Heart hurts so bad, its hard to even think, I know I gotta be strong, but how, when I feel so weak No idea why u tell me that you love me, want me to stay when I see the way you look at me, fighting everyday I'm holding on to what I thought we had but the longer I stay, it only makes me feel unwanted and bad. You make me out to seem like something I'm not You said You were grateful for me, so why are u letting my heart rot? Whats fkd up about it all is the whole time, you were the one pretending, because u never truly cared, not even now that its ending. Dont know how much longer I can take this, I cant keep feelin like i dnt exist, loving someone who doesn't give a ****. Cant keep killin my soul because you wont try to understand I thought you would better me, thought u were a different man. But now I see that things arent gna change, aren't gna get better. Not convinced by your fake smiles, dont believe your letters. I just wish I hadn't let you change me so much, so disgusted and dissapointed, with who I've become. And in your eyes, Im to blame. u do no wrong, feel no shame. Hearts going completely insain with pain, mind's withering away. Because theres no sensible reason why I'm still here, its not because I need u, its not because of fear. Guess I'm hanging on to the hope that maybe its just this place. Fighting the logical me, deep down I know things are gna be the same. Not sure if I should be proud that I stuck it out, or should be feeling stupid for ignoring all my doubts. Whatever it is, I need to find some sincere kinda peace. And I realized being w u, I'm just not happy with me
