I am not social
I am scarse
I dont need to show up
If my heart does not ask

I am not available
I am not a farce
I dont need attention
Atleast not by the vast

I say i dont care
I say it, again.
Again and again
Till it feels like a mask

No need to follow
No need to like
I can grow, i can flow
I can be a social dislike

My talent is mine
It's whispers are mine
For me, for me
For me is the rhym.

You can leave me
You can, you can
Leave me you can
But i still love the best i can

I love the best i can.

at first things were great with my mom and my dad
she should have stayed best she could have had.,
most would call it shallow to leave be on  your own,
not some tantrom all around disaster
day by day a year matured faster
I was only nine helping mamma cross the line,
child support goes for my stepbrothers fine.
maybe when he was my age he belonged in a love cage,. 10 His own mind rage,.
but sneakin out at night for some hood fight !  back to 21 remember  that he died right.
only one who cried long my heart syed a new song,
never understood. cant we just get along?
yea you say a bad kid, as a parent not helpin had did..
with learning had hid,
hurting words created
    thats why my brother deflated...
mom I was good kid seain what was right never under stood you'd rather quit or split
You know I was you're hero you made me just some zero...
once was indepenent then boom the mind flent,
now your'e just insane controlled by cliffs chain,
but you know that I dipped along the way I tripped
one thing that I fell, atleast I'm out my shell
led out on the train achieved my life regain,


sorry that I hit him,
your hubby just was  cruel
as a lil Rhym he through me in the tubby
hit me with his bottles called me fat and chubby
beaming red eyes screaming  all night crys,
all on my own,
brother helped when I got thrown.      

even at four got pushed to the floor.... by the way just more to say
Once i hit twelve I ran for he door
Thid bad man for the rest of her life
she said yes to be his wife,
with his big ring knee on the floor
I just think 'Ding hells at the door...
      moms the baby inside screams save me

  plus her dad got out the knife he was crazy her whole life
by time i Got to ten my mind was in a den,.
every day was yelling,
      just be soft and sweet by telling,
I know you are just scared And once you really cared.
with your so called man,
the one with no life planned
  You see I left the road called far west
with out your'e hand I just want the best,
one day mom you wont see me
one day mom you'll be at rest..
cause that mess left bullets in your'e chest :'( </3

Arrywillbeloved2013© copy right protected

I can see now the injury..
The tear which ripped through a soul..
The irresistable gravitational force it has..
An internal super nova, made blackhole..

See the bandit who robs children?
Of their fantasy world of "safe"..
Their image of a benevolent universe..
Hallowed by a hole deep in inner space..

Time folds there as it captures..
Pain too emense to fit in inside..
Frozen solid for later feeling..
Moments from which we all hide..

Layers and piles of "protection"..
From hurts too bitter to taste..
Too cutting and raw in the knowing..
Too "gone" for time to waste..

Some more "protected" than others..
With their egos and illusion of control..
These are the ones most troubled..
Their false lives have swallowed them whole..

Now see the ones who show their pain?
Their layers suspended in time?
Perhaps some pulled to look inward..
Through the love of music, art, or rhym..

And others finally forced by fate's will..
To surrender their powerless pieces..
Emptied of excess, their souls cry out..
"I am Startdust; I am that which never ceases"..

F* my style
I don't
Have to
Rhym

Maybe I'm back there
Doing my time

In this room
Called attitude
You work me
Like a dime

I ain't gotta
Make money move
Just living
A hell of
A ride

Lawr-nc- Hall
[email protected]  
https://hellopoetry.com/lawrence-hall/
poeticdrivel.blogspot.com

                   Can W- Writ- Anything Without th- L-tt-r –?

                                   Irritabl- Vow-l Syndrom-

Th-y say that-nglish is a difficult languag-
I wouldn’t know; it’s th- only on- I know
-nglish, that is, and it’s a lif—long study
But that’s okay; it k--ps m- out of the b--r joints

In -nglish w- hav- only six or so vow-ls –
A, -, I, O, U, Y, and that vagu- “ih” sound
Which m-ans that rhym- is a chall-g- in tim-
Though “How now, brown cow?” works out okay

That is, if on- wants to gr--t a cow at all
I s-ldom do, but how about you?

Baat
Speak?
Aryan tu bol nhi skta gadhe
Bol skta hu!
bolta bahut hu jab sochta nhi
Sochta hu bolta nhi?

Bolne ki adat lagi toh hai chhut nhi rhi
Par bina spche kuch bhi bolu?
People say aryan be yourself
Kahaniyo ki tarah

Abey yar ek toh poetry nhi horhi mujhse
Maine socha rhym krunga shabdkosh ke 4-5 shabd fek fek kr
padhne wale ko chaka chond
Thik hai padho tum koi nhi

Hanji toh baat aise hai ki baat nhi hoti mujhse
Baatein nhi kr paata mai
Mai bol nhi paata
Fir wahi baat ?

Keyboard chal rhe mere
Ye mere thoughts
Tum jaante mujhe meri awaz me pdhoo
Ab aajka din itna ajeeb maano maaanoooo

Acha tumne wo chakki wali kahani suni hai?
Abey wahiii chakki chakki aata nikal
Chakki chakki sona nikal
Acha shyd tumne nhi pdhi **
Chhoro

Apun kaise describe kre
Mujhe likhna tha bass bass likhna tha
Chlo seties wise ajka din demn
Demn

Ek toh nakab utaru pehle
Nakab? Kuch nhi bhul jao
Nakab se yad aaya kitne nakab?
Anginat? Har insaan ke liye naya nakab
Demn

Wapis topic par
Series wise heh
Abey nahi ulti seriesss

Baaaaat

Ek toh shabd khatam hojate bhaii
Kasam se aryan tuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu

Ek insaan ego?
Dusra insaan ego?
Tisra insaan ego?
Itni ego har insaan me ek ego
Ya shyd wo ego nhi par apne aap ko sahi manna no?
Shayad har koi apne aap ko sahi manta

Saarey apni jagah sahi hai
Shayad mai bhi apni jagah sahi
Par as a third person mai galat
Mai bacha dimag?

Ladaiyan horhi
Ladaiyan kyu horhi?
MAnjao na bas ki ye cheeze aaj se 6 mahine baad
jab hum sath nhi honge tab yad aayengi
Ki kash us wakt boldiya hota
Kash us wakt ladai khatam kr li hoti
Baat kr liya hota

Baaaaat
Dekha aagya na mai

Acha ruko
Han

Toh regrets
Regrets? baat kar liya hota
Kisike intension nhi kisi ko bura bolna
ye kisi ke sath bura krna
Lekin shyd abhi dono ek dusre se gussa
Dono ka apna ego wo pehle baat kre ya woh

Bichme ek dalal jo jiske pass bhi beth rha
dono ko smjhane me laga hua
Par dono paksh apni apni jagah sahi
Par dono samne se baat nhi krna chahte

Iska kissa yaha khtm
mujhe isoe poetry krni h topic likh leta imma write
Firr firr wese series ulti chal rhi

Par abhi mai face wash krrha tha
Ab face wash ka jo mera MEDICATED SOAP hai
wo washroom me gir gya
sidhe jameen

Boys washroom ki halat aisi
upr se ye hona
Ab kya hoskta hai?

Mera phone jiska abhi abhi mene screen guard change kraya
Wo bhi jameen par
Foota pada
Iski mummy ki buri aatma

Apun chhoro dusri baat krta

Cabinettttttttttttttt

He says in his books
One who seeks shall find and knock the doors and it will open
I wished
I wished alot

Goal? Nothing
socialising shyd a new friend a new person
A new special person or special person is again a materialistic thing
that aryan loves and if he describes?
Abey jao
Describe
Camera ki baat krrha tha
Acha chhoro

Cabinet ?
You dont get what you want
Par aryan tu toh keh rha tha seek and you will find
Betey galat hu mai
Waha likha hai you shall find
Not you will

Ab beta woh har cheez jo tujhe chahiye agr mill gyi tohhhh ?????

Acha apun abhi nhi likhega itna chhoro


Gods plan?
May be he has another plans for me
Shayad abhi jo bhi bura hota mere sath i say the same
Chahe wo meri selection ya dosto ke sath bahar na jaa paana?

Dosto ke sath bahar na jaana paana?
Wahi baat aajati hai
Baat hi toh nhi hoti mujhse
Ab mai kaise bolu ki mujhe conjuring dekhni hai par kiske sath?
Koaise bolu mujhe enjioooooo jaana par kiske saath

Plans thodi na pata horhe kisiko
Portray bhi toh aise kiya jaata
Third wheeling krrha inka kuch hone nhi derha?
Aur aryan chup hai?
Aryan kyu nhi bolrha kuch

shayad dar rha
Ki agr kuch bola log kya sochenge
Dekha bache tu toh keh rha tha ki tujhe farak nhi pdta duniya kya kehti h?

Are demn dis is me walking to the washroom
and i see da same personsssssssss-s
Arey seksi

Han toh nhi iksha meri jaana tumahre sath
Nhi iksha meri dekhni movie kisi auron
Auron nahi dost ** tum mere
But agr tum ek sceneriooo kreate krlo dimag me
ki us wakt ye horha **
Aur ab tumhe pata chle ki wo nhi hoga
Bas man utar gya

Par nah chahte hue bhi tujhe han bolna pada aryan kyuuuu????
Baaat baat nhi ki gyi tujhse
Bola nhi gya tujhse
ki mai nhi hu third wheel ksiika
Mai nhi ban rha kisi ke ***** ki baadha

Teen log saath chal padein toh kya woh trio nahi keh sakte?
Kya dosti sirf do logo mein simat jaati hai?
Kya har jaga ek ladka-ladki ka hi equation hona zaruri hai… aur unka alag se jaana hamesha kuch aur matlab rakhta hai

Shayad mujhe wo vibe pasand
Mujhe lag rhi hai cheezein pyaari
Mujhe aarha hai maja?

Fir wahi line aagyi na jo kahi padhi thi?
One says
Stops
Kya thi beyyyy
Bhul gya
Kuch toh tha
One stops da odar continues?

Na chahte hue bhi control horha hu mai
Kyui
Kyunki logo ko lag rha ki ye badha ban rha kisi ke *****
Arey bhai tumhe kaise bataun maiii
What 3 dost feeel
Tum toh wahi third person hogye

Par kya koi nhi
Mai ek toh maine abhi dekha
Baat kya mai toh likh bhi thik se nhi paa rha

Are chillll aryann bhul ja
Yaad tu paani bharne ja rha tha
And you got this strange vibe
Comming towards you
Attracting aryan?

Mai shaktiuon ki baat kyu krta hu
Shyad kuch
Acha chhoro

Han toh ye jo khichawat pan thi
Woh mujhe khichti khichti ek room par legyi
I saw a simmilar face
who had tears in his eyes
Lying on his bed
Staring at the wall

Nothingness
Nothingness
Staring

What did aryan said to him?
Kya hua ——-
Replies
5 saal ******

Dekho wot was i thinking dat time was
Mai phle se sed
Mai phle se dukhi in sab cheezon se
Mai apna dukh baatne gya
Mai apni baat bolne gya
Par maine bola kya

Baat?
Baat boli mene
Ki bhul jao jo hua
Puri life padi hai?
Bhul jao tumhara past
Take the next step
Go with the flow
Maybe god has some another plan

Ye maine kisi aur ko bola?
Abey aryan beti?
Tu khud toh padh tune kya bola use
Par wahi hai
Aryan se toh baat nhi hoti?

Abey
Sochta kam hu maii
Baadmein cheeze yad aati kya hui
Ab isme aryan kya kare
Aryan kyuuu kyuuu
Abey kya bolu rukoo

Ek toh tum pdho ye pura
toh tumhe smjh na aaye kya horha
par jo bhi horha
demn demn