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BarelyABard Nov 2012
A drop of water in an evaporating vial of water are you, a piano key that lays untouched and piled with dust. I touch a stone and I feel it’s presence, but form altered and frayed.

If I close my eyes, does the world disappear or does it live in another realm completely? A phantom I might be, a shadow in something that never has existed in the first place. A hand on the dream of a clock, constantly being wound and turned.

Eternally ticking.

I see a million eyes, we look at each other for a moment but only a moment. We see what we want, and if we don’t, we try to change the world to better our view of it. Our view is but a shallow thought. The loose ends of our subconscious, reaching, trying to branch out into a dream-like state.

I am never sure whether I truly wake up when my eyes open or close.

Gaunt faces are the same as lively ones. Smiles are the same as frowns. The ghosts tap their feet in rhythm to a slow beat. They dance into circles while the radio tells them what to do, what to say, how to feel. Projections on the side of the cave resonate in them and they follow. I follow…

I dance with them and I know that the dance will obliterate everything that might be real. I tap my feet.

Tomorrow was yesterday and today never happened. I am the man in the background of your thoughts, holding the mirror above his head. I am a thought, the mediocre absence of everything that we should have been. Close your eyes and you will see the void, you will see yourself. You exist to feel the void with half spoken words and broken promises.

A drop of water.
tread Jan 2013
Panic attacks are like deathless suicides
****.

You're deader than a dead man because unnatural fasts
unnatural- fasts
solipsist dizz-
solipsist sip, mizz?
burn the boardwalk and walk the beach *** all of a sudden
life is too short to fuckit, later.

everything has to slither out like Satanic snakes offering the half-bitten apple
to Adam *** he got the other bit stuck in his Adams Apple and suddenly lost his voice,
** **, take that, prophecies of God!

Too tired to be the  metaphysical rebel licking the slug slime off your toes as if you deserve the luxury,
smile again and I'll call you the prettiest pervert to ever strip down to your socks.

this is what a broad mind is,
I write this assuming weirder thoughts have flickered in your ******* lightbulb.
Roman Nov 2020
You're ugly from an angle
You don't reflect enough
Your choices are so loud
Yet they still lack any sound
I'm not so Ptolemaic
You're not a Galilean
I'm not at all judgmental
I am honest. Maybe humble
You're weak below the knees
You're smug and overweight
You don't respect advice based on the mouth from which it came
I'm walking alongside you
I choose to be so close
It might be most absurd but know I love you more than most
touka Sep 2018
in mid-augusts breadth
the last gasps of doomed stars

like lions lacking breath

he is watching
as history repeats itself;
damns itself

the solipsist; the progeny
who cries under his mother's wing

the exodist
to exist
unfortunately, in shortage of sleep

where asphodels crouch
long cut from life's thicket
free from time's gouge
painless, from the thick of it

cast into tartaros
on the cape of ouranos

to fall from his ipseity
so long was serendipity

his father's testament;
the panegyric on death

his debt, his deficit
of what he is bereft

summer feet cross the border
to touch the winter sleet in its corner

and skin meets skin
the solipsist's gravest sin;
the sophist, where he sits,
sips on the blood of collision

more sure of "self"
than his mothers hands

the solipsist, to exist
in the shade of earth,
who inhibits
a pull, a push
×
leaves his soul above the room
Beleif Jul 2014
Orion
Part II


Beyond my view of comprehension;
The questions of mine,
The eye of the jigsaw.
Above the stars of three demensions;
The blade of a saw,
Man surrounded by awe.
Magical wires
They move as they think.
The People of Grand
May scatter like lead and ink.
The Monsters of Earth
Run away, I won't seek.
For I have not seen the stars of Orion.
softcomponent Jan 2014
as fast as I may be able to carry my legs is never fast enough to escape myself.

I sit alone in my presence and cough a frozen lung back to life. glazed in phlegm.

95% percent of my friends have vacated the city for the winter holidays and seem to be having fantastic experiences wherever the **** and back again. I sit alone at my computer and whine to you in stream-of-conscious prose because I would otherwise be fighting sobs between coughing fits upon the floral patterning of my single-layer blanket draped across a queen-sized mattress planted straight upon the floor (as if I'm Japanese or something).

it feels like the antidepressant I'm on nullifies most highs to a point and I have just discovered a nullification of the runners high is included. Returning after a 20 minute lap, I hate myself even more than I did when I left in a narcissistic daze to look for an outcome as opposed to petting the parking lot with my eyes like a painting by a French renaissance artist I can't pronounce the name of. Everything I've done is a joke in trapped mind-states like this. Everything I've done haunts me like old sweaters I no longer wear but keep piled-- lonely nostalgia's-- like empty memories of ex-girlfriends and slow, lonely mornings in elementary school underneath that old oak tree where the only company you preferred was your own to the point that teachers began to call in your parents to address it as if it were anymore of an issue than the fact that others had to constantly surround themselves with friends and noise and dead-end conversation---

after pushing writing aside to skype my almost-girlfriend from her home in Florida (away for Christmas break like the rest of 'em) I am still vacillating between sadness-of-the-mind and happiness-of-the-absurd. I begin to doubt if there is anything that resembles sadness-of-the-absurd and happiness-of-the-mind. I was short on rent by $35 this month-- both because I am paid minimum wage and because I spent too much on beer to forget the fact that I may lose even this job that pays minimum wage, seeing as I was nothing but a tool to be employed for the season of Christs birth. Two other seasonal employees have already been informed that they're most definitely staying on after the seasonal contract expires, while the rest of us wait in a quagmire of corporate vanity and pistol whipping until Sunday for word on our own outcomes. As much as I love books, this is still a stronghold of the New York stock exchange, and nothing more. I am used insofar as I am useful.

I keep falling back into my solipsist anxiety of old, and it's usually via the catalyst of my own design: 3 to 5 cups of coffee and the resulting overdose on cortisol. It's like I depersonalize for a little while and fear I may very well lose my mind. Everything becomes a hazy game of 'holding it together' by a string of floss and I inhabit a dream world I know very well is the real world and yet I am still unsure as to where the line has been drawn. I try to let go and lose myself in it-- try to hark back into remembrance all those Buddhist proverbs about having to 'go out of my mind' to 'find it.' Often, my tinnitus lets off a signature trauma bleeeeeeeeepppppp as if I were a shell-shocked survivor in the first scene from Saving Private Ryan. I know I look tired.. I decide to keep the rings under my eyes quite visible so perhaps the world will finally notice that I am exhausted and sick of its ****. It never listens. It just passes me like homeless people and waits for me to die.

The *****, ugly truth is that, next week, I might be jobless.

The *****, ugly truth is that I am no good at playing a character in a TV show I don't even want to watch. I want to change the channel, but I can't find the ******* remote.

The Apple logo sticks to the screen as I reboot my iPhone. Everything costs far too much, as if money were no object. This brings me to a counter-cultural stream of thought, which is typical of me and my abhorrent ramblings.. money is nothing but an object, but we treat it as some self-imposed objective truth and forget that it is nothing more than an agreed and shared subjectivity.. like the rest of our 'objective' measurements and pursuits of knowledge. I hate money, and it's true that one reason is because I don't really have it, but I would (and have) hated it even when it is in my possession like some gift that's a curse and some curse that's a gift but it's mostly just a curse, because we're all too petty to stop keeping score. We can't trust our particular cups to the ocean for fear of losing a dime.
excerpt- - 'the mystic hat of esquimalt'
Hannah Wallace Jan 2014
My mind is racing again
At 4:37 am
I wish my grades were as heightened
As my inability to sleep

I’ve been having nightmares
But they don’t scare me anymore
Sometimes
I find a comfort in knowing
That the monsters I’ve dreamt
Are a lot more pleasant than the monsters
I have left to dream

I don’t mind it
But I mind you
Only because you’re always on my
Mind

I pretend that I’m a solipsist ,
But I could have just made it up
Your love wasn't as real in my heart
(As it was in my head)

I am a shy little flower
Somewhere behind the trees
“There’s really no way to reach me”
But there is.
No one has taken the time to
Explore

I once met a girl
A traveler in that moment
She told me a story about her grandmother
Who was shipped to a boarding school in Germany right after WWII.
At the age of three
The first sentence she ever understood was:

"Everything is broken"

And she lived a whole life
With that silly little thought
Echoing.

Someday
I will find an ocean breeze
Worth calling my home
With sand as soft
As my tinder
Beating heart

Good night
Is a formulation of words
Whose meaning I am still
Unfamiliar with

As I walked along
Your art stricken walls
I wonder if I’ve ever really been capable
Of creating

But hardly ever do I strike an inspiration
I can call entirely my own
Jeremy Duff Feb 2015
And so I'll like your selfie,
and I may send you an encouraging message.

Digitalized and marginalized
you exist upon a screen.
To me and my solipsist mind,
all that is real is all that is before me.

All that is after me is fiction,
something I, and millions of other poets may attempt to write,
but realness is lost.

It can be compared to trying to relay a first hand experience to another,
it is impossible to do completely.
I can tell you that the trees swayed nonchalantly and that the water was crisp and welcoming but you will never know what it was like to be on the lake that day.

If Jesus Christ himself were to tell me change my ways...

Put the music on repeat,
put the *** in the pipe,
pull the covers over your chest,
put your tongue inside my mouth,
and wake up,
I will do the same.

The thought of you,
the idea of you,
the digital image of you and everything you've said to me excite different parts of my body.
All these things excite my mind.
Your words excite the blood vessels in my cheeks and your body excites my groin.
I drink a tall glass of water,
I ******* thinking of you,
and I fall asleep hoping to dream of you.

I dream of you putting your tongue in my mouth.
My body excites in my slumber,
and though I only kiss you in my dreams,
I ******* in my shower.

I'm a mountain man dreaming of the desert,
and you're a Midwest girl dreaming of the ocean.

I want to feel your legs around my neck,
your hands held in mine,
and your tongue in my mouth and around my ****.

I want this of her and her and him and her and you but I cannot have it.
So I've masturbated 3 times today and if the son of God told me to change my ways I might need to ******* twice, thrice more.
did you buy all of this on credit
and can you do without
going to ceremonies for awhile
look what higher learning
and empty rituals have given you
a distrust for humanity
and all that's truly valuable
are you a nihilist or a solipsist
what a life to be so twisted
like an elliptical esophagus
so strange the way we spell things
what would we do without
spellcheck or a dictionary these days
is a thesaurus a dinosaur or a literary device
the swelling went down
right in time for your dialectical revival
while didactic strange attractors are strangely repellent
selective attackers leave your marriages despondent
disparaged orthodontists leave fluids on your face
still you wipe your chin with sandpaper
and leave greasy finger stains in their place
fluoride is a bargain complete with its own argument
and quite often batteries are not included
but that doesn’t mean you’ll never use them
for what's a *** toy to do
if its lacking its adjacent latex compartments
or if you're really just not in the mood
i guess this human body will have to do
grooving to the music is all about our choosing to
becoming outdated or faded like a tax evader
these equations are meaningless
when you are fermented with libations
if you drink more amber liquid would you be negated
relevant for a moment and then
just as quickly discarded as a piece of paper
the receipts we diligently saved
are just as well used to light your fireplaces
Nhlanhla Moment Mar 2014
You all pass me by as though I am invisible
I am the **** of the Earth and you see no dignity in me
No one knows my story, no one knows of the pain in my eyes
I have seen some really disturbing things
When it was all too much, I just decided to become a solipsist
I dreamt everything out of existence,
I became the only reality

All else just felt and seemed unreal,
I stepped out of a program…
I see you law abiding denizens; wrapped up in your safe and controlled lives
I watch upon the thrill you revel in when lost in consumer behavior
I will tell you a story of cannibalism,
Long ago when the serpents fled into caverns, there were offshoots of half-human/half-serpent, the serpents were the starving peoples of the community
   For most tribes received energy from swimming in the oceans and listening to the sunset and eating vegetation and berries in the forests

So the serpents mutinied, manipulated the tribes to start worshiping the Sun and fearing the Seas
So soon enough they controlled the supply of food and cutting of trees…
In this way the tribes would have to answer to them and this is how the tribes became slaves to the serpent-man offshoots
This story is of cannibalism; yes --- the tribes became food for the serpents, not in a physical sense but rather the energy field in which man was trapped
Was so low that brother would slay brother and members of the family stole from each other.
****** spread, it became a lawless   society but it was a perfect harvest for the human farmers, for this negative energy was their food. In time pyramids would be built and technology exchanged,
Soon advanced civilizations developed and the human farming would take on different forms

There would be malls, money and skyscrapers to furnish a material aesthetic farm. The slaves or food of old would become consumers (consumers-or-the consumed) who would be esteemed
With occupations and certain chosen members, who were once priests, sorcerers would then evolve to be experts and politicians. This herd would then look to them for guidance…
So man build homes, has good credit, belongs to a religion, has a flamboyant social life and is basically kept entertained. So souls would incarnate only to be mined, every generation protecting and perpetuating the scripts of old bestowed upon man by the supercilious tyrants. This would, in the corporate world, mean appreciating clients.

But I am just a hobo on the streets, you wouldn't when you’re trapped in a square couch, watching a little box called television, secured in a huge box called a house.
I feel the rain, I shine with the sun, I freeze with the cold, I see people come and go. I have learned it all, now I wait for the saucer people to come and get me to take me home….
But for now I am a hobo on the streets, (sigh) all alone.
tread Aug 2013
Up and down; a trend in life that continues to death and potentially thereafter.

My life has been a mesh of many strange moments, days, minutes, and hours... I have yet to completely shake the solipsist angst I coyly developed following the summer after my graduation from high school. Sometimes, I really do half-expect the world to cave into some psychedelic stop-motion I can't escape from, capable of only gazing in fear and realizing that I'm trapped inside the matrix.

Love, too, has assisted in bringing me a sense of release.. but it has also conversely caused lows to become lower as I now have more to lose (in a romantic context). My head buzzes with strange information and gazes at others content with a twinge of jealousy at times. There is a way out of this; I've seen it done before.  But what alchemical combination can save a battered soul who can't be sure what the ultimate cause of the suffering is? It feels like a great part of it is my fault.. but the problem is how does one go about ceasing a toxic cycle in its tracks? Someone declaring, 'simply do this!' has only ever made it worse. But could that be a form of resistance on my part? Some lack of faith in myself or in the universe? How does one go about simply 'doing this'?
Rob Rutledge Nov 2023
It's a slippery *****,
I hope you know.
Said the Solipsist
To The Fly.

Who was itself
A somewhat suspicious
Deliciously conspicuous,
Most likely maleficent,
Manifestation of a mind.

A specimen meant just to define,
A shade that shall not live,
A shadow that shall not fly.
Designed to be a metaphor,
To make its point and then to die.

Invested only to be digested
By imagination and an eye.
Where within it lingers lonely,
Solely stoic for a while,
For a time.
A casualty of entropy
Out of place,
Left behind.
Or maybe out in front,
Depending on your point of view,
However long thought takes to stew.

The Fly nodded sagely,
Behaved as if it knew.
Nonchalant with confidence,
The epitome of cool.
Giving all the right impressions
These digressions were understood.
As it landed ever closer
To sit upon the madman's shoulder
To show this silly, pseudo ******
How little he really knew.

That being said,
If all that is lives only in your head.
Could I trouble you for some of that stew?
Reece Apr 2015
Your Instagram tinted daydream solo self-help projects
are naught compared to the many faces of my Ketamine addled
multi-faceted bed-ridden wasted ****** aesthetic
Bring me my poppers while I can smell them
or get off my ******* rocket ship
These are the bed sores of regret
tinged in tingly jingle-jangle garage rock twattish twee twaddle
Smoke my tea drink my plants, Kratom of the smack recovery
cat come cat-call **** all to be done
the ladders lead to the plateau that the Meat Puppets sang about
Some say I've been away, some that I've been dead
dada said daddy in the monotone voice, slippin' mickeys and mandys in the drinks of the boys and girls for spoils of war
and causalities of the political system
I hope the vote for your preferred pederast is enough to stop *******
or in fact let us turn to your queen so the monarchs can reward the patriarchs that beat the matriarchs and maybe we can sleep a little better tonight
Truth is these four walls are enough of a prison within the prison that I feel free in slavery
Words too imprison the soul, so I stopped using them
implicit in silence
explicit in message
call on your horses
kneel before the great *** of democracy
these are truly the end of days
and her natural milk shall flow through our veins
until the new dawn awakens from solemn slumber
and your faux-intellectual ******* returns to witch doctor ritual seance ******* matador squeaky clean record having gutter-troll reprobate sunshine easy listening solipsist elite country club golf retreat in the hills where you **** the carcass of the empire with your dysfunctioning penises and praise your zionist overlords that mock your ****** hospitality through gritted teeth as they push you over the edge onto the wailing crowds of peasants below where your alien bones crumble to dust and your stagnant coagulated blood oozes into the Earth where it burns like gallons of acidic chemicals and the world rejoices at the sight of fallen greed and toppled regime until the next time it happens again
There is no meaning in these words, don't read them, don't worry, stop caring
Olivia Kent Nov 2013
Anonymous!

Tell me what's her name my friend.
The one who stole your heart away.
Noisy siren, snatched your beautiful heart.
Entrapped in words ideal.
She powered by a pen.
Ignited by war my child.

Sometimes fired from summer sun.
Winter rain.
Hailstones biting.
Causing pain.
Sometimes cruel and vile.
Human love discarded.
Dumped on the pile

Words strung on a harpsichord score.
Lost love has a date with destiny.
Destiny wholly untrue.
Two anonymous writers.
Write day and night.
Sort of seeking recognition.

Potential footsteps lead to perdition.
Hope and pray not.
Their only prey is words.
My soliloquy she cries in solitude.
Solipsist by choice.
In her sophistication!
By ladylivvi1

© 2013 ladylivvi1 (All rights reserved)
tread Mar 2013
occasionally, a flash of white page blankets her face like a pale Swedish summer
the video stream clunks along on solipsist angles, falling, waking, back, here here
pen on her tongue and I wonder where it's been, disease travels funny highways but the constant revelation of
one germ after another makes the body a well-protected warzone, immunity flaunts its immunity,
the pen picker probably protects the person a bit more aptly than the hand-sanitized middle-man afraid of the swine flu

blue blanket holds her shoulders like she's swimming in a lake of silly putty and her white teeth glisten because
she's lucky and no one ever notices their fortune when it's so close you can't see it.

turn around,
have you found it yet?
dorian green Feb 2021
anything is possible. i don't mean this in a good way.

will you look at me while i'm talking?
not like that.
i know you are.
i want you to see me. i want you to keep up.

i could go completely ******* crazy.
i could never speak to any of my friends ever again.
i could join a fundamentalist christian cult.
i could drop out of college.
i could look into the mirror and see my own eyes reflected back to me, or gouge them out to be free of the burden. i could do anything, but it's all a matter of actualization.

you have to know what you're looking for
before you go out to find it.
the story the eyes try to sell you is always leaving something out.
you want this to be easy. you want the mirror to have a purpose.
don't we all?
you want to know what you want, but we are all stumbling blindly through this desert.
alone despite being inches from one another.
i'll try not to get too cocky,
because the only difference between you and me
is concept, language;
life is a whole other beast to cage.

don't get too hung up on definitions.
definitions are for law. this is poetry.
this is me building a mirror just to break it.
it's funny, how that always turns out.
realized desires are boring.
we get what we want
and we break it.
every mirror shatters in the end
and we all die a solipsist,
wanting and narcissistic.
softcomponent Mar 2014
I sat on Facebook in the forest,
birds tweet and retweet.

I check my email again,
birds tweet and retweet.

there's an empty to-go cup
lying in the ditch next to the trail

DOI CHANG emblazoned across
its tubular length, ethically traded
subtitled below.

I whip out my camera, the world around me
solipsist phantasmagoria; the shutter closes
and I don't believe I exist until I see the
photo
Reece Apr 2013
The words are cement that stick to my tongue and the roof of my mouth
Molasses is the apathy that oozes from every pore of my beaten body[1]
I watched a man enter the bus, the same time, everyday, his wife waited
Today she was not there
His ring too, was gone[2]

I grow tired of writing, as I grew tired of speaking years previous
Semantic satiation of my everyday life
and I lost the will to live

There is no form, or rhythm
A shame considering the beauty of language[3]

She sits and stares through the wan window and wonders[4]

I avoid eye contact, physical contact
I refuse to acknowledge your existence
Solipsist *******[5]

What does it feel like to **** a man?
It hurts.[6]
[1] For seventy four days the solemn man sat silent
Protesting the entitled youth and their incongruence
The poverty In Mali made him cry anguished tears
and the moon was watching

[2]Taller than I, with a wry smile and slicked back hair
James Dean was envious as our hero shed the jacket
and the hefty boots were now clouds as God arrived

[3]The English dictionary is a Burroughs novel for the ages
Run it through the shredder
and begin again

[4]Blonde haired princess, tied so tightly and I can smell the nicotine
Is my reflection handsome, or as hideous as the truth
Please look through me, I'm transparent
Transcendent I failed to be

[5]I apologise, family, colleagues, people of the street

[6][THIS HAS BEEN REDACTED]
Michael Cassio Jul 2015
Body

What are you? Are you mine? Or that visual image of one solipsist?

I often wonder of that ****** sense. I shall believe for now -

But

One and their life experience shall determine my opinion on this most gentle subject.

I do not mean to offend. You see, I do not mean to offend. But I have to.

Word.
Inspired by one trip to Biarritz.

— The End —