It's such a sweet notion after all.
I have an ******* so I'm in love.
I'm jealous so I'm in love.
I'll die if you leave, I'm in love.
You are my breath and heartbeat.
I love love love love love you!

The weight of waiting increases
As every single year goes by
The amount of patience I carry
Is numbing me more inside

Let the storm pass, just be patient
As if I have all this time
In this world I watch it turn
As I keep waiting in my life

Just wait and see what happens
If you hold on to your belief
But I no longer have the patience
To wait until I am complete

When I see the signs and red lights
In the end will I be relieved?
From standing at the sidelines
Instead of addressing what I need

I no longer want to wait
For a better day to arrive
For all the perfect conditions
For a better chance to thrive

Or wait for someone else to give me
Their permission to be alive
To control my own life choices
And everything else I was deprived

My patience has become a trait
That has been engraved in stone
Watching opportunities leave
Only waiting for what is known

I want to let go of all this weight
That I had cultivated on my own
I chose to wait for too many years
Thinking it was a better way to go

I want to be unapologetic
Yet, I continue to apologize
For every difference that they see
Increases the need to compromise

From what I wear to how I sleep
Or what is deemed a healthy size
From then on, I understood
That I lived only to be described

I apologize again for my differences
Next time, I will improve my disguise
For the sake of your own comfort
I will keep putting aside mine

I look up to their condescending stares
They will never be satisfied
I escape into my solitude
I am not something for you to define

I am tired of advocating for myself
Without the support of family ties
Finding more hate in my own growth
As though I live to be ostracized

My attempts to calm my abnormalities
In order to sooth those who penalize
To make room for all of their expectations
To create another profitable merchandise

They have taught me to pursue
A personality so idealized
While they heavily persuade me
To carve a body to sexualize

Only to be rewarded with a life
Where I am only patronized
Filled with the inequalities
That are completely normalized

I retreat into my inner world
The place where I fanaticize
Of a space where I can breathe
With the encouragement to try

I am not broken, just discouraged
Of those who antagonize
Minorities and their differences
Who then live demoralized

I don't want to be given a role
With a life script to memorize
Or submit myself to a narrative
That can easily be summarized

Do not confide me to a label
Just so you can stigmatized
Those labels are not my name
I deserved to be recognized

I do not wish to be put on a pedestal
As another icon to be advertised
I only wish for your understanding
Just enough to be humanized