In the New Forest my Base had discovered
The Rites of Pannage those Back-Breakers do
Sows and their Cousins their Instinct recovered
Took a Year's Break from Storage and Stew
Which Proud Members chose Estovers on-edge
Then for Dessert from their Month's Turbary
A Better Concern than Motors bred at-stake,
A chance for their King to pay his Duty
So, my Conqueror, tell me that Ballad
Or must I force that Verderer to Sing
With Acorns, Truffles and all Nuts at-hand
Till he spits out the Seed which bore my Ring.
Tell you what. This Porker you just provide
I'll relish its Pudding and wear its Hide.

Byron wants me to invite all my friends on HP to a pig roast. Rest assured, when Byron has a pig roast fun is surely to be expected. Here's his invitation.

You're invited to my pig roast.

I told him he'd have to do better, that he's talking to a collection of rhymers, wordsmiths, and gesticulating anthropomorphics. He had no idea what the **** I just said, but he did do an edit.

Here's his edit.

You're Invited to My Pig Roast

Your toad on the road
Only squats, never stands,
Or sits 'til he splits
Between the treads of your van.

Your mouse in the house,
If it isn't found out,
Drops pellets in pots,
'Til snap, then it stops.

Your bird on the wire
Sweetly sings then lets fire;
And a cat in a hat
Is cute, but that's that.

Your horse from the stable
Won't be served from your table;
And the deer by the brook,
Well, too much the Bambi to cook.

Yes a bear in the wood
Indeed craps where it should;
He's best left alone
While your meat's on your bone.

Then there is the PIG.
A ruddy pink porker,
Intelligent and clean,
An innocuous oinker.
It does nothing that's heinous,
And yes, it should shame us,
As it lies silently smiling
With a spit up its ****.

Please bring your own lawnchair, *****,  and women.
The pig's on me.

valley mountains high,
cattle there to serve us,
rugged men are men,
sheep are very nervous,

megan's dentures in a jar,
pug face snoring porker,
drove llambo to his wellies,
the mountain mutton stalker.

valley commandos camouflage dress,
headband, wellies, wooly string vest,
llambo llewellyn up to the test,
heads for the hills searching his quest.

english may laugh,
and label us sinners,
while we **** sheep,
they eat them for dinners.

"Surreal skeptic, cynical cryptic! Licentious lecheries fabulist façade fantasias. Wild eyed spectral serene. Dream of catenary concoctions, ethereal salacious conjugation, bridge the gap in metaphysical mystique. Erotica erectile errantry’s exserted protuberance is a kinesiology kleptomaniac with his embark embargo extraditions and his eventuation evocative execrations, a positive amalgamated anathema android of a terminus thrall. The shadow in the shade of the silhouette sojourn. The bailiff’s rakeness rails incarnate, unicorn railway nails and all. He will paint mirador bartizan panorama tableaus all over your proximity parameter perimeter peripherals. Force the enmity to acquiesce into impunity.” “Why this is not but an ogling ogre of an oligarchy omelet” she shrieked as he continued to tickle her. “Down here at the bizarre bazaar we all believe in the blasphemous farcical fugueness,” he said. “Positive orchestration renditions of transpositional interlude.” “Come here,” she said “let my clambering clamorous clangor write you a wield wile treatise expose’.  The legions of Chinga da are battling the hoards of Gunga din saying", "kinetic supremacy temporize tractive fluent" , "it’s sheer genocide. That plasty goop nosed porker of a Gumby ******* ***** monger Gunga doesn’t stand a chance. Coax cacophony clout, catatonic phonics, grizzly grotto grouches all”, She squealed. “Now you’re gumption dreaming”, he chimed. “Chutzpah panache spontaneous generation complicity, gambit alluvium aloof succor.”

I thought I was doing so well
and lost so much weight
and hell I felt pretty
and I put on that dress
that ugly blue dress
and I thought I looked okay
and was proud to look okay
in that ugly blue sparkly dress,
but then she took pictures
and showed me the result
and I nearly broke down crying at the horrific sight.
Hiding my tears, I finally realized
no amount of dolling up
and no amount of weight loss
is going to make me pretty.
I'm ******* ugly
and a nasty little swine
a fat porker pig
a mole on the earth's pretty face
coal that can't become a diamond
a face to make goblins laugh
I'm ******* ugly
and that's all I'll ever be.

Tending a field of sinsemilla
With a bluebird cardinal chorus
A happ- happy guitar picking sun
above us  
A singing stream ,
Mr. Porker in his overalls ,
Mr. Goat in his denim jeans
A blue heron at the well
Whistling Sunflowers covering the Port dale
Purple bud in a basket , cool earth
'neath bare feet , Randy Rooster working
the hashish , chickadees crooning in the
tickled trees* ...

The Entire Egyptian Military laid down ( there's that word lay laid) their arms of weapons designed for war, when the opposing armies, had revealed they had strapped Living Cats to their shields.

Why, you wonder? Well the Cat is one mighty fine refined focal point, hell even its waste is refined and a rarity in quality of Ammonia and is closest to the Pig um, and Humans, and Pig is for only one rather jacked up reason, and the biggest reason you might want to no longer consume Pork, um, did you know that before the flood, that wiped out the entire map, with its dark wters and buildings, rocks, wait.. lets try this... see it is not the water that kills and destroys the coastline by wave or hurricane, it is the debris of all that is previously knocked into absolute helpless submission by the water of loving rage and passion. see imagine the entire map, being in a washing machine for oh, lets say 30, no no, oh hell lets call it at 40 days. and with all that debris, cars, trucks, trains, um people, roofing wood, beams, what.. im sorry, what was that? what do I mean cars trucks, trains? um, well we didnt abuse the oil as we do now, remember do not harm the oil or the wine? but we abused other elements and resonations, and had oh , far more than we do now, well, I say that in the understanding of the average bear. cause we have it all jack, yep most the vaults have been found and are now fully, well for the most part reverse engineered, um once time , and vibration, speed and stable speed of, vibe, ummm. yeah, never mind, we had some cool **** you cant even begin to imagine, and we had genetic manipulations too, and you know how it is when we have done it all, we keep going, and so we get the platypus, um and even the half human genome pig. not boar, not Hog Pig hair less pink porker pig, jack, yep, human genome. so stop eating of it. and if you think that not a good enough reason, research the worms that live beyond 800 degrees 12 hours in the meat of the flesh of the beast. and you for life. and yes I didn't know and eat and found out by seeking and stopped. oh and research the glands in their legs that excrete.

Pete and Pauline Porker
Speaking through their snorkles
Double-chinned, wet-lipped
Checking out Facebook fibs
Snarled, yellow,
Tinted-teeth
Buys fudgie-bars
And potpourri
Their greasy-mouths
Spew forth and give
Fountain sodas
of commercial spit.

john porker was a friendly man who was being tortured by voices of his youth

like his mates would say, trying to be a young dude, when he was trying to live his life

and his father was a very strict person who wanted him to be an adult at the age of 8

john hated it, but the young dudes also wanted john to be an adult as well, and if he doesn’t

they will come and bash him up, john said, you just try and bash me up, if you do, you’ll be fucken toast

tomorrow morning, the young dudes said ok, but be careful or we’ll bash you.

this made the porters very angry, which made them want to wrap john up in cotton wool, which john hated

john went through his life going through stage after stage, which forced him to break the cotton wool and

attempt to argue with or bash his parents, saying he can look after himself and his father said, we are doing

this cause we love you, john, john threw his fist at his parents saying i can look after myself, really i can

and then told his dad we better stay away from you, for you are an aids carrier and this made mrs parker

very very concerned for her family’s well being, saying oh no, our special little guy is having a few problems

we must help him, and his father said, let him help himself, he thinks we hate him, and john said leave me alone

i really do hate you protecting me because i can look after myself, mr parker said, you are a fool john, you really are such a fool

and john told mr parker to *******, mr parker slapped john across his face saying, john, you are a flaming fool

and then john got up and brought his father to the garage and banged the door on his fathers head, and his father said

be careful, you realty hurt your daddy, john ran up to his room and slammed the door very hard and his father followed

him and when he got to the door, he knocked on the door very hard, but john said, go away you great big old fogie

and mr parker went for a walk to escape this whole mess john is putting on him, and all the outside hooligans said to john

your father is like us, now man, you’re not, so stay in your room, you see mr parker got home in 1 hour and john started

up again, and was sent to his room, what are the parkers going to do with john, dunno mate!, these fights happened every

time mr parker tried to discipline him, it’s hard to medicate him, because john is very violent, he said to his dad, i want to

stab you in the back, but the big question is, where’s the knife.

"Surreal skeptic, cynical cryptic! Licentious lecheries fabulist façade fantasias. Wild eyed spectral serene. Dream of catenary concoctions, ethereal salacious conjugation, bridge the gap in metaphysical mystique. Erotica erectile errantry’s exserted protuberance is a kinesiology kleptomaniac with his embark embargo extraditions and his execratory eventuation evocative expletives, a positive amalgamated anathema android of a terminus thrall. The shadow in the shade of the silhouette sojourn. The bailiff’s rakeness rails incarnate, unicorn railway nails and all. He will paint mirador bartizan panorama tableaus all over your proximity parameter perimeter peripherals. Force the enmity to acquiesce into impunity.” “Why this is not but an ogling ogre of an oligarchy omelet” she shrieked as he continued to tickle her. “Down here at the bizarre bazaar we all believe in the blasphemous farcical fugueness,” he said. “Positive orchestration renditions of transpositional interlude.” “Come here,” she said “let my clambering clamorous clangor write you a wield wile treatise expose’.  The legions of Chinga da are battling the hoards of Gunga din saying", "kinetic supremacy temporize tractive fluent" , "it’s sheer genocide. That plasty goop nosed porker of a Gumby ******* ***** monger Gunga doesn’t stand a chance. Coax cacophony clout, catatonic phonics, grizzly grotto grouches all”, She squealed. “Now you’re gumption dreaming”, he chimed. “Chutzpah panache spontaneous generation complicity, gambit alluvium aloof succor.”

All Is A Will For Power Nothing More

*******
hallucination in philosphical explanation
politicians drink my wine come and smoke my tea
we all tend to disagree from all the demonic mockery
painted fences with reckless advances
no second chances have to be perfect
whom do you seek or willingly agree
cats with blue hats
working so hard can give you a heart attack
put out some slack
stubborn liberal hot headed mess
feminist
equate logic for fear

existentialism at its best
I must clearly confess
we are in quite a mess
everyone's worshipping something
got a bun in the oven
kissing your second cousin
headed for destruction
inhillation in its soul vexation
Trump in his ivory tower can't even take a cold shower
North Korea's little boy porker
where the **** is this wall ?
do we have to hear it from the voice of a no it all

barbed wire fences
extremeties to watch suckers bleed
****** on the rise
abortion on demand
when will we ever live to understand
Elder Bush try's to get some bush
the corporate greed what a ******* sleeze
busy as a bee in your society
blinded leaders of the blind
some will fall into a great ditch
then most marry a *****
yet lust isn't pure love
we sweep things under the rug
Satan laughing spreads his wings
all in all by its evil twisted means

can't help you
cause they can't even help themselves
extortioners & real liars
no one has a voice today
no one gives a ****
worried abouth Hugh Hefner ******* on his final ***
zombie creatures with viscous fangs that bite dripping blood of side
you all want to just run away & hide
its the actual day of the walking dead face full of lead
for I exist as if a vapor then I am no more
a challenge to be free is a question of time

*******
hallucination in philosphical explanation
politicians drink my wine come and smoke my tea
we all tend to disagree from all the demonic mockery
painted fences with reckless advances
no second chances have to be perfect
whom do you seek or willingly agree
cats with blue hats
working so hard can give you a heart attack
put out some slack
stubborn liberal hot headed mess
feminist
equate logic for fear

existentialism at its best
I must clearly confess
we are in quite a mess
everyone's worshipping something
got a bun in the oven
kissing your second cousin
headed for destruction
inhillation in its soul vexation
Trump in his ivory tower can't even take a cold shower
North Korea's little boy porker
where the **** is this wall ?
do we have to hear it from the voice of a no it all

barbed wire fences
extremeties to watch suckers bleed
****** on the rise
abortion on demand
when will we ever live to understand
Elder Bush try's to get some bush
the corporate greed what a ******* sleeze
busy as a bee in your society
blinded leaders of the blind
some will fall into a great ditch
then most marry a *****
yet lust isn't pure love
we sweep things under the rug
Satan laughing spreads his wings
all in all by its evil twisted means

can't help you
cause they can't even help themselves
extortioners & real liars
no one has a voice today
no one gives a ****
worried abouth Hugh Hefner ******* on his final ***
zombie creatures with viscous fangs that bite dripping blood of side
you all want to just run away & hide
its the actual day of the walking dead face full of lead
for I exist as if a vapor then I am no more
a challenge to be free is a question of time
Inside I feel pain straight up from the rap game totally insane
Trump is not the voice of me I'm in the zone working on my legacy
Got bars you see making sweet history soaring to newer heights
Fresh words to be chosen I'm frozen put on foot in the oven my cousin
Rap needs chemistry you see working on my higher degree I cleave,
Please be responible or else you'd be in the hospital keep the game close
It's your choice got bars rolling in my Royal Royce got the hook up

A helpful teen
with girly friends
on holiday
in Newquay
let the lesson
commence.

Can you do me a favour
if you're off to the shops;
pick me up tampons,
marked normal on’t box

Yep, no problem at all.

Wow, a real mouth stretcher
a jumbo wodge porker
it slaps the ground
as it drops from my mouth

But Lisa and Liam are playing charades
exchanging sniggers, a ***** gaze
and don’t notice it slip under the sofa
to die.

Should 16 years old boys
know what they are?
I eyeball bus stop ads searching for clues
as I arrive at my reckoning
the Aldiest, Aldi, I’ve ever seen

I stakeout the aisle
containing ladies’ things
You know, lipsticks, cotton pads,
water that smells
I check for security
before I begin
some premeditated
drive-by
purchasing;
Yes, just like when I buy condoms

****. That’s one massive box!
a gargantuan bedrock
why didn’t she say?
how will I lug that all the way?
Shall I say they’ve sold out?
And each box is different
pluralist rejoice!
but none providing normal
as an option or choice
  
A shop assistant enters the aisle
at high noon
I’m forced to ask.
**** it, **** life, **** me in the ****!

Excuse me, Tracey (ooh pretty name)
what size do you buy
when you’re investing?
IN THESE - I ****** a box into her face
I still don't know why to this day
She reaches round me
'here you are love'
and rushes to safety
under plastic tassels

As I heave home my prey
what hero’s welcome will I receive?
a metrosexual epithet?
a badge of honour?
a heraldic coronet? Nope

SUPER! what the heck?
How big do you think my ***** is?

Now
I grew up in a house,
3 brothers
no daddy
and mother rarely talked about
what went up there

Lisa, settles and pulls me aside
Places her hands on my arms
‘Now, close your eyes’
Remember
last summer
after the fair
We swapped cidery kisses
on the bench by the tree
when it got dark
you put your hand up my skirt
what did it feel like?
A warmed poached egg…

…Strange, but ok
But not like Cheddar Gorge
Not a draughty, cavernous, unending space.
a vacuum, encompassing time and space!

…goes unpunished.

Doth nuns with colors and clouds.. squint their eyes and laugh at the rain through disguises?
Or royal guardians through other ways and words ask who shouldst beckon fealty to our places and palaces...
That mistresses do ask let there be chaos and war-
What if hate goes 8!.. at 9.. 89 ..98 re go the tyne.. to 70 30 60 40 calculating a clock **** over with the shell of the door or how bout mental stress punches you 9 thousand times?!
I'll say I had no way of knowing individuals can calm the **** out of people..
We're all from one of ten other categories(flack & livid) and our towne has less people so that hadn't reached
What returned with a mighty pebble twas a pass to also turn and prevent heightened welcomes from the king's high and wayfaring wanderer..
Let's do some MJB, some of us are glad that we're not part of what more often some of us were, anymore,..my sage begins the session...
It's slightly a slab jar mary joe bob though not so much of a gauged sandwich?!
Augmented by amusement and ****** camouflage, though the difference of decency is pretty small time on the big time potato chips of a geek scale...so was the dam ticket and the hot chicken beside it!
...the editor of revised fortune for your life inculcates that aversions rescind when the..
(talkmin bout)...
Oh?! You were going to call it?(fate) because if you go for this then an iron knuckle porker?!
This puff monkey that, while, if you should be attacked( formally with attitude) maybe you see you a... and so on?
Moon Jah has no techno drome me thinks the lady thinks "can't wait for boogie boarding and stuff"
If your so good at showing off with a personal cookie( then noted wishes of being taught) this summer there's better stuff
Surfing laughing and pain when the valentines include remember me
The phone number at the Hawaiian place is more or less what you could find on a picture at a studio gallery on the wall... P.S. .. .. .. It's of us laughing!!  They'd say
"Hi the moo moo cow hopes you live the dream of a super star or respected architect yet..."
I'd challenge "... the Lord Christian summer camp is really just a study group with hope at a crossroads..thus good folks had fun and new friends and life made it's processions"
Oh dear.. my what smooching that fox did supercalifragilisti- indefitaguh- soiree - legions of shackles are the  "CONVENTION"

              !! oh please goals meet declarations shouldn't be!!