Brianna

Brianna Mar 2015

You said I was pretty -- in a not so average kind of way.
You said I shined-- but not as bright as the sun.

You said a lot of things I can't quite get out of my head.
You meant a lot of things... I can't quite pin which one meant the most.

But you are like coffee- bitter and somewhat sweet when I add a little sugar.
You are you... And I'm still learning to accept this.

#love #hate #pain #sadness #whatever #alone #coffee #sunshine #bitter #forever

Brianna Feb 2015

Ruined friendships.

I wanted to be there when your mind stopped wandering and you remembers who your real friends were.
I wanted to trust that you would come back to me because this is how things worked.
But love and family and friends only go so far these days.
Betrayal and lack of honesty is what will come out to play.
I wanted to see you remember that there was a time you were happy but I was wrong.,
Because even though he broke your heart you ran back every time.
And like a worn our recording of your favorite song... The record skipped a few beats so I could sing on.
You were my best friend and now your just dust in the wind.
I hope a boy was worth the end of a friendship.

#love #life #stupid #relationships #friend #best #boys #family #sisters #ruined

Brianna Jan 2015

Dive bars

At 1 am, he tasted like cigarettes and was over 6'3 in all black.
I didn't know his name & I didn't care.

At 2 am, he gave me ****** beer and held my waist and taught me how to kiss.
His eyes held secrets, I'm sure, I didn't want to know. And his smile said I'll -****-you-up in a **** kinda way.

At 3 am, he was ready for more and I craved another touch, another kiss from this bad boy at the bar.
Drunk off who knew what and this overwhelming urge of lust.

At 4 am, i had bruises on my arms and lipstick across my face left in a ***** bathroom with no shirt.
He tasted like cigarettes and I wanted to puke.

#drunk #alcohol #lost #boy #bad #cigarettes #lipstick #morning #early #bars

Brianna Jan 2015

One of those days

One day I'll wake up with happiness in my stomach instead of worrying what the day will bring me.
One day I'll wake up not paranoid and terrified that you'll try to ruin my life again... Or that I'll let you do it.

One day I'll find the strength to tell a cute boy I think he's cute and not worry if he will tell me how disgusting I am.
One day I'll be able to look into a mirror without crying myself to sleep or thinking of every part of my body j want to cut off.

One day... I won't write such terribly sad poetry.

#sadness #happiness #cute #thinking #day #one #ugly #pretend #wishful #disgusting

Brianna Jan 2015

Simply drunk again

Staying awake under terrifying night skies filled with endless ways to wonder (wander?)

Drinking ****** *** and cokes until I pass out in this dive bar down the road from your house, maybe I'll become one With the stars.

I like the simple things, nature, the ocean... Well, but those are not simple things at all.

Driving through crowded city streets just to find some peace of mind and end up screaming at some guy who cut me off.

I liked the simple things in life, you, and me, us? Well... Those were Never simple things.

So tonight, I'm moving on from *** to *****. I'm praying to porcelain gods hoping I wake up to my head not spinning and my stomach trying to ****** me from within.

I'm clearly drunk again. Simple things were never my strong suite.

#drunk #alcohol #loser #lost #nature #wander #wonder #simple #terrifying

Brianna Jan 2015

Maybe one day?

I'm hoping one day we walk down the same street, maybe not at the same time but together nonetheless.
I hope you feel what I felt that day.
I hope you see what I saw that day.

Wind blowing in your hair, trees swaying so high above... Magic surrounding us.

One day, I'm hoping we meet again. I hope it's under new circumstances and new lives ahead of us; our past so far behind us.
I hope you know what i knew then.
I hope you remember what I said then.

Shy smiles, distant eyes... Beauty and serene wonder surrounding us.

I'm hoping for the one day the world lets us finally be together. If that day never comes, then I hope the world will only let me remember the good, and no longer the day you gave up.

#love #memories #happiness #perfect #remember #wander #wonder #list #distant #serene

Brianna Jan 2015

Bright green eyes

I wanted your bright green eyes.
I wanted them right when you woke up; when they were still foggy from last nights dreams.

I wanted them when you fell in love; not with me, but with your passions.

I wanted them when you were angry... When you stared at me hard and cold knowing I couldn't dare stare back.

I wanted them when you looked at yourself in the mirror, never seeing what I saw in you.

I wanted them mostly when you told me you loved me... Because they got sad and compassionate...

And I wanted them when you told me you always thought about me, but that it wasn't going to work out.

I wanted your bright green eyes.

#love #sad #hate #eyes #alone #always #green #you #bright #missyou