apprently I am not alone
but sometimes
in the middle of the night
when my foot kicks of the covers
and the fan above me circles around
spraying cold air on curled toetips
and I cannot sleep
I can't find someone to talk to
sometimes
when its not quite what I said
but I can't quite say what I mean
because I'm afraid of what that means
and maybe it'll go away
anyways
I feel alone
sometimes
though they love me
and they kiss me on the lips
the cheek
closed eyelids (my favorite,
almost itself a dream)
though they tell me
and I feel it
I get in my own head about it
sometimes
it hurts me in the longrun
because sometimes it never goes away
and though they kiss me (my favorite)
it's the inside of eyelids
that keep me up
