I know you are older than me,
there are substantial years between us.
I see a woman who tries hard to be strong
to combat the daily **** she encounters.
I know you think you hide it and to others you surely do,
well, in fact.
It is plain to see you do a good job.
But I am not them.
I see.
I know.
Behind your soulful brown eyes
I know you are the woman who has lived twice.
Like many warriors on planet earth you were not given a choice.
You did not have the luxury from birth to live a life that was solely yours.
You carried the weight.
You shed tears like the skin you shed,
when one day you stopped and told yourself,
you deserved more,
you deserved more than pain
and putting others first.
Like many women you reached an age where your maternal need became too great to ignore.
As a girl your dreams carried you to motherhood
but that's all they could ever be; fantasy, imaginary games.
Reality would deal you your set of cards.
Devastatingly; there would be no fetus in the womb.
You would routinely feel dull aches upon glancing at mothers,
returning to their husbands.
Doing the school run,
grocery shopping.
Rising to acute levels of pain.
The type you struggle to brush off.
When you know something's really wrong.
That very same suburbia you rolled your eyes at,
convincing yourself you didn't want it.
Became all you ever wanted.
Always just slightly out of reach.
You would build a home with what little resources you had.
In turn, that home would be the prettiest in the neighborhood.
Delicate twining vines of sweet honeysuckle
Sun flowers standing tall and proud
to match your sunny disposition.
Anyone who ever passed could have sworn they were wearing a beaming smile.
I would call round to repaint your white picket fence,
in return for a handful of digestives and your company.
Harboring a deep heartfelt respect I would try to channel through my eyes.
I would tell you I am here.
And I can be more.
If you need me.
And how I would love to make you laugh,
really laugh,
throw back your head.
I know there is a lightness to your depth.
You have had to be so strong for so long.
It is not too late to be whisked off your feet.
