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Someone Jul 2015
What are you to do?

When your screams are not heard?

Your lungs burn.
Your head is pulsating.
You feel your vocal chords shredding.
It hurts to breathe or speak.
Tears streaming from your eyes and down your cheeks.

A cry for help.
As loud as you can make it.

They look at you.
They look into your big pooled eyes and say nothing.
Just stare.

Can they not see or hear the desperation in your eyes and voice?
Can they not see and hear how much you're hurting?
Can they not see and hear how you feel as if you're dying?

Or do they just choose not too see?
Just like they choose not to hear your screams.

No one can say you never tried to ask for help.
No one can say that you didn't try hard enough.

You lay there and feel helpless.
Like you're dying.

Years later you still have nightmares about it.
It still makes you cry.
Alone.

So what are you to do?

When your screams are not heard.
Someone Jul 2015
I couldn't sleep.

My breathing speeds up a bit.

My breathing gets faster and I feel... "blank."

My chest hurts.
I want to cry.
I don't even open my mouth.
I cant.
I realize what's happening an I try to calm down.
I do breathing exercises.
I think about if I should mention this to someone.
I feel nothing now.
They chest pains stopped.
The breathing is slowed.
I sit there as the voices continue.

One tear rolls down my cheek.

I think about how no one is next to me.
No one is with me when I need someone.
That's how it usually is.
I just keep a lot of it in.

Another tear rolls down my other cheek.

I just close my eyes and try to sleep again.
5:40am
  Jun 2015 Someone
Nicole Dawn
Always
Be
Careful
Don't
Ever
Fall from
Great
Heights
It
Just might
Kill you
Literally
Make
No mistakes
Only smile
Please, it's
Quite hard in
Reality but
So easy
To say
Usually people
Very quickly
Withdraw
X** marks the spot
You'll see, they'll soon just sleep
Zzzzz
This makes very little sense, but I'm confused right now, so..... The spot x is marking is the point at which you break
  Jun 2015 Someone
Dannie Marie
Look into my eyes
What is it that you see?
Do you see inside the pain within?
Can you hear my screams of loneliness
Crying for your soul as I claw at my mind?
The darkness inside, can't you notice
How it swallows me whole
Only to consume what little strength I have?
I'm crippling, I'm fading, I'm nothing.
Perhaps you do not see these pleas.
You only see my plastered smile
And hear my cheery, soft voice.
"Everything is great," I lied.
"I'm dying on the inside, help me." I hide.
Someone May 2015
I've had you since I was little.
I just didn't know you that well.
You hid in the background and hardly ever came to the light.
But you were there.

Now you have gained a friend.
You go hand and hand with each other.
You feed off of each other.
You are more present, but I still don't know exactly what you are.

I've started noticing you both more and more.
You create a tornado together.
Spinning with violent bursts.
Crashing things into each other inside of me.
It hurts.

I've let you consume me.
I feel hopeless.
I need to escape this.

I have a name to put to you now.
Anxiety.
And your friend.
Depression.

I've looked for help.
I heard that's the first step.
I'm pushing you down as best I can.

I at least have some hope now, and that's better than before.
  May 2015 Someone
Nicole Dawn
Am I okay?

I cry every night,
And can't breathe most days.

I sometimes want to die,
And feel buried by all the lies.

I have a broken heart,
And trust issues.

But also,

I smile at the little things,
And laugh for no reason.

I have hope in my heart,
And light in my eyes.

I am getting stronger,
And I will keep trying.

So:
Am I okay?
No.

Will I be okay?
**Yes
Just keep going
  May 2015 Someone
KD
Yes, I am a thinker
But it isn't always a blessing, because
my thoughts are like the sea: Keep pulling me down
I can't help but question every little thing
Sometimes I'm in need of air
Wanting to reach the surface
but I am not a good swimmer
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