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Yenson Nov 2018
The Cons fed no rations...hahaha

The house breaking Burglars are Chris, Joan, Tom and Kelly
Ably assisted by Jim and Cindy, the black and white *******
who broke up their families, move in together, to **** each other
Life's too short, forget abandoned spouses, what the hell, ok
Then there's Linda, who's had three husbands in ten years
all leaving after a while, leaving her with two kids
to look after, what a palaver, where's a true lover
These ******* ****, use and take then do a runner
Her trust in ******* men ruined to pieces and no nookie

All dysfunctional lives, full of pain, angry at the world
Yes we're in Limehouse, but do we have to **** sour juice
They're all seeking to vent, seeking revenge for their miseries
Look that couple upstairs, always bright, styled like Vogue
neat and tidy, full of laughter, going places, yuppie cts
See quiet husband, walks like Bowie, with a kin of **** swagger
And the wife so cute and petite, drives the shiny Red Mini
He ***** her every night, I hear them, I tell you
Their skins glows, shines like the sun, too happy by half

Chris the Scot married to strife and bother
The criminal life is such wahala, police here and there
its hide and seek, no money, no nookie, no nothing
Well OK, there's Tennants and Special Brew to drown the blues
****** hubby again in Wormwood Scrubs serving ******* Majesty
Tom ain't stealing as much as father, have to beg next door again
Joan is ******* and ain't making no money, now in the duff
only fifteen, by ******* Nobby, from the Young ******* Socialist Brigade, Kelly is also ******* and only twelve, what a life
Ahh ....  life on the Estate is life in *******

Listen you all, here's the deal, here's the number
Those ******* Happy couple at number fifteen
Why ain't them struggling like us all, where's the cushty
You don't see them carping, the ******* are loaded,
Them knobs have it all, smiling and laughing like *******
Let put some fire up their *****, let's teach them street life
Hears they think they are royalties, let tax their ****** *****
I'll be the lookout, you kick in the ****** doors
Liberate their valuables, we'll all have a party

******* Nora, the quiet man has blown a frigging gasket
Says he gonna tell all we are crooks, gonna evict us, the fool
Go get the posse, go put out a contract, a ****** for the jump
We are Eastenders, born by Bow bells, and we look after our own
How ****** dare the toffee nosed tory, says I should go get a job
as if, working for honest gain is our thing, ****** idiot
Yes mate, the boys are out, the contract is on
Let's see Jackanory tell us a bleeding story
Hero to Zero is now playing at Roman Street market

Break them up, mash  them down, ruin their lives
lets play 'trading Places, see how the c
ts feels
I already see cool man strung up. dangling on a rope
How dare they live happy and comfortable
two wages, car, dining out, new attire every day
Come on Jim, Cindy, Linda, all go get your mates
There's work to be done, no time to play
We are the TUC, that's Thieves United Confederation
And we've got the ******* Red Boys in the Team

It's down Tobacco road for Mr Tory, the bleeding ******
Ain't no more laughter, we'll put them in the gutter
Lie and slander, defame and harass, topple Saddam
Get the ******* Red mill going, its round Robin time
How's yer father,  no more mate, not ****** likely for a while
Yer only leg-over is gonna be legging it to the Social Security
Its Dole time, pain and miseries for you sunshine
Sing a song of hate, pariah on a roundabout
Yer marathon man now mate, come meet the Red Devils

Here, They need no ******* introduction
Zoe Roberts Mar 2020
(with apologies to Gil Scott-Heron)

You will have to stay home, sister.
You will charge up, tune in, drop out of all activities.
You will scroll through memes, trawl the news,
Skip the tea, you're running low.

The epidemic will be endlessly televised.

The epidemic will be brought to you in a trillion parts,
With declining commercial interruption.

The epidemic will show you pictures of Trump and Boris blithering,
Dreaming of fried chicken at the end of televisation,
"Oka-a-ay...".
"You are a terrible reporter!"

NHS-badged Hancock will look the part,
But cannot answer the question
Should I look after my sick self-isolated seventyish neighbour?

Fauci facepalms
And is gone.

Watch out, guys.
The epidemic will be televised.

The Epidemic (starring Tom Hanks) will not be brought to you on the big screen.
There will be no big screen.
The Epidemic will not play Glasto
Lit by 300,000 Androids.

The epidemic will be brought to you by friends and strangers.
The epidemic will be televised.

The epidemic will not inject fat into your posterior.
You will not need to shave or deodorise.
As it turns out, you are not worth that expensive holiday.
The epidemic will make you a bedroom star
Vlogging your incarceration to ten followers.

The epidemic will be televised.

There will be pictures of coughing queues at supermarkets
Toilet roll riots, thermometer wars.
There will be pictures of you and your best mate
Pushing that cart down the block,
Packed with Branston Pickle baked beans
Though you posted fifty times online about hoarding.
You will not have dressed for the occasion.

You will not care who wins Love Island.
You will not care who wins The Great British Bake Off.
Eastenders will be cancelled
After 35 years of continuous drama.

You will dodge the police for a quiet walk
On a brighter day.

The epidemic will be televised.

Reporters will cough.
Ministers will be replaced
Suddenly
Parliament will be suspended.
Politics will cease to be televised.

The epidemic will be right back, after a message.

You will have to worry about a germ in your bathroom,
Your food supply, the tiger in your tank, your loved ones,
Whether, if you cease to breathe, there will be a ventilator.

You will consider getting in the driver's seat.
Where to go?

Would you like to see your mother?
Would you like to cross a border?

The Caravan Park is occupied
By the Military.

Slowly, slowly
The screens will darken.

The epidemic will no longer be televised.

The Epidemic is not a game.  You cannot return to a previous Save.

The epidemic is live.
Aurora Aug 2018
Each morning we awake with our heads buried into each others chests, as if they were bags of sand.
As if, everyone outside of this tiny room, would disappear.

Each morning he would tell me I am beautiful, so I stop wearing makeup and feeling the pressure to shave.
I don’t change out of my pajamas or shower for a week and he still tells me; ‘you are beautiful’.

He is all too familiar with my history to lie and I am all too familiar with the grey area of comfortability that I paint for myself.
And yet still I reply; “I love you too”
and he believes me without hesitation.  

This feeling is so familiar that I no longer can tell if it is a lie or the truth.
But I know that he believes me.
He looks down at me with big rounded eyes as he smiles, and I tell him;
“crows-feet do not look good on anyone so can you please soften up your face”.

No night is complete without my relentless nagging to watch a film
and afterwards, I still complain.
I complain when he ignores me while playing video games and I complain when he talks during Eastenders.

I have this compulsive urge inside of me to text him about every aspect of my life, while he is at work, from going for a walk to taking a bath.
He never replies.
But he congratulates me when I do the dishes even though he works 6 days a week while I sleep.

He makes loving me seem so easy. He makes me feel as though I am worthy of being loved.

We are both aware that I have molded him into being exactly what I need him to be-
Both protector and provider.
Both willing to take on the hefty weight of my sins without burdening me with his own.

When the guilt becomes too much he calls me both ‘baby bear’ and ‘princess’ while he rubs my back to help me sleep.

When he catches me searching for my old lovers name on facebook, he says nothing.
When he tells me he bumped into my old lover on the street, he detects my mood change and holds me closer.

I know that he is hurting inside too, but I allow him to comfort me everyday that it rains,
and in this little town, that’s more often than not.

I don’t know why I feel closer to abandonment and burnt out flames,
than I do to the shelter he built for me so I never had to go cold again.

Every restaurant we visit, every pub we drink at, I see every man who has ever sat in his place.
I can’t resist the temptation to tell him the story of when another man sat me at this very table.

I don’t know what to tell him when he asks me why everything I have ever needed is not enough.
I think the answer lies somewhere in my art.

You build our future, while I build my career.
A career of box wrapped trauma converted into a museum spectacle.
You piece me together until I am complete, left feeling so content and so- uninspired.

The distinction between falling in love with creating art and falling in love with the pain that brought me here is not clear.

I can not deny the underlying humour when I cry to a ghost of a man, asking what parts of me he is not able to love.

I dug a hole so deep into your chest, so I could bury my head and forget all the heartbreak that came before you.
And you forced yourself so deeply into my heart that you are willing to ignore all the warning signs and for that I thank you.
First poem I have ever written so I hope no one is too harsh.
I went with a free verse style because I wanted it to feel natural.
Phillip Knight Sep 2016
(Voice 1-male)
This is not living
This sitting, nightly arrangement
Its purpose of entertainment
How could I care for the world around if I cannot hear it, touch it, taste it for myself?
We watch the same screen from opposite ends of the world
You have the best seat and I allow it, so you don't miss out
And we fill the void between us with empty crisp packets and the last dregs of a lonely can.
Once not so long ago
You would rest your legs over mine and consume the space.
And although I complained,
I never once minded, not really.

(Voice 2-female)
I wish you would touch me
Like you used to
Before we stagnated somewhere between Eastenders and Big Brother.
The way you would run your fingers up and down the soles of my feet.
Before work piled on the pressure
And you became too tired to tell me about your day
I remember when we didn't need the tv,
When our entertainment was the sound of each other’s voices,
Or the crackle of vinyl as we made love under its arches of sound,
Upon this very sofa
Where we now sit in awkward silence, together, yet apart.

(Voice 1-male)
I wish you still asked me about my day,
Even though I may not answer because I don't want to bring you down
Still it would be nice to know you cared.
I wish that remote would separate itself from our relationship,
Instead of being our adulterant, as we use it for the only pleasure between us.
I wish that at the end of the night, you would sit with me in silence,
The way we used to
Just wrapped in each other’s arms
The only entertainment we needed then,
Was listening for the moment our heartbeats synchronised
I wish we could have that again
Instead of you going to bed without so much as a good night kiss.

(Voice 2-female)
I wish you would follow me to bed
Instead of wallowing in front
Of your latest boxset conquest
You don't even say goodnight
As if I am doing you a disservice
And i wish you knew that in bed I cry
Longing for you to be as enthralled by me
As you is the TV.
When was our bed no longer the source of entertainment?

(Voice 1-male)
I wish you knew that I cry when you go to bed
Missing the time
When we were more important than sleep.
I wish I could turn off the television
I wish I could turn off my mind.
But I see that you no longer want me,
Or have any interest in me
When all I need is for you to ask
How are you?
Throw your arms around me
Take me away from the world
I need no other entertainment than that
Most of all
What I wish
Is that we could silence the world
And just be honest
And see that we are not that different
We are the same as we used to be
Before television took the life
Out of you and me
I wish, just for once, we would talk
Big Virge Nov 2019
It Seems ... Mr. Ross ...
Has BROKEN Some ... " Boundaries " ...
  
But ... If It's Not Him ...  
It's That Man ... " Ali G " ... !!!  
    
Or Maybe A ... " Pundit " ...  
On Late Night TV ... ?!?  
    
But ...  
Shows That They're SLAMMING ...  
Claim To Be ... " Comedies " ... ?!?  
    
Can Someone Explain ...  
How They Get On ... TV ... ?!?  
    
" Have I Got News For You "  
    
Is On ... BBC ...  
As is ... Mr. Ross ...  
But NOT ... Ali G ...  
    
Channel 4 ... Is The Channel ...  
Where He Seems To Be ...  
    
But ...  
Now They're Complaining ...  
That Things They Are Saying ...  
AREN'T Really ... " Funny " ... !?!  
    
But ...  
THIS Is ... LONG After ...  
Execs' Get MONEY ... !!!  
    
NOT Just Celebs' ...  
But THOSE ... TV Heads ...  
Who CLAIM That ... " The Edit " ...  
Didn't Get To ... THEIR DESK ... !?!  
    
So ....  
What Were They Doing ... ?  
Instead of ... Tape Viewing ... ?!?  
    
Now ...  
That Is A Thought ...  
To Leave Your Mind ... " Stewing " .............  
    
See ...  
THIS Is ... " The Problem " ...    
With Critics and ... " Liberals " ...  
THEY ... Twist and Turn ...  
Like ... " Arjen Robben " ... !!!  
    
It's OKAY To USE Blacks ...  
For ... SHAMELESS Displays ...  
EVEN If A GREAT MANY ...  
DON'T Behave THAT Way ... !?!  
    
But Some SILLY Blacks ...  
Are READY To Say ...  
    
" Don't worry i'll do it ! "  
    
Just For A ... " PAYDAY " ... !!!  
    
That's Just My View ...  
Cos' TV ... Is SEE THROUGH ...  
    
DON'T EVER Be Fooled ...  
They KNOW What They Do  ...  
    
These SHOCK VALUE Stories ...  
Remind Me of ... TORIES ... !!!  
    
and Like ... MOST of Them ...  
THESE Stories Just Bore Me ... !!!  
    
I Thought This Was WHY ...  
We Have The ... " Watershed " ... !?!  
    
Cos' ...  
By The Time ... Half Past Nine ...  
Shouldn't Kids Be IN BED ... ?!?  
    
Parents ... Be CAREFUL ...  
Which Channel You PRESS ... !!!  
    
Cos' Your Child May Just Be ... ???  
REPEATING ... What Is Said ...  
On ... Late Night TV ...  
To Get Some STREET CRED' ... !!!  
    
This Is MY Belief ...  
It's Those SAME TV Chiefs ...  
That PUT ... FOUL-MOUTHED Actors ...  
On .... " Comic Relief " ....  
    
They KNOW What They're Doing ...  
They SET UP ... SHOCK Viewing ... !!!!!  
    
From Soaps Like ... " Eastenders " ...  
To ... Late Night Agendas ...  
    
To ...  
CONJURE UP ... Figures ...  
From Ali G ... " WIGGERS' " ...  
To RAPPERS Who YES ...  
Are REALLY ... Gold Diggers ... !!!  
    
Who Just Try To ... SHOCK ...  
With Words That They've Got ... !!!  
    
THESE Rap Battles Generate ...  
MILLIONS of Sales ... !!!!!!  
    
Don't You SEE ... ?  
Thats' The Plot ...  
    
DON'T Sit and COMPLAIN ...  
Cos' The Lot We've Now Got ...  
Is Running ... AMOK ...  
    
Somewhat Like ...  
... Your SNOT ... !!!  
    
Whatever Has Happened ...  
To .... TECHNOLOGY .... ?!?  

Unless The Show's LIVE ...  
Can't They Just Use The BLEEP ... ?!?  
    
EVEN If The Show's LIVE ...  
I Suggest They Start Using ...  
Technology ... " Tricks " ...  
    
And Then THIS Whole PROBLEM ...  
Could Simply Be ... FIXED ...  
    
PROFANITY Is ...
Part of ... REALITY ...  
    
And REALITY Is ..  
A Reflection of ... " WE " ...  
    
The Image of ... YOU ...  
And The Image of ME ...    
    
I Hope ... This Little Poem ...  
Has Helped You To SEE ...  
    
That ...  
ALL of This ... NONSENSE ...  
Is Simply Just ... BLEEEEEEEEEPPPPPPPPPPPPP ... !!!!!!  
    
And THAT Is My View ...  
On These **** ...  
    
.... " Boundaries " ....
Hardly seems quite so relevant nowadays, however, after Dave Chappelles revelation about what's deemed suitable for TV and what's not, it's still an interesting subject. This was written around the time that Jonathan Ross had got into a little bit of hot water for F-Bombing A Comic Relief Show .... http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/entertainment/3226011.stm
Northern Poet Apr 14
Modern love
Plays out  
All over Facebook
And the social feeds
Not quite Shakespeare
It’s more Love Island themed
It started with a kiss
And ended with disease
True romance
Cozy nights in
A three course meal
Just for you
By him
Catching feels
***** flutters
Where digital love begins

Smitten kittens
Tagging each other
In the latest memes
A selfie before
The cinema screen
Holiday snaps
“A pic of my man
I love how he naps x”
Status updates
Painted on the wall
From single
To a relationship
In no time at all

Not quite Notting Hill
Just another IG Story
Eastenders drama
Is social media glory
Posting again
At 3 in the morning
The lies and deceit
Not so discreet
Posting the screenshots
And read receipts
“U ok ***
Wot happened
Babe DM me **”

Love to air your ***** laundry  
And filthy sheets
Content’s like clockwork
When a new lover’s
On the scene
Breaking up in style
Part of the routine
For an audience
That can’t help but stare
I’m obsessed
When a post is shared
No need for the town square
We’re all living
Vicariously through
You and your private affairs
Big Virge Nov 2019
Be True My Youth ...
Be True ... Be TRUE ... !!!!!

Don't Do The Things ...
That Make You ... " Blue " ... !!!

DON'T Lie to yourself ... !!!
Because ... Those Who DO ...
End Up Having ... PAINFUL Moods ... !!!!!

TRUST In That ...
Because ... That's The Truth ... !!!

I'm ... Saying To You ...
To ... Just Be TRUE ... !!!

Because Doing This ...
Can Help You DEAL ...
With Your ISSUES ... !!!

Do You Think It's Cool ... ?
To Give ... ABUSE ...
On The Street ...
And In Your School ... ?!?

Well Here's Some TRUTH ... !!!!!

That May .... " Exclude "
And That's NOT GOOD .... !!!

And Gives You Proof ...

THAT It's Better To Be TRUE ... !!!!!!!!
Than Walk Through Life ...
With A ... RUDE ATTITUDE ... !!!

TRUTH Makes People ...
.... RESPECT You .... !!!

But You Won't Get Respect ...
For Being ..... RUDE ..... !!!!!

Now Check This Out ...

I'm A Dude ...
Who Deals In ... TRUTH ... !!!!!

Poems I write ....
Will Give You Proof ...
That Truth Can Make ...
Your Wordplay .... " COOL "
And Even Get You Into Schools ...

Passing On .........
What You've Been Through ...

Now Isn't That Something ... ?
You'd ... Like To Do ... ???

If Words Could Make ...
Some Cash For YOU ... !?!

But TRUTH Can HURT ... !!!!!
DON'T Get It Confused ... ??!??

LIARS ...
Hate To Hear The TRUTH ... !!!

Be TRUE With People ...
Who You .... " LOVE " .... !!!!!

Because LYING Makes ...
Loving ... TOUGH ... !!!!!

And May Result ....
In ... NEGATIVE Stuff ... !?!

Being TRUE ....
Results In ... Finding Love ...

Be TRUE ... REFUSE To Lie To Prove ....
You're Worthy of Respect ...
When Facing .... FEUDS .... !!!!!!!!!

Cos' That's When TROUBLE ...
Starts To ..... BREW ...... !!!!!!!

Do I Have To ...
Give MORE Clues ... ?!?

STICK To TRUTH ...
NOT ... " Attitudes " ... !!!

THINK It Through ...
Take Time ... " REVIEW " ......
What It Is ...
That I'm Saying To You ... !!!!!

Being ... " False " ...
Just May Result ... ???
in Seeing Things ...
Like ... Gang Assaults ... !!!

Or Worse The LOSS ... !!!
of ..... " THAT THING " .....

Without A Cost .... !!!!!

Truth Can Make ...
These Actions ... STOP.

FALSENESS Also ...
Leads To ... PROBLEMS ... !!!
LYING Simply ....
Forwards ... NONSENSE ... !!!

I'm Saying ....
Use Some ... " Common Sense " ... !!!!!
And Use The TRUTH ...
As Your ..... " DEFENCE " ..... !!!!!!

Because Lying Leads To VIOLENCE ... !!!!!

NOT ... All The Time ... !!!
But ... LOOK For Signs ...
Take ... " My ADVICE " ....

DON'T End Up Doing ...
STUPID Crimes ....
Because You've Told ...

" A CROCK of LIES ! " ...

Check The NEWS ...
And Be ... ADVISED ...

Lies Provide A Simple Guide ...
That TRUTH Can OPEN ...
..... " Peoples Eyes " .....

While Those Who LIE ...
Are ..... " Criticised " .....
And End Up With ...
UNHAPPY Lives .... !!!!!

EASTENDERS' Shows This ...

..... ALL THE TIME ..... !!!!!

LYING  Can .....
Leave You ... " downsized " ... !!!!!

By This I Mean ...
Lies Can ... " Create " ...
Your Own DEMISE ... !!!!!

This Is Why ....
I'm Saying ... TRUTH ...
Is ... BETTER For You ...
Than Telling .... " LIES " .... !!!

TRUTH Is Something ...
For The ..... " WISE " ..... !!!!!
And Helps You Lead ...
A .... " HAPPY Life " ..... !!!!!!

Words of TRUTH
Are NOT ... " Devised " ... !!!

They Simply Come ...
From ... LIE FREE Minds ... !!!!!

I'm Using Mine ...
Through Use of Rhyme ...
And Through Usage ...
of ... " Poetic Designs " ...

These Words Are TRUE ...
And Simply Are ...

... " Big Virge's Views ! " ...

I Choose To Use ...
The TRUTH For Food .... !!!

Because Food Like THAT ...
Supplies ... The FACTS ... !!!!

NOT A life ...
of Smoking ... " CRACK " ... !!!!!

Drugs Like ... THAT ...
Can BREAK Your Back ... !!!!!!!!!!

And Leave Your Life ...
On ... " Dodgy Tracks " ... !!!!!

So ... Do Your Do .... !!!!!
LIVE LIFE ... Be Cool ...

But Do What's RIGHT ... !!!
When Sharing Views ...

ALWAYS ...

... " BE TRUE " ... !!!
The poem speaks for itself !
somebody set it on fire
somebody ripped the match

trio of wedges
Irn Bru orange

speckled with cherry
on a canvas of night

I am calling
from the flag square

near the building
constructed from crystals

this could be London
migraine of chalky lights

a revolving iris
far out across the bay

I’ll be home soon love
I know it’s strange

that work has dragged me
to this unpronounceable land

sweating skeleton
spilt milk network of streets

upside-down e’s
c’s with çurls of cable

and I hear the muffled diction
of EastEnders through the phone

can picture you
in strawberry-lace-

shade-slipper-socks
glass half-swollen with wine

the space on the sofa
where I should be
Written: 2018/19.
Explanation: A poem that was part of my MFA Creative Writing manuscript, in which I wrote poems about cities that have staged the Eurovision Song Contest, or taken the name of a song and written my own piece inspired by the title. I have received a mark for this body of work now, so am sharing the poems here.
I’m bored of going out
People make me shout
I just love the daytime tv
A Greggs breakfast will do for me

It’s Eastenders night tonight
I hoping there'll be a fight
Or an affair that ends in a flurry
I’ll view it while eating a curry

Whilst pondering a thriller
I check myself in the mirror
And wonder why I’m fat
How has it come to that

It’s all since my mothers death
When the alcohol stopped her breath
Cause my father ran off with a ****
After he dumped us from his heart

Nighttime is when I start the tears
I’ve being doing this for years
I punch myself in the face
Look at me I’m a disgrace

No one gives a **** about me
I’m a nobody is all they see
Sod it a cake will make me feel good
Instead of sleeping as I normally would

I hate being a couch potato
But it’s really all I know
I dream of it every single day
To be a dancer in the royal ballet

It’s late and I really need to sleep
Not curled up in a flabby slumped heap
But this film has got me by the hook
Think ill sit down and have a little look

— The End —