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Nigel Morgan Jan 2014
Today has been a difficult day he thought, as there on his desk, finally, lay some evidence of his struggle with the music he was writing. Since early this morning he’d been backtracking, remembering the steps that had enabled him to write the entirely successful first movement. He was going over the traces, examining the clues that were there (somewhere) in his sketches and diary jottings. They always seem so disorganised these marks and words and graphics, but eventually a little clarity was revealed and he could hear and see the music for what it was. But what was it to become? He had a firm idea, but he didn’t know how to go about getting it onto the page. The second slow movement seemed as elusive today as ever it had been.

There was something intrinsically difficult about slow music, particularly slow music for strings. The instruments’ ability to sustain and make pitches and chords flow seamlessly into one another magnified every inconsistency of his part-writing technique and harmonic justification. Faster music, music that constantly moved and changed, was just so much easier. The errors disappeared before the ear could catch them.

Writing music that was slow in tempo, whose harmonic rhythm was measured and took its time, required a level of sustained thought that only silence and intense concentration made properly possible. His studio was far from silent (outside the traffic spat and roared) and today his concentration seemed at a particularly low ebb. He was modelling this music on a Vivaldi Concerto, No.6 from L’Estro Armonico. That collective title meant Harmonic Inspiration, and inspiring this collection of 12 concerti for strings certainly was. Bach reworked six of these concertos in a variety of ways.

He could imagine the affect of this music from that magical city of the sea, Venice, La Serenissima, appearing as a warm but fresh wind of harmony and invention across those early, usually handwritten scores. Bach’s predecessors, Schutz and Schein had travelled to Venice and studied under the Gabrielis and later the maestro himself, Claudio Monteverdi. But for Bach the limitations of his situation, without such patronage enjoyed by earlier generations, made such journeying impossible. At twenty he did travel on foot from Arnstadt to Lubeck, some 250 miles, to experience the ***** improvisations of Dietriche Buxtehude, and stayed some three months to copy Buxtehude’s scores, managing to avoid the temptation of his daughter who, it was said, ‘went with the post’ on the Kapelmeister’s retirement. Handel’s visit to Buxtehude lasted twenty-four hours. To go to Italy? No. For Bach it was not to be.

But for this present day composer he had been to Italy, and his piece was to be his memory of Venice in the dark, sea-damp days of November when the acqua alta pursued its inhabitants (and all those tourists) about the city calles. No matter if the weather had been bad, it had been an arresting experience, and he enjoyed recovering the differing qualities of it in unguarded moments, usually when walking, because in Venice one walked, because that was how the city revealed itself despite the advice of John Ruskin and later Jan Morris who reckoned you had to have your own boat to properly experience this almost floating city.

As he chipped away at this unforgiving rock of a second movement he suddenly recalled that today was the first day of Epiphany, and in Venice the peculiar festival of La Befana. A strange tale this, where according to the legend, the night before the Wise Men arrived at the manger they stopped at the shack of an old woman to ask directions. They invited her to come along but she replied that she was too busy. Then a shepherd asked her to join him but again she refused. Later that night, she saw a great light in the sky and decided to join the Wise Men and the shepherd bearing gifts that had belonged to her child who had died. She got lost and never found the manger. Now La Befana flies around on her broomstick each year on the 11th night, bringing gifts to children in hopes that she might find the Baby Jesus. Children hang their stockings on the evening of January 5 awaiting the visit of La Befana. Hmm, he thought, and today the gondoliers take part in a race dressed as old women, and with a broomstick stuck vertically as a mast from each boat. Ah, L’Epiphania.

Here in this English Cathedral city where our composer lived Epiphany was celebrated only by the presence of a crib of contemporary sculptured forms that for many years had never ceased to beguile him, had made him stop and wonder. And this morning on his way out from Morning Office he had stopped and knelt by the figures he had so often meditated upon, and noticed three gifts, a golden box, a glass dish of incense and a tiny carved cabinet of myrrh,  laid in front of the Christ Child.

Yes, he would think of his second movement as ‘L’Epiphania’. It would be full of quiet  and slow wonder, but like the tale of La Befana a searching piece with no conclusion except a seque into the final fast and spirited conclusion to the piece. His second movement would be a night piece, an interlude that spoke of the mystery of the Incarnation, of God becoming Man. That seemed rather ambitious, but he felt it was a worthy ambition nevertheless.
Steve Page Feb 2019
PRAYER IS A TEAM SPORT

[In the voice of your favourite over-excited rugby commentator.]

We're inside the final quarter. We've seen a bone-cruncher of a contest today and there's no sign of a let up, the pray-ers gather for the next engagement, positioning themselves with practiced confidence, skillfully supporting each other, ready for the push.  You can see every knee and each hand bears the marks from this long muddied pray, red and brown staining every inch of their entwined limbs; - arms and hands holding fast.

Front row.
Second row.
Back row.
Digging in for the big push.

The opposition has played an intelligent game, taking advantage of any lapse in concentration, any sign of tiredness, looking for any weakness to exploit.  The pray-ers know they can't afford any slips now, they need to keep up the pressure, maintain their advance deep in the opposition's half.  Every yard of gained ground needs to be defended.

The pray-ers' Coach looks on - look at his smile! You can see the pride he has for his team, he's schooled them on every tactic of the opposition and now that training, that practice has paid dividends. This is a team of pray-ers that so clearly know each other well, supporting each other every step of the way. You can see their coordinated pray, their sustained effort and the sheer pleasure they feel when they are praying together.

The pray-ers drive on.  The sound of their groans and deep breaths merge into one. There's a rhythm to it, a cadence as together they push and PUSH. 

The opposition's footing is slipping, the pray-ers' momentum gains pace and, YES! the resistance collapses.  Oh, that must have hurt!

But there's no time for complacency, the pray-ers re-form their line looking for the next opening, the next opportunity to push forward.

This is a joy to see.  The Coach shouts his encouragement - this was never going to be an easy struggle; you can't dismiss the opposition - they are a seasoned though sometimes disorganised team and they can take you by surprise.  But as we've seen here today, the Coach knows that if his team of pray-ers keep to the plan and pray to their strengths, the opposition are surely in for a hiding. The pray-ers will triumph and they will take the winners' crown.
- Now back to the action.
Inspired by the Six Nations tournament
Nihl Jul 2013
I’m no longer under her spell,

I see her for what she likely really is.

A simple and boring creature,

Just another stain on the world.

Bound to be one more dying shadow.

A memory
dead and tucked away
within the dusty, disorganised, shelves
of my library, archive of mind.
Between
the bay laurel plant and the star of the sea..
Even if she ate organic
and drank of my flesh and seed,
like a goddess for a moment.

N.H.
Sjr1000 Jun 2014
He was far too disorganised
driving too fast
here and there
with no particular place to go.

She was a neon light
flashing
in the black Mojave night
a celestial mansion
alive
with such sweet smells.

He now had a purpose
a story to tell of
a
thousand fantasies
hotter
than the hinges
on the gates of hell
sparklers of desire
flaming through neurons on fire.

He was lite up
like
neon
in the dark Mojave night
all he could see
was
delights
in
every window burning bright.

Her fingers beckoned him
her eyes pleaded
her breath said
yes yes yes
her
body
danced and swayed
perfect harmony with all he craved.

He moved closer
moment by moment
movement by movement
to
take her to places promised.

He reached to take her hand
there was one
exquisite flash
disintegrated
shred into ash
on the pointed arrow
of
her forever flames

Just like that.
The line "hotter than the hinges on the gates of hell" is from Todd Snider's Play a Train Song.
Thanks Todd.
One of mine and The Masked SleepyZ's favorite lines, had to get it in there.
Stanley Wilkin Nov 2015
I grieve for you in the cold quiet of winter
My absent child, my long lost son
Warming my hands over dying flames, frost covered smouldering clinker,
By the wood where icy streams run
Through the shrunken sedge, and barren fields
Stretching for miles, empty of meaning.
The landscape like a worn photograph yields
Your tremulous smile, then nothing.

Here, you ran with startled steps
Through the yielding sheaves, yelling with surprise,
Chasing indifferent spiders, and discomfited birds
With hatred in their pebble pool-dark eyes.
Querying awkwardly spoken words, small
Tenacious fingers that caress and clutch
Every passing object, loudly chuckling, wisely playing me for a fool
A silly father who loved too much.

On the anniversary of your leaving I required solitude
Partnered only by memory
Away from familiar crowds, the booming, barking fusillade
Of the present day commonplace urban itinerary,
Where only the crackle of snow
And the fleeting trajectory of birds
Distracts my slow
Marshalling of comforting thoughts.

The cottage where we lived haunts the shallow glade,
A shrouded ghost swaddled by the half-light,
Positioned squarely like an old man, its cladding beginning to fade,
White branches like dead-fingers that gleam in the night.
In the closet are your dust-sprinkled toys, a yellow plastic duck,
A cheap skateboard, ancient video games,
A guitar you never learnt to pluck
A chess board on which you pulverised my endgames.

In the preserved furnishings of your bedroom
Your school work gathered into stacks
Barely visible in the gloom,
Our life together in disorganised packs
Denoting year and level
Development and academic achievement,
If any, (but I mustn’t once again cavil)
Indicating, even in your earliest years, a specific bent.

Standing on the mantelpiece, propped up against the wall,
Are brightly coloured, polished pictures
Of you. Plump, blonde, agreeably small
Dancing, standing, jumping, grinning, absurdly wistful mixtures.
A bitter echo resonating from the shadows
A cold thought darkening into memory
The spectre of your voice disappearing in the meadows
Having left all of us! Having left me!
A Thomas Hawkins Mar 2010
If Monday were a poem
it would be short and terse
Disorganised and cluttered
not a friendly little verse

If Tuesday were a poem
much better it would fare
Over the words that went within
I'd be inclined to care

If Wednesday were a poem
it would be full of hope
the week is halfway over and
we climb back down the rope

If Thursday were a poem
looking forward it would be
dreaming of the weekend
and the joys that it will see

If Friday were a poem
t'would be happy, bright and gay
for work is finally over
and now its time to play

If Saturday was poetry
as frequently it is
Then I would sit alone and write
A poem such as this

But Sundays where this poem
comes to a natural end
For tomorrow will be Monday
and it will start again.
©A Thomas Hawkins 2010
http://poetryinprogress.com

The Community Poetry Project
The creation of a handwritten poetry compilation featuring poems from poets around the world. For full details visit http://cheaperthantherapy.net
Paul Goring Nov 2010
And he showed me
his arthritic hands;
pink ginger roots,
digits disorganised
& apologised
for not being able
to carry his own
suitcase
Copyright Paul Goring 2010
Life's a Beach Oct 2013
There is a pressure in someone needing you,
a pressure many of you will know.
It's the expectancy that you can bring to
them, some otherworldly glow.
Even though you feel your own light dimmed,
they still wish for you to help them with theirs,
unaware that others face issues too.

Sometimes you need escape, from
everyone and everything.
Sometimes you need...normality. Sometimes.

What can I give you?
You're busy, well, I'm busy too,
busy-ness and stress are not things
specific only to you.

There is only so much I can do.
When I have work, and
family and
friends and I haven't
seen Dad in weeks and
everything is laying
once again in tatters, as always,
but never mind because all that
matters is that there
is always that
one last thing to
mend.

That one thing.
Sometimes it's me,
sometimes it's a boy or girl,
sometimes it's a friend
or a loved one
or an unfixable object.

Sometimes, darling, it's you.

You have no idea how much I want to help you.

I'm trying. Give me that.
Fine, I ****** up, but
I'm human too.
I'm imperfect and selfish, but
so is everyone,
including you.

I am no angel, you thought
too much.
I have fought, and will continue
to fight on your side, but I'll
not abide you placing on
me so much pressure,
I cannot always be the cheshire
cat of smiles, cannot always be
lost, cannot always be drifting.
Sometimes I'm just tired, over worked
but happy.
Which isn't so bad to be.

I don't like people seeing me weak,
I detest the fact that I turn
so meek at the mere sight of
people.
I don't want you to pity me.

I want you to be my friend.
You are my friend,
I've given you my trust,
why can't you see how tough
that was to give?
I'm not about to give up on you,
so don't give up on me.

I enjoy spending time with you,
love laughing at your jokes,
messing with your gelled up hair
and thinking that, for a couple of minutes,
I took away the cares that bothered you.

You cannot disbelieve that which is true.

Darling, sometimes I need space,
I need sleep and peace, with
no pressure to be perfect.
Sometimes I cancel plans, but
there is always a reason, a valid excuse,
and I would rather I
didn't turn to find abuse for this.

When I've had to go to a funeral and,
for once, would like someone near at
night, which recently has caused me fright to be alone,
the right response is
to wish for my boy to be near.

So I did. I told you. I felt bad.

I feel sad that you're aching,
but everybody hurts.

After a bonfire, when I
can't get back til late, and
I feel tired and weighted down
with aches and bruises, I tend
to lose my wish to hitchhike
home, so that I can feel bad
for feeling sleepy.
So I can feel bad for keeping
you waiting.

In that moment, all I want is
coffee, and near
friends and tea.

Whatever you wanted me to be,
it wasn't human.
It wasn't me.

Fine, I'm ****,
I'm a ***** and
a ***, and obviously
don't care at all, but after
all these years I have the
***** to say something to
your face (well..computer screen).

Don't you dare erase me.
Not after all of this.

I'm dyslexic, naturally
disorganised, my sense of
time and calendar is catastrophic and
I'm forever full of work and
dance and sleep.

But you're going to keep me,
please,
because I don't deserve to be
ditched.

If you don't agree, then you're the *****.
I'm sorry. I said that, and you said it was fine.

Obviously you didn't mean it. Ouch.
You're still my friend, but am I still yours?
Edward Coles Feb 2014
I am not a denominator of original sin,
some remnant or aftermath of fallen grace.
Indeed, I am hardly human at all.

I live in the spaces between breath and mist,
where gravity dares suspend its hold
and all matter slips away until nothing matters.

I pour drinks so I can afford to drink.
It pays my way towards the dead-end
now occluding the avenue that used to stretch

beyond it.

I am not a believer in disorganised action.
Each moment spent in self-destruction
was thoughtfully done to bring about art and demise.

I live in the moment between charm quark and decay,
where gravity falls to weakness
and all that matters slips into temperance.

I eat only to satisfy appetite.
It tastes of nothing but the dead-ends
that now occlude the avenue that used to stretch

far beyond me.
©
On living outside of organised religion, whilst science offers little to describe the self.
Rai Oct 2011
The coffee cup holds memories of last nights lipstick
Passion and fire
The desire to be wanted more
Clings to the recesses of my heart strings
He left early
Quietly slipping away before the morning
Could bring new arrangments
In an already disorganised life

Shrugging off the mild feeling of rejection
She stretches her arms up high
And breathes in all the goodness that
Is her life

Strange moments when desire meets its destination
How strange that she would not have it any other way

Morning brings rays of sunshine that bounce against the
Prisms that hang around the room inside her heart
The momentary awareness makes her realise
She misses her friends
It is time to catch the train back home

Oh how she loves the feeling of new beginings
Reuniting with who she really is
And who she has become

There are many desire's she harbour's in her bay of understanding
If you allow her to teather her boat
for a while upon your shore
You will smile with the child within her eyes
And she will hold on tight
Whilst she bathes with you
Within an ocean so blue
This is a short story that was written for a contest  'Magic with a cliffhanger'


The young magician had waited all day for his audition on Britain’s Got Talent.

He arrived at the concert hall in London at 7am, even though the doors did not open until 9am. Being two hours early however did not put him at the front of the queue, and the smile of anticipation turned into a scowl when he saw the crowd around the entrance. Hundreds of contestants, both young and old, and boy did they look weird.

Jimmy came from a normal family, and lived in a normal street with other normal people. Looking at this group of strangely dresses misfits, normal did not have any part in their lives.

His first inclination had been to turn away and get the bus back home, but his determination to show his true talent to the obnoxious Simon Cowell helped him overcome his disgust at what he saw in front of him.

He forced himself to join the disorganised mob that he deemed an excuse for a queue and after a few minutes, he found himself wedged between an overweight middle-aged woman and an extremely tall teenager. The woman wore a bright yellow suit with red buttons, and volunteered the information that she had always wanted to run away to the circus to become a clown. Jimmy nodded and gave her a weak smile, a smile that masked his silent opinion that the woman was crazy. Fortunately, the tall teenager kept his ambitions to himself, though the fact he wore a frogman’s outfit did have Jimmy wondering.

When the doors opened a man holding a megaphone came out and bellowed a welcome to the rabble, and he tried to create some sort of order to the aforementioned queue. His attempt failed and as that was the last Jimmy heard of him, he could only assume the man went down at the weight of the pressing mob.

Eventually Jimmy obtained a ticket with the number 304 written on it in bold felt-tipped pen. “304” thought Jimmy, “three hundred and ruddy four, I'll be here hours”.

And it did take hours, hours of purgatory before his number came to the top of the list, hours surrounded by the strangest and most pathetic people that Jimmy had ever met.
Minutes later introductions were made to the two grinning imbeciles that he had seen many times before on the television screen on what seemed like every Saturday evening since he had been born. Suddenly there was a camera in his face as they asked him about props and music. Jimmy shook his head and answered the smiling duo, “I don’t need anything, just my wand and this black cloth”

Ant and Dec ushered the young magician onto the stage.

Jimmy was momentarily stunned at the size of the audience, and more so at the noise they made.

Pulling his thoughts together and taking a deep breath Jimmy walked to the centre of the stage and stood in front of the microphone.

“Hello, what’s your name?” asked one of the female judges.

“My name is Jimmy,” answered the young magician.

“And what are you going to do for us today?”

“I am going to make Simon disappear”

The crowd roared with laughter, the noise was quite overwhelming and Jimmy stepped back a few feet feeling quite dizzy.

Simon Cowell got to his feet waving his hands at the audience and spoke to Jimmy.

“OK, young Merlin, it seems like this unruly mob want to see your trick. Do you want me to come on stage, or are you going to magic me away from there”.

Jimmy regained his composure when he heard Simon’s pleasant voice, and saw his beaming smile.

“Can you come up here please,” said Jimmy.

Simon walked up the steps onto the stage and stood before Jimmy.

Jimmy unfolded the black cloth that he had been holding, it became bigger and bigger as it unfolded and the crowd roared with yet more laughter.

The young magician asked Simon to cover himself in the cloth, which he did without objection.

The crowd roared some more as they heard Simon shout out. “Hurry up Jimmy, I can’t see anything from under this cloth, and I'm scared of the dark”.

Jimmy took out his wand and waved it around while he mumbled a few well-chosen mystical words.

“Hubble, bubble, away from here, obnoxious Simon disappear”

Jimmy tapped the black cloth that was completely covering the self-professed “biggest man in show business”.

The black cloth crumpled to the stage in a small pile as the cheers and screams grew louder as the audience witnessed the disappearance of Simon.

Jimmy knelt down and refolded the black cloth as Ant and Dec strolled onto the stage both clapping in unison.

“Brilliant,” said Ant.

“Where is he”, said Dec.

“Gone” replied Jimmy...

as he walked off stage.
This is a short story that was written for a contest  'Magic with a cliffhanger'
Thomas EG Aug 2018
It is easy to see that I'm flawed
Yes, it is splayed out for all to see
I am hopelessly co-dependant
Utterly disorganised and depressed

Stupidly ridden with anxieties
(Thus awful at living in the moment)
Easily distracted but not detached
And yet, deeply submerged in love

As you're my favourite thing
About myself

And it is easy to see that I'm loved
Or at least it should be, although,
You do remind me the right amount
For me to feel... not so lonely

Not so unloved
Not so unloveable
I love you
Llahi Fuego Mar 2012
The delicate scent of your perfume soaked in my sweater
Or the feeling of the last kiss
Lingering
On my lips.
Or my skin's memory of your fingertips,
Or when my eyes fight a losing battle with sleep,
And then it's nothing but dreams of you.
All this
Is the impression you leave on me,
I am an art canvas.

You have a key to my house
Yet you're not my girlfriend.
It's a complicated relationship
And at the same time it's not.
I'm happiest at the bar on a Saturday night
But you always want to stay in.
I'm hungover on a Sunday
But you want to wake up and live.
You're a sweet and pleasant girl
And me, with my simple yet devilish ways,
I am a rogue.

I text you and you come over.
"That skirt," I say, opening the door for you, "I'm pretty sure it can cure cancer."
And with the rapidity of lightning,
You blush crimson.
Now in the kitchen, pouring yourself a glass of water.
"Is this what you were having for lunch?"
"Yes."
"Really? Frozen pizza and Kool-Aid?" you raise an eyebrow.
"Yes."
"You're so... I dunno... in general, you're just... I dunno... disorganised? clueless about life? stupid? weird? drunk with alarming regularity? irrational? stupid? Wait, did I already say that?"
"Yes you did. But wait, these are good qualities, right?"
"Yup. Just what I look for in a guy," you walk to me and kiss me on the lips,
We kiss some more,
Touching, rubbing,
"Just a sec," I pull away, "I'm sorry if I taste like pizza."
You look at me like I'm an idiot,"Just... shut up and kiss me!"
You're getting wet and excited
Like a child at a water park.
That's an odd comparison,
Well I guess
I am weird.

I'm inside of you,
But I am so convinced that it is not ***,
Such intensity,
Such deepening fulfillment.
No, that was not ***,
It was naked poetry.
I am a poet.
clxrion Nov 2013
dregs in the teacup
it looks blacker today
perhaps it'd look better on the tablecloth

no
it stains a deep brown
splotchy, disorganised
it spreads so you can't control it

maybe it's better suited
for the whitewashed walls
trickling down the surface
did someone cry?

you can feel the bitter burn on your tongue when you pour it down the sink
maybe it's better left there
don't look
LJ Chaplin Aug 2013
I don't know where to start my journey,
The start seems too obvious,
I'd rather start from the end and make my way back,
Collecting the debris of the mistakes I have made,
So when I reach the beginning I can retrace my steps
Once more and live a life without the missing pieces.
I'll be older and wiser
Stronger and braver
Have the courage to heal the scars.

I like to think that this dark patch
Is just a test,
A temporary phase that is testing my strength,
My power,
My will to live.
Although at the moment it seems like a war I will irrevocably lose,
That doesn't mean I should throw my guns into the sand
And let the white flag blow in the desert storm of my insecurities.

A little guidance goes a long way,
And soon I will have that guidance,
A hand to hold,
A shoulder to purge the rest of those unwanted tears
From my disorganised subconsciousness.

It is a frightening and truly fearful journey,
I cannot deny it,
But we all have to start somewhere
So that we can grasp onto that epiphany
That will light up the pavement to our final and hopeful destination.
A lot has been going on recently. The people I love the most have seen the darker side to me that I have tried so hard to hide from them. But now I couldn't be any more grateful. I'm getting help and I will mend in time. I have so much love for the people who have stuck by me through it all, and this poem is an ode to not only those who have supported me, but also to those who still have hope. Never give up, you're not unfixable!
Matthew James Mar 2017
Pin
Pin.

Here's a pin.
I know this pin is tiny,
Much smaller than me,
Inanimate,
Not capable of moving without my help.

I'm aware of all those things.
I'm realistic.
When I talk about the pin;
When I hold the pin;
When I show others the pin;
When others hold the pin;
I show my awareness,
Outer calm,
Rationality.

This is just a pin.

I show this because I'm afraid.

Not just of the pin.
(With its tiny but incredibly sharp point, that a person could place carelessly or deliberately so that it could pierce, several inches, into the soft part of my foot.)

But also because of how foolish I will look, in front of you, when you know how much I am afraid of this ...

One ...

Tiny ...

Pin.

Instead, I tell you of the pin, of its dangers, of how I manage its dangers by being aware of the pin;
By my knowledge of its sharp point;
by the knowledge of how to put that pin away, so that I can not stumble upon that pin as it pierces into that vulnerable part of my skin.

But I'm disorganised ... and in reality, when things are busy, I don't always have time to put away pins. I have bigger things to deal with, and... at the end of the day...

I enter the room,
aware of the pin,
afraid of its sharp point.
Focussed on the pin,
On the pain it would bring,
Were I to stand on it.
I step close to the pin.
How close can I get without that sharp pain?
I want to live,
Without being ruled by a pin.
So shiny.
So sharp.
So small.
So insignificant.
So painful.


Ouch!

I'll put that pin away now so that nobody can see how much it hurts.
AuEcologica Jan 2019
We’re too easy, aren’t we, too complicated, aren’t we?

Life is a disorganised show, aspire to it enjoy
as it progresses as a circle, round and round.

You’ll find a meaning friend; this is not the end
Not by a mile
A milestone, not even close.

Right, we have to fight, aren’t you tired?

You’ll find a meaning friend; this is not the end
Not by a mile
A milestone, not even close.

We’re obsessed, how troublesome, we’re the “best”, how troublesome.

I’ll die at the end of each night, to be reborn
As a saviour as an executioner—life’s too kind.

You’ll find a meaning friend; this is not the end
Not by a mile
A milestone, not even close.

Right, we have to fight, aren’t you tired?

You’ll find a meaning friend; this is not the end
Not by a mile
A milestone, not even close.

You’ll have to understand, as I’ve by misunderstanding
You can find something beautiful even if you do not comprehend it.

You’ll have to understand, as I’ve by misunderstanding
Your perfection is not the only beauty on earth.

Right, we have to fight, aren’t you tired?
We have to fight our own battles, battle our wars, being a child was so beautiful.

We have to fight, but not ourselves.
Jamie Treavish Mar 2018
I’m a deranged sociopathic psychopath with bipolar disorder because my life consists of completely disorganised order in a disorientated mind that knows about oxygen but doesn’t stop to breathe because it drowns in air that keeps inhaling the life out of me with every beat of my unforgiving heart that bows to the mercy of my unprecedented inability to feel my own soul that has a lack of appreciation for my unwanted body that was found in the lost and found nest of a womb that grew a creature with no sight because it only housed oblivion with a warm welcome to the inferno of the blinding light that appreciated death before death as it was deaf to the encumbered pink flesh of a shattered process in the concept of thinking through no mind of my own as I don’t belong I simply exist but existence is unobtainable.
Dacia B Nov 2014
Yes, indeed that is what it must all come down to. The battle of our spectacularly mediocre existence and work. The constant struggle between good and evil. Those who realise this see what it is that the universe has been wishpering to us from the very beginning that it is all we must do. It is the very force that drives it all. Like the oxygen into our lungs that gets released inot the blood stream, totally nessery for our movement and survival. But alas it has been faded. In the now in which we live it ha been tainted by scewd by a few in power, They rob us of what it is to be GOOD AND TURN US INTO parasites who must consume and own. This is evil and has cause only death and pain to the human race. The population of which so vast as if we are mini planets. We all revolve around something. We all have a meaning, a purpose, a sun which warms us and keeps of alive. Yet we all have a moon that brings darkness and beauty heart breakingly simotainously. Our loves and friends our neighbouring planets, part of our solar system. Everything, every aspect of the universe must order itself into these formations. It is law. The skeliton, the psyisics behind why such things must be leak out into everyones life everyday without a single exception. The rule is simple. Life our experience is the universe. Beautiful yet dangerously chaotic. Sallowly disorganised but like each drop of water in a river it has a path which it must flow down dispite the rapids. Those who can make the connections have only one hope to be free. That is to see things in their essence. To value all life no matter how big or small as life in a vast universe is a perious maricle and we must start by honering our own. Then understandly reaching our hands out to others.
Be good.
Elaine C Apr 30
when i die,
i refuse to be a nameless grave
marked by a chunk of stone
in the earth

when i die,
i want flowers to be planted
over where i lay
so new life may grow from me

when i die,
i wish to be neat and pretty
a contrast to how i've been in life
frenetic and disorganised

when i die,
will i be remembered?
or will memories of me fade too soon?
and i will turn to dust
we will all slowly turn to dust
i do not wish for my life to be meaningless while i live it but if i do nothing of meaning in life, maybe my death can be full of meaning.
magic marley Jun 2014
On my journey home I saw a wanting red sign halting my path,
Gusts of glorious winds pushed the fabulous reaching crown of a tree as a collection of beautiful birds seared the skies
A swarm of cars approached like a black smoke shadowing my sight, while a flock of disorganised people dissassembled,
The sign withstood the people, but the wind was too much
The red ink from the sign slowly dripped off...
The car engines stuttered and faltered, slowly waiting for life... The people disappeared...
The wind still pushed smugly, and the trees stood tall and proud
The birds dropped as much as they could on the sign...
The sign read "Stop".
Spectre Aug 2017
The threads of fate are disorganised and free,
                                   no confines of expectations to hold them,
          each living person a loom, weaving possibilities,
                                           intertwining chances,
    unpredictability,
                                                     and tragedy...

Not a single plan conforms to the threads of fate, and one day, what nobody will see coming, is a marvelous tapestry of fortune.
Nobody can predict the future, but this doesn't mean bad things are set in stone.
Olivia Kent Nov 2014
There is a touch of confusion.
Is there a God?
What are his values?
Is he in control of heaven and Earth?
Is he in control of hell?
Hell on Earth maybe.
Is he indeed he, or maybe a she?
In essence, all the religions of the organised world.
They're very disorganised.
If there were a God would he watch good people die?
Would he or she offer clemency to those who apparently slaughter?
The helpers the blessed, the winners, the sinners.
Hell is a situation that coats the planet's head.
It matters not to anyone which: deity the poor man follows.
Allah with five pillars of wisdom, wise indeed and very kind.
Guatama Buddha, lord of noble truths, sat in meditation beneath the lotus blossom tree.
If I did religion that would be the one for me.
Moses with commandments, a cool idea indeed.
No men really follow them, that's the thing to fear.
Men **** brothers, women **** sisters.
If there is a God he's seeming somewhat sinister.
(C) Livvi
.
Munch Gee Nov 2017
A daily drunken father
A mother who waits for death
A house unkempt
The bills just almost paid.

Bed wetting.

The "games" the older boys played
"Visitors" while asleep
The crush who liked your friend
The pain that ran too deep.

Disorganised language.

The boyfriend who never called
the bouts of crying making sense of it all
The endless assignments due.
The crticism, first class and thesis too.

Feeling a presence of "God"

The boy you both liked and not
The one who confused you a lot
Working till 5 am
On market research again and again

Delusions.

The confusion that grew and grew
The heightened senses that were all but true
Connecting colossal dots
A higher calling and the lot.

Hearing voices.

Everyone is watching me
I have no privacy
My phone is tapped
And i am trapped
Everyone wearing a disguise
Filling my head with lies.

Paranoia.

A book that burst it's way
Out of me and held sway
Jesus's commands
Abiding by his demands.

Grandiose delusions.

Mountain highs and abyss lows
Shabby clothes, things all over the floor
Manic shopping sprees
Poems buzz in my head like bees
Barely staying awake
Not much from me to take

Mania and Apathy.

"You left this group"
Disabled Facebook
Backed out of the hen night
Everything wrong seems right

Socially withdrawn.

Smoking a near pack
Unironed clothes and slack
Persistent thoughts of death
Messy hair and dried up sweat.

Suicidal thoughts.

A drunken father still
A mother barely paying the bills
Still afraid to soundly sleep
A slow descent of sanity, slow and steep.
Caroline Ward Mar 2017
My childhood sits
At the opposite end of a room
Alongside a worn, comfy chair
Clear in my line of sight
Until someone stands
And obscures my view
And I wait for them to move again.
It's a room that I never seem to leave
But at times it seems
So distant
And unfamiliar
As if facing a stranger.

The room is full
And the air around
Smells like something I know well
Salty sea air, dog fur
Coco chanel
And wet paint.
It's a mix of tangy
And sweet.
A cocktail or a witches potion.

I face straight on,
But
From the corner of my eye
I can see
Yellow and blue swings
Soaring straight to the sky
And back again into
Warm loving arms
That patch me up
As I fall time and time again
But remain fearless.
If I whirl around I feel that I can
Face it
But it blurrs and blinds my eyes
So I turn away
Remain detached.

At times I feel like
I have been cruelly snatched
From my place here
But deep down I knew
I was beginning to outgrow it
Even though it seemed to
Fit so well.
My new skin sometimes feels rough
And flimsy
Stretched and put back together
Nothing like days of sunshine
and our own world at the beach.

I'm still living in the daze of a disney dream,
Still afraid of the dark
Eagerly awaiting my prince charming
Hiding in my imagination
Pretending to be myself
As if I'm content in adulthood.
I know behind my shoulder
Childhood stands
Waves and beckons
Begging me to join them
In play and fun.
I force myself to walk on
Knowing that if I turned around
It would disappear
Fly away like dust in a breeze.
Because my childhood has left
And only a room
Of disorganised
Well loved
Memories
Remain.
James Jul 2019
they're watching us talking
just like observing ants work
there's helium in their ego
and lipstick on the mirror
they're idle to the agreed
arranged to the disorganised
they've planned the route already
just like in an ants farm
there's welcomes at the hallways
smirks at the poor
they've drowned millions of us already
and we're only on the first floor
Describe the scene, a dream that followed a horrible crime, and I must of played that album a hundred times by now.

A letter, one of my alluring poems from the mentally disorganised.

No collection of words makes one man listen, and the power to not notice a boy who stood still.

And I signed it as I did: ''From Alfred.'' with nothing but one kiss.

Because two more too many I wouldn't mean.
Daan Jan 2017
Align my words and see me
as I am.
Disorganised messes,
the hurt and deeply feeling,
pained and wronged
get my attention.

I tried to capture all of you
tried to hold you
tried to comfort
tried to help.

I am just one person
overruled by others
caring unconditionally
thanked unfrequently,
as mothers, as pets.
Let's keep these secrets,
let's wait and see
silently.
See what happens when we're gone.
Prom3theus Feb 2016
70
I wonder, as I wander meandering down meander lines, whether meaning lies as simple lines, or branches like the trees about which climb aloft, just as with meanings and intentions, I can't see the endings nor the roots of soils retention, which are buried beneath just like it is in us hidden and only revealed; in a small and concealed mention.

But my attention is not broken, like the fallen branches as gifts or tokens, which lay snapped and separate at my feet, disorganised as soldiers bodies who lay dying on a war ground in defeat, along with these comrades are kept, autumn-ed oranged leaves of trees, that crunch beneath my step and fly within the breeze, as the wind ebbs and flows around me, as the forest breathes.

Though life is as equally as around me, as it is walking down the road, somehow I'm more comfortable amongst these, though they're as equally unknown. There isn't stillness, life is here, the forest flows and moves and it feels like kin are near, that the branches pushing out are reaching like open arms to hold me, contrary to what midnight shadows and horror stories have always taught me.

These contorted, twisted statues so stern and certain, that you are drawn behind the curtain into worlds beyond your own, far past the treaded paths that are to us so comfortably known, to dimensions pushing out into further, by mother nature to preserve her unknowns, these haunting hollow hallows happily taken as adopted homes.

All my wonderings are clearing as the forests edge I am now nearing, all those thoughts I had been fearing are lost and bliss is searing on my mind, though the future is where I’m headed, to the present I am tethered, gone away is the dreaded past on those treaded paths I leave behind.
I try not to have favourites of my poems, but I have always liked this one even if it pushes the English language for it to work...

— The End —