Remember when you'd hug me goodbye and the words 'I love you' escaped my mouth like my body knew you meant more than I would ever let myself know. Remember when I wrapped myself up in smoke like I wrapped myself up in everyone's goodbyes because holding on to something, even when it kills you, is easier than letting go. Remember when you pulled me in closer and every will of my being screamed to push you away and keep walking, but every tiny nerve craved your hands around my waist and the temptation to stay when it's all so wrong is too much. In all reality's I'm just too scared of the 'what ifs' that'll haunt my head once we're through because if we tried long enough we could be more than something great. Remember the way my lips moved and the way my fingers ran down your neck as if every muscle in my body needed you to know, wanted you to know, that I love you more than I could let my voice admit.

I want to stare into your eyes
Until I go blind...

Blinded by the light
That is love.

A love so deep
I can never reach the end with my feet...

Atlas, I want to kiss your lips
Everywhere you go, you take my scent...

Feel these words to see what my heart meant...

I turn the silvery nozzle,
Let the water fill the tub,
Slowly slipping in,
Letting the steam rise above

They say a hot bath cures all,
It relieves stress and pain,
As it washes over those who are tired, drained,

My physique is feeling fine,
But lately it's my mind that's been aching,
Doubts and frustrations,
Sweet apparitions that bear no fruits,
Fill my brain like a silencing mute

Sinking in, I let the bubbles sway and pop,
The refreshing dampness takes its course,
I try to relax and close my eyes,
While both the heat and darkness arise

But I struggle and cannot remain still,
As the gallons pour,
I reopen my eyes and realize,
That no amount of physical remedies,
Will ever take these thoughts of you away

No matter to which waters I may seek,
The sultry seas of the Mediterranean,
Or the holy healing powers of the Lourdes,
It presents no issue,
For there is no cure to wash astray,
Images of my dear in these upcoming days

“You will get broken,
You will be bruised,
You will get burned,
You will be bitter,
You will forget how to breathe,
You will burn things,
You will bruise grounds,
You will break people,
You will breathe what you have forgotten,
You will be bitter,
You will be weak,
You will be weak,
You will be weak,
You will build up again,
You will bury the broken bones,
You will brush the bruises away,
You will breathe,
You will get better.

To be honest I just want my fingertips to be familiar with your bare skin. I want to see you naked 3 AM and remember that I have you forever. I want my eyes to be on a first name basis with every inch of your body. I want the taste of your body to be imbedded in my memory

Every time that I see you forced to take a deep breath. I have to try and regulate my heartbeat. When I see you you an inaudible wow always escapes my lips. That’s how amazing you are to me. So amazing that every time that I’m graced with your presence I accidentally let my awe of you escape me

Hey look, it's the new English *****

I didn't dare look up
The same words for 2 weeks now
I only just transferred here
And already I had a nickname

I hate it

Eyes stared at me during class
Words exchanged about me
Not the kindest ones either
I was different... an outsider

Why didn't I get a nicer class..?

I was bullied
Alone
No one even referred to me by name
Just because I was from elsewhere and rumours travel fast

I hated my life... everything and everyone.

I was crying in the bathroom after school
Locked the door as tears streamed down my face
My thoughts finally got to me
I started to believe what they said

No no no no no...

I walked out wiping my eyes
No one was at school anymore
Except maybe a few teachers here and there
"Hey..."

I'm shocked... no one was supposed to be here

A boy stands in front of me
Asian, looked exhausted and he wore glasses. He smiles.
I vaguely remember him from class
He sat by the window in the back

No... please don't hurt me...

"Amber right?"
I'm confused. "Yeah... Amber [---]."
"Amber [---]... mind if I tell you something?"
"Not really... what?"

I wipe my eyes and wait for him to speak

"Don't cry alone here.
I know it's rough...
But nothing they say is true.
Besides, I find the British to be awesome."

I stare at him, dumbfounded.

"Um... Thank you..."
"Hey, no prob. It's late... you should get going."
Another smile.
"I'll walk with you if you want."

I feel really warm inside. And before I realise it, I'm smiling too*

"I'd like that."