Intro: 2Pac

There's gon' be some stuff you gon' see
that's gon' make it hard to smile in the future.
But through whatever you see,
through all the rain and the pain,
you gotta keep your sense of humor.
You gotta be able to smile through all this *******.
Remember that.
Mmm, yeah.
Keep ya head up.Yeah.

Verse One: 2Pac

Our lifestyles be close captioned
addicted to fatal attractions
Pictures of actions be played back
in the midst of mashin'
No fairy tales for this young black male
Some see me stranded in this land of hell, jail, and crack sales
Hustlin' and heart be a ***** culture
or the repercutions while bustin' on backstabbin' vultures
Sellin' my soul for material wishes, fast cars and *******
Wishin' I live my life a legend, immortalized in pictures
Why shed tears? Save your sympathy
My childhood years were spent buryin' my peers in the cemetary
Here's a message to the newborns, waitin' to breathe
If you believe then you can achieve
Just look at me
Against all odds, though life is hard we carry on
Livin' in the projects, broke with no lights on
To all the seeds that follow me
protect your essence
Born with less, but you still precious
Just smile for me now

Chours: Johnny P, 2Pac

Smiiiiiile for me , won't you smile (smile for me now)
Just smiiiile (smile), smile for me
(What cha lookin' all sad for, ***** you black, smile for me now)
Smiiiiiile for me (***** you ain't got nothin' to be worried about)
Won't you smile (no doubt, smile for me now) just smiiiiile
(And the next generation)

Verse Two: Scarface

Now as I open up my story
with the blaze a your blunts
And you can picture thoughts slowly
up on phrases I wrote
And I can walk you through the days that I done
I often wish that I could save everyone
but I'm a dreamer
Have you ever seen a ***** who was strong in the game
overlookin' his tomorrows and they finally came?
Look back on childhood memories and I'm still feelin' the pain
Turnin' circles in my life came to dealin' *******
To many hassles in my local life, survivin' the strain
And a man without a focus, life could drive him insane
Stuck inside a ghetto fantasy hopin' it'd change
But when I focus on reality we broke and in chains
Had a dream of livin' wealthy and makin' it big
And after all my momma's thankin' God for blessin' the child
All my momma gots to do now is collect it and smile
Smile

Chorus (without 2pac)

Verse Three: 2Pac

**** the world as we ???? and witness furious speeds
of nasty questions keep us all stressin', curious G's
Backstabbed and bleedin', ******' thoughts laced with ****
Learnin', duckin' stray shots, bullets be hot, they burnin'
Inhalin' sherm smoke, visualized the flames
Will I be smothered by my own pain?
Strange whispers, cowards conversate, so quick to dis us
Takin' pictures for the feds, and desperate hopes they'd get us
Hit us off, give us plenty centuries, forgive my sins
Since I ain't in many penitenturies the best revenge is **** friends
We military minded soldiers, bustin' shots blindly
Tryin' to find Jehovah to help me
Somebody save me
Lost and crazy, scared to drop a seed hopin' I ain't cursed my babies
Maybe now ****** feel me now, picture my pain
embrace my words make the world change
And still I smile *****

(Scarface talking)

And now a moment of silence, let us pray
And as you journey into outerspace
may the angels help to lead the way
shine up on your soul to keep you safe
And all the homies that done passed away
They there to greet you as you pass the gates
And as you headed to the tunnel's light
I hope it leads to eternal life
We say the prayers for our homie 'Pac
Smile

(Smile for me)
(All ya need to do is smile)
(Woooo smile for me)
(Come on smile for me)

http://youtu.be/RGFytiWwsRo
(this is a link to a video that I created for this poem)
Ridgewood (Where We Wait)
We take the most delicious train
to the Queens-Brooklyn border to get here
Where everything is liminal, uncertain, undecided
Even the foundation, Arbitration Rock, at the house on Onderdonk
Was buried for centuries, dug up, and chucked on another imaginary line
The streets are on a grid, and the border on a diagonal
making a stair-stepping hypotenuse of the confused
A challenge to put your time to good use
even on the oz-like yellow brick road on Stockholm
You hear Poles on the street muttering “Marnowanie mojego
czasu tutaj” through the bachata dripping
from the apartments above the stores on Fresh Pond Road

Two of the best restaurants in the boroughs
Rosa’s pizza and Zum Stammtisch mark
the north and south borders of the hill where we wait  
During the seventy-seven riots, Ridgewood
seceded from her stepsister, broke from Boswijk and Breuckelen
-
There’s racism here like carbon monoxide smoke:
at the Ridgewood Y, a man sweats through his shirt
revealing swastikas pierced through the skin underneath
and the Romanian dentist down the street drilling
says “Cred ca am pierd timpul meu aici”
through the machinery scream and burning enamel
she won’t say this if you understand what she means

Walking past the 99 cent stores and the pharmacies,
remembering that there is good, fast, and cheap
But you can only have two of them at the same time,
Crazy Loretta, under her navy knit woolen hat
in her pink sweatsuit and winter coat, smokes
her shaking hand-rolled cigarettes below the train
trestle grinning with her jaw-jutting through
her inch thick specs.  She waggles her chicken bone fingers
saying, “Hiya honey” when you walk by.
If you are brave enough to stop and talk to her,
she’ll tell you that her nephew plays
for the Texas Rangers and her daughter
is a doctor and she’ll probably give you bedbugs
She’ll tell you, fascinated, like a child: “when you squish them - the blood comes out”
She’ll tell you the same thing tomorrow - Loretta forgets.  
In her mind, a phrase like green smoke from her youth
Ich glaube, ich bin meine Zeit hier

The playgrounds are packed with children
practicing how to swear, the girls huddled
reading Twilight like the Bible, and the boys
huddled reading the girls like the Bible
A woman yells to her son to come home a third time
and mutters “Creo que estoy perdiendo mi tiempo aquí”

Buried in Machpelah Cemetary less than a mile from my house,
is the place Houdini is still staging his greatest escape
He has a wide audience.  Sometimes I think there are more dead
residents of Ridgewood than living ones.  The cemeteries stretch
the borders of the appropriate spilling into Christ
the King high school’s front lawn.  Driving Cypress Hills street,
the Manhattan skyscrapers rise looking tomb-toothed parallaxed and
blurry through ephemeral sepulchres, stones, and cement angels pointing at the sky

On one of the stones it says simply: Videor perdo temporis hic
I think we are wasting our time here.

12/24/2013


Sitting at the bar.
A man approached me with the line, "you have beautiful eyes."
A simple *** object he made my eyes
a device to leverage me into bed.
How cute.
I said Look into my eyes.
Tell me do you see hues of green and the most beautiful brown bestowed upon my body?
I call them Hazel.
as if they had a name for human pieces of flesh filled with blood.
Filled with the anger, Filled with rage, and Filled with envy which accompany sorrow.
But search further through my furrowed brow and you'll find no regrets even in the deepest depths of my iris and its solitude.
These eyes have seen themselves in the mirror.
Faced with a ***** reflection but don't blame the fragile glass surface with smudges and stains until it shatters.
You can't clean Hazel's ***** soul.
judgmental stares.
***** eyes. **** eyes.
Eyes that have been buried in armpits and stared deep into an *******.
Relentlessly unforgiving in his shallow stares,
Hazel was once so pure.
Eyes with a spark ready to ignite flames of fun now
Burnt to a **** crisp.
But you,
You with your drink in hand,
trying to pick up a trick for a quick.
You fueled the fire.
You burned down the bridge and led Hazel to walk off the cliff.
You killed my eyes.
My beautiful beautiful dead dead eyes.

i just signed ya death certificate
cause the angel of death descended
a death sentence was inscripted in the scroll i was given
i came to bury anybody in the rap cemetary
while im the one who wrote the obituary
no wakes cause the body cant be presented
come to ya funeral in attendance
im the one who was spitting
i bring the bodybags before the killing
to zip em up in em
after the battle finished
cause yall battling a menace
im the seed of dennis
but im not kidding
evrybdy a victim
this is only genesis
the beginning
its vicious more in the ending
final decision
is death
cause thesee bars is an hex
these spells at my request

There's a large white canopy
In the cemetary;
The guests are in their best.
The vows averred
So long ago
Are proved
And laid to rest.

The effigies once
On the cake,
Immortalized,
At the wake.

Inside the gated community,
Dead and wed,
A surety,
Now silent
For eternity.

Magpies in the
     cemetary;
I sit and remember
beneath the pines.
How cold the world
     seems at times.
You were always
     there.
Magpies in the cemetary --
the dogwood branches bare,
skeleton trees shrouded
by winter's chill.
I sit and remember.
Mother, father...
I miss you so.

Its been almost a year
and I still can’t forget the way it felt like a graveyard to kiss you

I’m still trying to get the taste of dirt and formaldehyde off of my tongue

and according to a recent poll taken by me
I miss you more than the legal limit

so tonight I’m calling the police in hopes they will arrest me  

another broken heart taken off the streets

winded and chilled.
did your feathers get ruffled
as you flew in from the storm?
molting on my carpet
take a bath, birdy.
cleanse those wings
and wash your bony knees.
I don't want to see those nasty bruises
so cover your skin
and fly away again.
let me see those eyes, birdy.
have you a cold or
did the bitter cold
leave you blind?
better for you,
to see not with eyes but with frail
birdy fingers.
don't hate your world, birdy.
you're no more
no less
than any other ******
who shoves past you in the supermarket.
we all came out of a filthy ******* ******
so climb off your high horse
and get in line.
we're all just waiting around
til someone digs us hole
or lights us on fire.
so birdy,
if you can help it,
don't be a *******.
out you go,
into the cold.
smile birdy,
be glad for the sun in the mornings.

the sorrow in the walk
is what gives it away
They walk to the military graveyard
to remember to respect
walk away
and thank God they are still alive

The darkness, as well as the drying roses

The quiet and sad moaning,

of people and lost souls

Fresh graveyard dirt and the fading scent of lilies.

Salty tears, as they cascade down faces

The heart aches and throbs.

Sea breeze carrying scents
From foreign fields.
Blossoming sympathies reaching
Out over the fences of Lafayette
Cemetary.
Forest breath rustling leaves with
Faint animal musk and the
Serenity of centuries.
Still nothing smells quite like a
Young woman; bare feet and towel
Draped- fresh from
Shower
Passing.

I sit on that bench,
surrounded by rotting wood
& listening to the warblers.
But despite being near them,
I find no comfort here.
For my lost loved ones
were more than fond memories,
these mounds of dirt.

In the distance I hear them barking
to me,
calling me.

Where were we when you quit the sound?
Caught in distance while you hung around
Encased inside of our own menial pursuit  
Flaunting desperation as a constant survival
As you battled death in your combat boots
There is no glory with fate as your rival

What were you seeing in your distorted mind?
As you ate your last words and ecstaticly dined
At the chemical festival of illusions' absorbtion
How far did your gaze stroll onto the other side?
did you meet with an end or the start of damnation?
In which lonely drawer do your dreams now reside?

Where have the remnants of life made their grave?
Are they in the lingering regret that you've paved?
Through each flash of your face and casket sight
The delusional rebirth of your presence revealing;
Fragments of ended realities giving spark to night
Burning sigils into visions of a broken feeling

Flame lit sketches etched across a charred eulogy
Only a name remains lying in the wake of a memory
Pieces scattered amongst an unfitting resting place
Conflicting beauties molding a divine contrast
A devil laid to rest in the midst of holy space
One shade of diversity on a bland earthly cast

Echoes of descension from this dimming black sky
Adorning each reflection with your hollow eyes
Complexions left searching for an answer to hold
As to how lifes' vigor can so swiftly fall to decay
And,The aging of dignity resembling every tale told
Seems to shine a reality check on this tragic play

A nulling backdrop for this cemetary playground
Where the kings and queens become tediously crowned
With a sickly ailment that reaks of dalipidation
The stench of the end atop an eternal retrospect
Glaring back with the most sincere of validations
That the fallen live on as our recollections resurect

These lost years of loneliness and social depravity
Have left me with nothing except this written tragedy
I sat and watched as the walls of my life crumbled away
Into this contorted sensation twisting through dismay
These ceaseless rememberance sessions screaming inside
A dead fixed stare on old friends taking cyanide

These bonds have come together in such a swift motion
And, just as fast they've came to their abrubt destruction
Dispersing any tint of mutual belonging from view
Molding a sad landscape of sighs and failing virtue
Watching as the remnants of my relationships loiter
The catacombs of these stockpiled confession letters

If only I could say anything my empathy had to tell me
My skeletal pose might have perched upright in a higher degree
And I would of have grown to a more formidable size
A clear cut aspiration that I never came to realize
Until all that I held grew too big for me to carry
and left me to stumble and sleep at the cemetary

Scratching dead love songs on century old gravestones
Where the forgotten have slept for generations alone
Hoping the crude penmanship might grace a weary heart
Or help a looming ghost feel a taste of love and depart
From the fog filled graveyard parade that it dwells
A final ringing from the synapsis of the greif bells

Sparking the ruin of a memory that doesn't seem real
A fading echo of a brotherhood I wish I could still feel
Detached from a reality that lurks in a decrepit imagery
Reshaping my empty cognition through a fake neuro surgery
I've reached the point where I have no reason to find
A replacement for all these buried pictures astray in my mind

Here, amidst the gray
Tombstones jutting like so
Many teeth from the ground,
One can discover
Mysteries: of silence, of sadness, of
Death.
The favorite haunt of
Night's children; a landscape of
The unknown, a city of many potentials
Waiting to be discovered.
Naked trees scattered here and there,
Their crooked grasping branches
Stirring in the cold gale.

As the burning mass of light
Shining like shards of glass
Falls lower and lower in the sky
And the world grows dim,
The souls of yesterday come
Out of their diurnal slumber.
Souls who wail like banshees
Lamenting their lost lives;
Souls who whisk about
Playfully, clearly enjoying the afterlife;
And souls that, upon meeting a mortal
Mournfully whisper
"Do you know who killed me?"
"Where's my mommy?"
But none can answer.

These souls are the true
Memento Mori, for they are
Not-so-living reminders that
We too shall enter their world
Some distant day.

Sundown
You're next to me while I sigh and frown
And the beer is on our lips
While Los Angeles hangs in the clouds
The dead are the only witnesses around

Kiss me at the cemetery
I won't tell her and you won't tell him

You're my only friend on this hill of death
Roses cover our scent
We meet at the end of the darkest street
Where we smoke all of our sins

Venice Beach
Where we meet- Marvelous Things fill the air
I'm at the bar while you strum your guitar
And sing "It's not too late to change"
( I took that to heart)

Kiss me at the cemetery
I won't tell her and you won't tell him

You're my only friend on this hill of death
Roses cover our scent
We meet at the end of the darkest street
Where we smoke all of our sins

Cemetary Memories
Hair as black as sin

It's just me against the world
[Girl:]
Oooohhh, oooohhh
[2Pac:]
Nuttin to lose...
It's just me against the world baby
[Girl:]
Oahhhh, oahhhahh
[2Pac:]
I got nuttin to lose
It's just me against the world
[Girl:]
Oh-hahhh
[2Pac:]
Stuck in the game
Me against the world baby

[Verse 1: 2Pac]
Can you picture my prophecy?
Stress in the city, the cops is hot for me
The projects is full of bullets, the bodies is droppin
There ain't no stoppin me
Constantly movin while makin millions
Witnessin killings, leavin dead bodies in abandoned buildings
Can't raise the children cause they're illin
Addicted to killin and the appeal from the cap peelin
Without feelin, but will they last or be blasted?
Hard headed *******
Maybe he'll listen in his casket - the aftermath
More bodies being buried - I'm losing my homies in a hurry
They're relocating to the cemetary
Got me worried, stressin, my vision's blurried
The question is will I live? No one in the world loves me
I'm headed for danger, don't trust strangers
Put one in the chamber whenever I'm feelin this anger
Don't wanna make excuses, cause this is how it is
What's the use unless we're shootin no one notices the youth
It's just me against the world baby

[Girl:]
Me against the world
[2Pac:]
It's just me against the world
[Girl:]
Ooooh yeah, ooo-hooo
[2Pac:]
It's just me against the world
[Girl:]
Me against the world
[2Pac:]
Cause it's just me against the world baby
[Girl:]
Hey!
[2Pac:]
Me against the world
[Girl:]
Ooooh yeah
[2Pac:]
I got nuttin to lose
It's just me against the world baby
[Girl:]
I got nothing to lose

[Verse 2: Dramacydal]
Could somebody help me? I'm out here all by myself
See ladies in stores, Baby Capone's, livin wealthy
Pictures of my birth on this Earth is what I'm dreamin
Seein Daddy's *****, full of crooked demons, already crazy
And screamin I guess them nightmares as a child
Had me scared, but left me prepared for a while
Is there another route? For a crooked Outlaw
Veteran, a villian, a young ****, who one day shall fall

Everday there's mo' death, and plus I'm dough-less
I'm seein mo' reasons for me to proceed with thievin
Scheme on the scheming and leave they peeps grieving
Cause ain't no bucks to stack up, my nuts is backed up
I'm bout to act up, go load the Mac up, now watch me klacka
Tried makin fat cuts, but yo it ain't workin
And Evil's lurking, I can see him smirking
When I gets to pervin, so what?
Go put some work in, and make my mail, makin sales
Risking 25 with a 'L', but oh well

[Girl:]
Me against the world
[2Pac:]
With nuttin to lose
It's just me against the world
[Girl:]
Ooh yeah... oooh-ooooh
[2Pac:]
It's just me against the world baby
[Girl:]
Me against the world
[2Pac:]
I got nuttin to lose
It's just me against the world
[Girl:]
Oahhhohh
[2Pac:]
Ha ha
It's just me against the world baby
[Girl:]
Ha-ahh, HA-AHH!
[2Pac:]
With nuttin to lose
It's just me against the world baby
[Girl:]
Me against the world, hoahhh
[2Pac:]
Me against the world
I got nuttin to lose
It's just me against the world baby
[Girl:]
Ha-hahh (hehe) heyy!

[Verse 3: 2Pac]
With all this extra stressin
The question I wonder is after death, after my last breath
When will I finally get to rest? Through this supression
They punish the people that's askin questions
And those that possess, steal from the ones without possessions
The message I stress: to make it stop study your lessons
Don't settle for less - even a genius asks-es questions
Be grateful for blessings
Don't ever change, keep your essence
The power is in the people and politics we address
Always do your best, don't let the pressure make you panic
And when you get stranded
And things don't go the way you planned it
Dreamin of riches, in a position of makin a difference
Politicians and hypocrites, they don't wanna listen
If I'm insane, it's the fame made a brother change
It wasn't nuttin like the game
It's just me against the world

[Girl:]
Me against the world
[2Pac:]
Nuttin to lose
It's just me against the world baby
[Girl:]
Me against the world
[2Pac:]
Got me stuck in the game
It's just me against the world
[Girl:]
Oahahhhh
[2Pac:]
I'd be ashamed to lose
It's just me against the world baby
[Girl:]
Me against the world

[Outro: 2Pac]
Heh, hahahahahahah
That's right
I know it seem hard sometimes but uhh
Remember one thing
Through every dark night, there's a bright day after that
So no matter how hard it get, stick your chest out
Keep your head up, and handle it

[Girl:]
Me against the world [x3]

Hey i saw you today at The Mortuary.
You looked sad. Was she your mother, the brunette middle-aged woman who was crying all the time? When i saw you i felt something. I really liked you.
Your dark straight hair. Your pale face.
You're such a handsome young man.
Too bad, huh?

I heard you died of some terrible gunshot wounds.
I died two weeks ago. My boyfriend ***** me and then buried me somewhere in the forest. God. I loved him so much. Didn't know ****** was something he could have been capable of doing.
They buried me in The Pinehill Woodstraw Cemetary yesterday.
I think they're going to bury you here as well. Is it today? Oh yeah my name is Halley Maryanne Byrne. I am buried next to my grandparents. Just find the Grey Gravestone with two angels on it. I like my gravestone. It's beautiful. My parents chose the best for me.

Okay i'll be waiting for you here.
Let's hope they're not going to bury you too far from me. I really need to talk with you and get to know you better.
See you at your funeral! I'll be there.
Oh i can't wait.


P.S. Nice Tux!

*Your new friend, Halley.

Our bodies will rot
in the green of the earth.
Crammed into a box and
drilled into the ground
as if purity ate us whole.
You'll be buried with your rosaries
and I with my pearl earrings;
and if there is such a thing as heaven,
our souls will entangle
and our corpses will be holding hands.

I am from my grandmother,who snuck out of the house to smoke camel non-filtered

I am from the middle of nowhere, not far from town.

I am from the pine tree with a water hose tied on it, where I imagined  I was Indiana Jones.

I am from the woods, where the cicadas sang at night.

I am from the kudzu that blanketed the trees and menaced the garden.

I am from the apple trees in the front yard, whose fruit                         never turned red.

I am from the middle of nowhere, not far from town.

I am from my grandfather’s plaid pockets, where he would pull out                     suckers.

I am from my father’s mustang that i crashed into the driveway.

I am from my great-grandfather’s picture, proudly displayed on the              wooden mantle.

I am from my grandmother’s bible stories, in the back bedroom where she read every night.

I am from the middle of nowhere, not far from town.

I am from Highway 494, where the trees were leveled to build subdivisions.

I am from the soft red clay and moist brown earth of the backyard.

I am from the moonlight I could see from the top of my house late at night.

I am from the sweltering heat and uncut grass in the front yard.

I am from the middle of nowhere, not far from town.

I am from the small cemetary past the corner store, where my grandfather      lies next to my grandmother,

and my father next to her.

I am from Uptown New Orleans, where my daughter learns her A.B.C’s in the back bedroom

where she prays every night

I am from the brown bag from the Shell station that i fill with suckers, and sneak to her when her mom isn’t watching.

I am from the picture of us dancing at a music festival, her on my shoulders, displayed proudly on the wooden mantle.

I am not from from anywhere, in the middle of town

Where do I find a poem?
In the space of a blink,
Between heartbeats,
When idle or moving,
With family and friends,
In a cemetary,
At school,
On a beach,
On-line,
On a bench, sitting beside me.
In the four seasons,
Beneath the blue, black and starry canopy,
In the wild, sapian or worldly,
In the arts and prophets,
Crawling on the floor,
When I'm cooking;
And, when I'm not looking,
A poem will find me.

When I think of you
I see nothing but putrid filth
Your heart is blacker than the darkest night
And your soul-substitute is filled with pus
Filthy foulness oozing from wounds
Suppurating with germs and graveyard worms
Christ Jesu I beg on my bony knees
In the deserted cemetary of my heart
That He will make you burn in Hell
Slowly inserting blazing steel knives in your eyes
While evil demons rip your guts out
And eat your colon before your living eyes .

old men walk slowly
back down the road
emerge out of a war
fought in their youth
when blood was up
and spirits high
cooled now in memories
long distant away
many only walk
as far as the edges
and stop at the cemetery gates
unable to go further
turn and return to their graves

I passed the new york in your eyes notriously
before ever really speaking the language that they shrieked

the rigourus dimensions
the pale fingers speak
Im crisp
as the apple giving birth to her death
send your signals to me

fly seas
dance in breeze

remember the ****** when in her blackened tongue she speaks
fragility giving birth to her gritty skeletons
came to me one night and begged me to breathe
poetically told me it was me the universe seeks

not who they said I was
but to shed the hiding technique
the ill and sly words in my tongue raging to leak
the ordained freak and the memories
laying in the back of my mind somewhere,
those
those real antiques


Im a princess in the world of words itself
and the universe is my boutique
I brush the pink smile upon my cheek
and I grab what I want with the strength of ease

to my side I kick those ordinary bullies
and now Im watching them burn in the lowest average of these cities
I let my hair grow
wear bright colors
and dance the dance of the gipsies
I take life back further than the fifties
then further then the thirties

I run to the cemetary and mingle with that one zombie
the one who I let go of
and let him explain to me the details of my hidden worries

he tells me to let them go

I shoot the fatigued oldness in the heart with the spine of my arrow
I make loves to all my shadows
I hallow in my very mellow
state of mind
my intrinsic phsyco
my cronic rainbow

I dont need your superfiality
because as human I have won the mental lotto