate
He’s my
As long as it takes, it’s never too late
He’s my
Wouldn’t it be great?
He’s my
Infinite supply
Of words that rhyme with fate
He’s my
Elevate
The pulse rate
Contemplate
Set me straight
Invisible almost mate

I am the surprise onion ring in his French fries
Waiting to see
If he ever eats me

Maybe he’s hanging on every word
A lie I tell to me
He cannot make me see
A blind one pretending to see the absurd

I’m not sure
But I think it’s true
I never lost myself
While looking for you

One day
He’s gonna say
…….
……
…..
….
…
..
.
Something

It gets me nowhere
That’s true
But I still like
To think about you
It’s probably something
I’ll always do

Losing me
Might be easy
Over and done
Suddenly gone
Unexpectedly
My absence could even possibly
Go unnoticed completely
Can’t miss something
You don’t want to see
Yet here I be
Being as true as I can to me
Trying to silently shout
It’s both of us who are missing out!
Contending with your wall of doubt
Tried climbing over
Tried breaking through
I’ll probably even tunnel
If I thought it’d get me to you
I wish I knew
What to do

The Devil will show up citing scripture and pointing to all the people who belong in Hell.

You hit the jackpot with me
It’s not my fault that you can’t see
How valuable I be

Gilded cages
So pretty
Can make a person think they’re free

I stay here
Invisibly
Because you don’t want to see
And even worse for me
My dear
Is you also do not want to hear

Dear God
It’s me
As I’m sure you see
I know you know
Who I am
And who I am not
You must kinda like me
Judging by all these great things I’ve got
I started out this prayer
Intending to ask your facilitation
In getting the attention
Of the boy upon whom my heart is set
Try as I might, he hasn’t noticed me yet
You could do something about that, I bet
But my religion
Which worships you
Also worships our Mother, too
And she says it’s wrong
To influence someone else’s life
Without asking their point of view
So I cannot ask for him of you
I’ve tried everything I could do
Even talking to you
Maybe I make him smile sometimes
He could look forward to my presence
Silently
If he pays attention
He’s not telling me
Free I be
Choosing to be chained to he
And God, it’s getting me
Been trying so unabashedly
Something to prove
And he don’t want to see
I suppose that means I’m free
Whooopeeee
And if he doesn’t want to be my friend
Please help me to move on from  him
Amen

Maybe I have a sandpaper soul
Scratching pieces of you into dust
All while wishing you’d stay rough
And also the perfect smooth
You’ve already found your groove
For one who don’t want to know
There’s nothing to prove
I coulda been better
I coulda been best
But the proctor of the test
Keeps the door shut
Locked with a key
Forgot where it’s put
I send reminders daily
But you’re not even looking for me

I wish you would let me see
The part of you who wants to know me
And if that part of you don’t be
I wish you would set me free

What’s the worst that could be?
We could get naked together
And I have a stinky *****
You could make me laugh so hard that I
Actually ***
I could be in your presence
And **** silently
And it smells like the stinkiest cheese
And there’s no other person who it could possibly be
Because there is just you and me
We could shower together
And you jump out quickly
Because you have to ***
And I say, “sir, this situation calls for you to *** on me,”
And you say, “you’re gross, I disagree”
We could go to the beach
And you wear a thong bikini brief
I could find out the hard way you kick in your sleep
There’s lots of worsts that could be
I guess we’ll never see

One day I will choose
To quit you
But it won’t be some day soon
And I’ll probably keep saying that
Until one day I do

The magic is set
You should know
I cannot leave til you tell me to go
The onus is put on you
I’ll be around til you don’t want me to
Maybe a gift
Maybe a curse
Not sure which one of us
Has it worse
But how much bad does worse bring
To what is usually
A mostly good thing?
But I cannot see
From your vantage view
And it could be
Mostly bad for you
At this point
I assume
If you were forced to answer
You would say
I make no difference
Either way

There is no instruction booklet
No map to show which way to go
I could turn right or left
Where I want to be, I know
On the way I grow
I may never get there, though
There is high
I am low
In this empty sea
I row
With my heart in tow
I keep on rowing though
Somewhere unknown
I go

If I say “Amen”
Will the Universe listen then?
I have asked in every which way
Is “Amen” the magical word to say
In order to receive
That which I pray?
Would it be more sincere?
Open up The Holy’s  ear?
Appealing to God is selfish of me
I am not in dire need
God is surely too busy
To listen to me plead
For something I don’t need
When so many souls are going hungry
And every day I eat

I want to unbatten your hatches
I want to unhook all your latches
I want you to jump where you cannot see
I want you to land on me
I want you to write my name in *****
The next time you’re peeing outdoors
I want you to start keeping score
And find I’m not a settle, but a win
I want you to trust me to be all in
When you’re only a fifth of the way
I want to know you’ll get there someday
Would it matter to not know?
What would it change
If I knew all this trying was in vain?  
I’d probably still do things the same
Unless you told me to go away
Until that day
Here I stay
Jump you may
Someday

Maybe it could be
That you’re not meant for me
I remain unwilling to see
What you so clearly show to  me
Crazy glued to that maybe
Hoping to flip it into a probably
And spin it around
To definitely
Which sometimes maybes
Turn out to be

Burdened with desire
Burning like fire
Painful, partially
Beautifully
Sometimes it hurts
But it’s worth it to me
Feeling deeply
For someone worthy
Unchains the heart
Sets it free
One cannot be free
And live painlessly
Padded rooms are not for me
Pining for you
Recklessly
Uncontrolled blindness
To what it can’t be
Maybe
It’s both of us who cannot see

Seeds planted lovingly
Don’t always grow
Somehow didn’t get what it needs
What it was missing
We don’t always know
Tended to so lovingly
Still don’t grow
Love
Isn’t a necessity
For seeds
Unmeant to blossom
Not every start
Works magically
Dud seeds

Should I take it personally
Knowing that you
Don’t want to know me
You’ve got your reasons
Valid and real
I do not possess universal appeal
I can’t question your judgement
I think you’re great
Whether or not
You want me on your plate
I stand aside
Offering a bounty
From which you don’t want to feed
And for now
Alone I eat
Which has to be
Enough for me

I’m buried in red flags
Almost magically
Vivid to everyone else
Invisible to me

Give me a vibe, Boo
I thought you said that you were cool
Ain’t there some kinda rule?
That you gotta keep it real
If you wanna be cool
It’s not something you couldn’t do
Nothing ain’t something
And never could be
And I don’t see
Why you can’t give something to me

I am an ant in the room
Competing with the elephant
For notice
But as an ant
I should plainly see
I don’t want the elephant
To notice me

I can only take it personally
When someone don’t see
The cool in me
Upon which
Not everyone agrees