I move in life like a bumbling bee,
a lost tumbleweed.
Tripping and stalling at my choices like a fool.
All the while I'm watching you.
You're gliding effortlessly like them all.
Facedown on the ground, I see you as I crawl.
Close to the earth, I can feel your path,
jetting and dotting, forward and back.
We move in life like bumbling bees,
lost tumbleweeds.
Smearing and smudging our footprints of reality.

What beautiful minds you both have,
filled with love and science.
Spilling, but you don't laugh?!
I want to listen to you read.
Read, read our ancient poetry,
I see you booted and laced in tweed.
Now, Let me read one more page of your mystery thesis
Then off to bed,
So I can rip it to pieces.

Rose-tinted is too delicate,
this was more a blizzard,
fake snow blurring everything real.
all I could do was feel.
How cold and empty it was
but to me, it was like Christmas
What could this be?
Do you belong to me?
It's all thawed out now
and it's ever so bleak
to think I believed you could ever,
ever.. like me?
oh Anna, please!
You and love will never be.

If I seem silly to you,
Its because every time I see you I'm suddenly reminded you exist in the real world too.
Dreams waking up and walking into a room of realness is enough to make anyone feel silly.

I feel uprooted,
Screaming like the snakes of medusa
too much oxygen, then not enough
The soil of life disappearing beneath me
I cannot breathe! I've been tossed.
If God wanted Roses,
I must be a dandelion.

last night I wished to die,
in the morning I ate like a queen,
dying makes you hungry.
Life feels dreamy
I keep on sleeping,
slowly fading
you won't hear me go.

One day unfortunately soon
you'll be gone.
and I can't accept it yet but you will be.
You will be nowhere and everywhere, sat on the seat in my mind but not really there or here.
You won't be touchable or audible
You won't laugh or cry or drink
you will just be a thought, a memory, a blur
and my god I don't want to lose you to a blur!
like I lost grandad
a coffin, a hand, a fleeting memory
you'll be gone
and there's just too much of you to be gone
I hope I loved you enough
Goodnight forever.