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Sam Apr 2018
Every night I end up thinking
Of why the world did this to me
I have never understood the meaning
Of how on earth this could be

Why, oh why am I so upset?
Because all I feel is pain and misery
My body gives me existential regret
Why I was born this way will always be a mystery

Disphoria is full of dark thoughts
About how people can tell that I'm fake
I always wish this body would just rot
And reveal a new one that I won't hate

I don't have normal body issues
I just wish my chest was nonexistent
I have to reach for the tissues
To wipe away my tears of existence

Some boys are born with comfort
I was one of the unlucky few
I was born unready and contort
And there's nothing I can do

I'm so unhappy that it's scary
I feel like there's no escape
And not just my sadness or wary
But from my horrible, disphoric mindscape
Disphoria is a big part of my life. It's not one I want but I might as well express it.
Lana Leandoer Dec 2014
The breeze from my fan gently caresses my body.
I am engulfed in the sweetness of the silence
and the ***** of the dark.
It's twenty-eight past one and I'm wide awake.
It isn't insomnia that overwhelms me on this night.
It is the thought of my queens stepping off their thrones
for me.
Mother and grandmother will be united with their prized possession in mere moments;
well moments are actually hours,
but time is slipping through my fingers.
Who would have thought that on the first of August,
a single visit from a family member could make me feel this way?
Happiness truly does exist when you wait for it.
He sure is a trickster in the world of imagination:
He hides for such a long time and makes it appear as if he has gone,
but he's not.
He's watching every move
and after a few cases of disphoric actions occur,
Happiness, accompanied by Karma, jump out to save their children.
It's beautiful,
also quite irritating,
but beautiful, all the same.
This is just the way of the world.
The sooner one comes to this realization,
the sooner they will be content with their own being.

— The End —