The smile of iceboxes annihilates me.
Such blue currents in the veins of my loved one!
I hear her great heart purr.

From her lips ampersands and percent signs
Exit like kisses.
It is Monday in her mind: morals

Launder and present themselves.
What am I to make of these contradictions?
I wear white cuffs, I bow.

Is this love then, this red material
Issuing from the steele needle that flies so blindingly?
It will make little dresses and coats,

It will cover a dynasty.
How her body opens and shuts --
A Swiss watch, jeweled in the hinges!

O heart, such disorganization!
The stars are flashing like terrible numerals.
ABC, her eyelids say.

I

What new element before us unborn in nature? Is there
        a new thing under the Sun?
At last inquisitive Whitman a modern epic, detonative,
        Scientific theme
First penned unmindful by Doctor Seaborg with poison-
        ous hand, named for Death's planet through the
        sea beyond Uranus
whose chthonic ore fathers this magma-teared Lord of
        Hades, Sire of avenging Furies, billionaire Hell-
        King worshipped once
with black sheep throats cut, priests's face averted from
        underground mysteries in single temple at Eleusis,
Spring-green Persephone nuptialed to his inevitable
        Shade, Demeter mother of asphodel weeping dew,
her daughter stored in salty caverns under white snow,
        black hail, grey winter rain or Polar ice, immemor-
        able seasons before
Fish flew in Heaven, before a Ram died by the starry
        bush, before the Bull stamped sky and earth
or Twins inscribed their memories in clay or Crab'd
        flood
washed memory from the skull, or Lion sniffed the
        lilac breeze in Eden--
Before the Great Year began turning its twelve signs,
        ere constellations wheeled for twenty-four thousand
        sunny years
slowly round their axis in Sagittarius, one hundred
        sixty-seven thousand times returning to this night

Radioactive Nemesis were you there at the beginning
        black dumb tongueless unsmelling blast of Disil-
        lusion?
I manifest your Baptismal Word after four billion years
I guess your birthday in Earthling Night, I salute your
        dreadful presence last majestic as the Gods,
Sabaot, Jehova, Astapheus, Adonaeus, Elohim, Iao,
        Ialdabaoth, Aeon from Aeon born ignorant in an
        Abyss of Light,
Sophia's reflections glittering thoughtful galaxies, whirl-
        pools of starspume silver-thin as hairs of Einstein!
Father Whitman I celebrate a matter that renders Self
        oblivion!
Grand Subject that annihilates inky hands & pages'
        prayers, old orators' inspired Immortalities,
I begin your chant, openmouthed exhaling into spacious
        sky over silent mills at Hanford, Savannah River,
        Rocky Flats, Pantex, Burlington, Albuquerque
I yell thru Washington, South Carolina, Colorado,
        Texas, Iowa, New Mexico,
Where nuclear reactors creat a new Thing under the
        Sun, where Rockwell war-plants fabricate this death
        stuff trigger in nitrogen baths,
Hanger-Silas Mason assembles the terrified weapon
        secret by ten thousands, & where Manzano Moun-
        tain boasts to store
its dreadful decay through two hundred forty millenia
        while our Galaxy spirals around its nebulous core.
I enter your secret places with my mind, I speak with
        your presence, I roar your Lion Roar with mortal
        mouth.
One microgram inspired to one lung, ten pounds of
        heavy metal dust adrift slow motion over grey
        Alps
the breadth of the planet, how long before your radiance
        speeds blight and death to sentient beings?
Enter my body or not I carol my spirit inside you,
        Unnaproachable Weight,
O heavy heavy Element awakened I vocalize your con-
        sciousness to six worlds
I chant your absolute Vanity.  Yeah monster of Anger
        birthed in fear O most
Ignorant matter ever created unnatural to Earth! Delusion
        of metal empires!
Destroyer of lying Scientists! Devourer of covetous
        Generals, Incinerator of Armies & Melter of Wars!
Judgement of judgements, Divine Wind over vengeful
        nations, Molester of Presidents, Death-Scandal of
        Capital politics! Ah civilizations stupidly indus-
        trious!
Canker-Hex on multitudes learned or illiterate! Manu-
        factured Spectre of human reason! O solidified
        imago of practicioner in Black Arts
I dare your reality, I challenge your very being! I
        publish your cause and effect!
I turn the wheel of Mind on your three hundred tons!
        Your name enters mankind's ear! I embody your
        ultimate powers!
My oratory advances on your vaunted Mystery! This
        breath dispels your braggart fears! I sing your
        form at last
behind your concrete & iron walls inside your fortress
        of rubber & translucent silicon shields in filtered
        cabinets and baths of lathe oil,
My voice resounds through robot glove boxes & ignot
        cans and echoes in electric vaults inert of atmo-
        sphere,
I enter with spirit out loud into your fuel rod drums
        underground on soundless thrones and beds of
        lead
O density! This weightless anthem trumpets transcendent
        through hidden chambers and breaks through
        iron doors into the Infernal Room!
Over your dreadful vibration this measured harmony        
        floats audible, these jubilant tones are honey and
        milk and wine-sweet water
Poured on the stone black floor, these syllables are
        barley groats I scatter on the Reactor's core,
I call your name with hollow vowels, I psalm your Fate
        close by, my breath near deathless ever at your
        side
to Spell your destiny, I set this verse prophetic on your
        mausoleum walls to seal you up Eternally with
        Diamond Truth!  O doomed Plutonium.

                        II

The Bar surveys Plutonian history from midnight
        lit with Mercury Vapor streetlamps till in dawn's
        early light
he contemplates a tranquil politic spaced out between
        Nations' thought-forms proliferating bureaucratic
& horrific arm'd, Satanic industries projected sudden
        with Five Hundred Billion Dollar Strength
around the world same time this text is set in Boulder,
        Colorado before front range of Rocky Mountains
twelve miles north of Rocky Flats Nuclear Facility in
        United States of North America, Western Hemi-
        sphere
of planet Earth six months and fourteen days around
        our Solar System in a Spiral Galaxy
the local year after Dominion of the last God nineteen
        hundred seventy eight
Completed as yellow hazed dawn clouds brighten East,
        Denver city white below
Blue sky transparent rising empty deep & spacious to a
        morning star high over the balcony
above some autos sat with wheels to curb downhill
        from Flatiron's jagged pine ridge,
sunlit mountain meadows sloped to rust-red sandstone
        cliffs above brick townhouse roofs
as sparrows waked whistling through Marine Street's
        summer green leafed trees.

                        III
                        
This ode to you O Poets and Orators to come, you
        father Whitman as I join your side, you Congress
        and American people,
you present meditators, spiritual friends & teachers,
        you O Master of the Diamond Arts,
Take this wheel of syllables in hand, these vowels and
        consonants to breath's end
take this inhalation of black poison to your heart, breath
        out this blessing from your breast on our creation
forests cities oceans deserts rocky flats and mountains
        in the Ten Directions pacify with exhalation,
enrich this Plutonian Ode to explode its empty thunder
        through earthen thought-worlds
Magnetize this howl with heartless compassion, destroy
        this mountain of Plutonium with ordinary mind
        and body speech,
thus empower this Mind-guard spirit gone out, gone
        out, gone beyond, gone beyond me, Wake space,
        so Ah!
        
                                        July 14, 1978

Gemini in seasonable  evening,
serenely swirling in Septemberous
ferris wheels
reeling in the vast domain
of lonesome leviathans
and witch-fires;
nowhere bound in the boundless fecundity
[ the feral joys of creation... ]
twins
meander in gravity's
well of souls,
swollen with unknowns and proteins;
golden rods in pointless foam
brewing the elixir vitae
in the Dippers cup. the Milky Way,
a wayward gush
from an ancient Mother Goddess,
plump and shameless, pumping teats
to nurse worlds
infused with divine rays of gamma and x...
why set dark apart
from firmament burning
spheres?

dragons
must clutch eggs in the void
as much
as fork tongue white dwarfs.
of course, the Source
unfolds
as  Love does. it's purpose,
in thrall of fearless veracity,
spinning yarns for glad garments
to clothe the naked dread
of such fearful symmetries
as roam the wild delights
of the infinite
meringue.

the Pi
on the window sill,
tempting the circular frame of reference
to square with the sublime Will.
another Fibonacci in your
bedpost,
to better hobnob with
broomsticks.
everything annihilates hatred.
from within,
we sojourn to sovereign super-continents
of opulent peace.
profound realities surge serpentine
with Meaning.
we are outdone on the inside by small minds
and farcical
hearts.

so at night
look up.

Love's Tongue Is
Love's
Word.

Sometimes one has to face the Chimera
Attacked from all sides with lethal intensity
Fighting an imaginary demon, a solitary war
Either, one will emerge a winner, or demonized
Tame the Chimera, before it annihilates

Like the sun,
she brightens up my day
Always there, never far away
Like Mercury,
She’s scorched with beauty
A dazzling image for all to see
Like Venus,
A goddess in my mind
A divine gift for all mankind
Like Earth,
Her heart is where I make my home
An aura so real, I never feel alone
Like Mars,
Her hair, it runs with red
she annihilates any tear I shed
Like Jupiter,
She has the largest heart
She herself: a work of art
Like Saturn,
Beauty surrounds her like a ring
So light and divine, almost floating
Like Uranus,
She goes against the grain
Free from the world, she breaks the chain
Like Neptune,
Her passion rages like the wind
she sets out like a storm to rescind
Like Pluto,                  
So distant but never forgotten
Dancing for eternity around the sun

SHIVA
(Bijoylakshmi Das)
The silence of night scares you
With its eerie thoughts
Ever azar with doors wide open
To give vent to unrestrained dreams,
Never letting you to rise above
The mundane laws of existence.
Do you ever think of SHIVA
The eternal principle of the Sublime?
Sitting alone on the peaks of the Himalayan silence,
Speaking to you in His divine muse-
Of ineffable ecstasy.
The body is not all.
That obeys the physical laws,
The mind is not all.
That listens to odd yearnings.
And the spirit too is not your limit.
You have to go beyond
Far beyond life's petty limitations
To reach Truth, Consciousness and Bliss.
SHIVA, the enlightened.
Which translates human dialects
Into an indefinable divine hieroglyphic.
SHIVA, the Supreme
Creates the Universe,
Rules it too,
Annihilates when Harmony loses its identity.
The universal principle of Love
Gets bewildered in empirical rules of earthly existence,
And Spirit fails to rise above,
SHIVA opens His Third Eye,
In its piercing gaze
All lights fade and
The fugitive human mind finds no sojourn
He warns you.
Arise, awake
To reach your goal
Beyond the earthly ken.
(Bijoylakshmi Das Haridwar)

Sanded down,
handed down
heirlooms
for boardrooms.

Directors prospecting for
antique positions,
commission based,
cyanide laced contracts,
small print that annihilates,
dilating the pupils ,restrictive
and
pencils that scribble out names in
a ledger.

Forever indebted,
a debit individual.
All residual profit
reinvested,
future proofed
heirlooms.

all eyes,
all on me,
all eyes,
hanging
all over me.

milk the silence.

fingertips trace the
splintered podium.

clear my throat,
once,
twice.

"We shoulduh' seen this coming."

great opener.

"Our end was scored
by symphonies of sitcoms,
reality television, coffeehouse blenders,
and fanatical braking.

Our pride in resilience was the
spark that lit the powder keg.

Foreigners couldn't stop us,
for we stopped letting 'em in years ago.

Time couldn't stop us,
for our bodies are made of plastic,

and words don't dent us,
for our emotions are backed by
the most stubborn of metals.

We broke love when we were still young.
All us boys were aiming for quick fixes,
and all you girls were aiming for margarita mixes.
Ladies decided they wanted to nest around the
smoking age,
and if they were attractive enough,
us boys bit.

We all got divorced.

We all got into politics.

Some of us died for a country,
but none of us are sure why.

Some of us ran from debt,
some recorded folk songs on laptops,
some sexed their way out,
some drank themselves to death.

We shoulduh' seen this coming.

But we didn't, so that makes you and I, the idiots.

The smart ones had foresight,
and departed us early.

Now we idiots look to the murderous sky,
and wait."

all eyes,
all on me,
all eyes,
hanging
all over me.

milk the silence.

i raise my arms up,
as though the crowd is crucifying me.

they want to finish their burgers.
they want to stroke each other's egos.
they want to pass the blame on some
distant land,
and stick boots up ***** and wave a few flags.

"So civilization doesn't get to rust,
it goes out in a flash and is carried away as dust.

Mankind annihilates itself in a fit of boredom.

Get stoked for the funeral pyre."

all eyes,
all on the ground.
all skin,
all plastic skin did melt.
all forgotten dreams,
all torn from hidden seams.
all the thin, the fat, the republican, the democrat,
all the white, the black, the chinese,
the arabs, the jews, the druggies,
the christians, the monkeys, mtv stars,
toilet seats, pamphlets,
all the newsreels, dvds,
collector's editions, suvs,
all fuse together,
all in one immaculate heat.

no one even got a chance to applaud.

Sacred Ground

Space a dimension it is the ancient days converging and a priest with agelessness holds your stare

He looks beyond all artifice he scrutinizes thoughts where they come from where they are going
Your mind feels the fire it is all consuming it burns all impurities waste is hunted and pure blue fire

Annihilates this reprobate that was born when time began it has robbed all of true consequence
It finds only holy flame in this your most sacred place the priest moves with purpose into every corner

He carries the thurible filled with incense it permutes all nothing does it miss it represents ancestral
Wholeness you are indivisible with your mortal forbears this collection of prayers and thoughts  

Bespangles earths dark night arrest visions left by unseen visitors they open to you as the secretive
And as rare as the ghost orchid it only blooms at night it is impossible to find but here they grow

Profusely in this hideaway where temperate air breathes its mixed wisdom from the fount of
Creation here is where you further order make laws that are unbreakable and no one dares to trespass

The sanctity of the soul is impossible to breach by oath of death you have sworn to keep it pure
The place where you kneel for Holy rites like God’s holy mountain continually smoked from his presence

Here the foot hills are vestured by the spirit that gives you life beyond earths short span crowned in
Glory robed in righteousness not one speck that would mark you as unclean oh Holy fountain feed

Your waters into my sacred ground make them rise and then shower this place that spiritual fruit
Grow without end while I occupy this contrivance of flesh let them cascade down from the high rocks

A water fall to cleanse me from all evil not just it realness but its very appearance to thee I have bowed
And have forswear allegiance to you forever may my commitment be made stronger in these Holy

Waters enough to sway the souls of men and women who suffer pain and sorrow to follow thy word to
Their Sacred place where the gifts of heaven materialize as they commonly do in Heaven if such things

Can ever be called common here we have harnessed ancient ways brought it as quarried stone we have
Carried across centuries to build our castle that bears you Holy name and blazes throughout the

Darkened lost world so all can find relief under heady tides that seethe with untold blessing as well
As the natural sea.

This writing attests that God hears when we cry out for divine assistance to help others I parked by
Sacred ground that Sunday night it was where my grandmother lived and prayed and fasted sixteen

Days so this Town could have a church it started on her front porch now we must go to the harvest field
With new Zeal time is short do today what is needed tomorrow isn’t promised

she annihilates me
within somber streams
of her eyes,
unclothing my resolve
layer after layer
laying bare my
want to taste
the flesh
of all life's sorrow;
licking the wounds
of her heart
as her elixir'd
brine drips, whetting
my penchant;
to suckle her
pain from
weary limbs,
collapsing
at her feet
as life forces
drain my essence;
awakening
slumbered state
of mind, I lean
into her silence
behind enshrouded
eyes; awaiting
in naked liberation,
unleashing imbibed
shyness that existed
within; as she gazes
upon me, acknowledging
my very existence
in her realm; to whisper
against me without
verbalizing her thoughts;
watching her evolution,
I sigh, gasping inwardly,
as if, she is newborn
from wombed
catacomb; a new day
emerging from
cocooned silence,
erupting into wanton
unabashed passion
as cognizant open-mouth
gazes unleash
untithered moans
of release;
no longer mourning
sorrow's, fore, new
tomorrow's has arisen

We are the forsaken
God's forgotten you
Yet you stand, still unshaken
Revelations seen untrue
We are the world's demise
Ride the waves of pestilence
First born sons - the devil's prize
The Sun explodes and annihilates existence
We walk in the darkness of the end
Her blood is written on the walls
Struck by plague, she can't defend
Take your breath as you're pushed from the falls
We have no sympathy; no remorse
The apocalypse will take its course

It's kind of
strange
how a simple 'hi'
from you
brightens
my entire day.
It's kind of
scary
how a single word,
a single syllable
holds that
much power
over me.
And just as your 'hi'
means the
entire *******  world
to me,
your 'bye'
annihilates
everything alive
inside of me.

My sad mentality
Destroys my reality
Annihilates my honesty
All I have got is privacy
Not a shed of sociality
My life's complexity
Against myself a conspiracy
Emphasizes my stupidity
Locks up my humanity
Self pity is my speciality
It seems a necessity
Which confuses my phsychology
And Leaves nothing I wanna be


My life's history
I have waited patiently
To write in my corrupting diary
For I am no deity
If there was something godly
I'd have been killed furiously
That conclusion comes logically
Though simultaneously
I have lived happily
My neurology
I have kept in secrecy
Cause with my souls delivery
To the devils cookery
They feasted immediately
On my souls purity
My life's mystery
Won't be uncovered easily
For I life silently
In my ****** up fantasy
Which left nothing I wanna be

I have waited impatiently
For others to grow up with me
For without being remotely angelically
I have behaved, we'll almost elderly
Or I have tried to behave intelligently
Never drunkingly
And quite rarely
Entirely freely
On this I look quite positively
For it has allowed me
To stand against the waves unwaveringly
Looking upon life much more detailedly
Seeing more nuanced on life's complexity
And for the ability to do this comfortably
I must thank my family
While I can say all the above truthfully
There is plenty to say negatively
For standing against the norm unrockingly
Can at the best of times be quite lonely
And most the time I looked desperately
After those who floated by me oh so freely
While looking so unfathomably
Completely, worryingly, unanimously happily
At a world driven by the greedy,
Disgustingly, horrifying monsters of humanity
This have tortured me existentially
At times I have felt ****** up mentally
But as time passed slowly
Step by step I realized surprisingly
That it has left me allmost exactly like I allways wanted to be.

Everything is ruined.
The plan, the plans.
Every ******* thing is torn
Shredded. The hand is poison,
The mouth is a gate that never shuts.
The body, the mind,
A mismatched pair. Utterly senseless.

I’m a hypocrite when I do this.
But then again I might just be fickle.
They call it changing minds,
With the hypocrisy riding on it
Like a wave, up to a froth-filled
Bang on the sandy shore.

The smell of salt annihilates.
I do not wish to live for this.

There, I’ve said it. I’ve sent the
Package to you like I told my head
I would not.

Crumble, crumble oh Pliny.
Vesuvius’s wrath spews here again.
Choking us with its mountain of black ash,
Rushing towards us like a news in hurry.
Salvaging our bones among the ruins of Herculaneum.
We, the organic, getting eaten for centuries.

Shalini Nayar
© 2004

Why do bad things happen?"
“Why does evil exist?”
“Why is the world becoming more sinful everyday?”
These are questions that are asked on a regular basis and it is proven that no answer is perfect enough to respond with. It is healthy to question the sadism on earth and it is normal to be concerned about all of the evil that took and is taking place in history. But a question that is asked very seldom today is, “why do good things happen?”
I think cancer is the most talked about killer in all of the world. It’s murderous, it’s dreadful, and unfortunately, there is no way to stop it. Humans do not have control over some bad things, like cancer. We physically cannot stop the spreading of diseases in a moment’s notice like how we would like to. Bad things WILL happen and some of those things will be out of our control.
Take thunderstorms, for example. We cannot physically halt the demolition of a thunderstorm and we have no control over what it annihilates. But, the one thing we can control is our reaction. Humans can control reactions. Do we rush for shelter? Do we pretend that its power to destroy every fabric of the city is nonexistent? Do we panic? Do we hide our loved ones first? We control the answers to these questions.
The beauty of life falls under the definition of a storm passing. The bad things are temporary. The bad things will always pass and once they do, it leaves another muscle in our hearts. Every lightning strike, every roar of thunder, every gray cloud, and every rainy day prepares us for the next storm. Our reaction to the eradication will be much more courageous than our last. Maybe we’ll know a quicker route to shelter. Maybe we’ll think in a greater sense of serenity. Maybe we’ll know a better position to be in, in order for the storm to not hurt us. The second time around we will take more advantage of what we can do to allay the storms in our lives. The bad things in life will always promise strength.
"Why do the good things happen?" is a question that is very rarely asked.
And well, good things happen because they are supposed to.
It was never God’s intention to make a world that consisted of bad. It was never in His heart to have sin enter the world because good always originates from the source of God. Goodness is God and Love is God, as well. And since Love is God, He gives us the choice to do whatever is in our will. If we love someone, we will not program them into robots, where we control every move they make. If we love someone, we will give them the freedom to perform any action they would like. So when man decided to bring sin in the world, God did not stop it from happening because He loved man so much that He was compelled to let him do whatever man wanted. Before man’s decision to sin, God made sure the world was spotless. But since His love gives us a choice, we chose to bring sin in the world.
Bad things happen because it was chosen by us to let them happen. Sometimes, we cannot control the bad things in the world but we can control our reactions. The downsides in life will never fail to be a life lesson, will never fail to soften our hearts if they need to be a softened and toughen our hearts if they need to be toughened. There is no telling when a bad thing will occur and we are allowed to acknowledge its jeopardy. But, the second time around, we will be prepared. The bad times only strengthen us.

I wish
revenge
stays for his vacation
and annihilates
fear of desire
to forgive

Infinitesimal,
we stand beneath the sun
of a gargantuan world.

Heart is born in a locked cage of bone.
Prisoner to it's rabid desire not to be alone.
Love is the crux in what feels like emotional infinities of searching.
Pure unconditional love annihilates doubt's obsessive lurking.

Grains we are, yet with heart's that extend so vast and far.
Reading sacred eternity in the shimmering language of the stars.
For every yearn, the epic answer is love.

It’s common knowledge that nobody dies of AIDS,
it’s the common cold or bronchitis or some other infection
that annihilates the broken immune system.
Alternatively, people with AIDS die
of suicide.
I didn’t even consider suicide an option
until you bolted your front door twice
and strung your neck up with a rainbow silk tie.

I don’t have AIDS,
I don’t even have the common cold or bronchitis,
but I do have a long gold cord under my bed
coiled up like a snake curling around its own head.
I do not want to die today, but I checked tomorrow’s forecast
and it sounds like the perfect day
for my madness to burst outward in hot yellow rays
as I choke on my own grey spit
and fatal sins.

The collateral fiction of Waves
The sounds of echoes scream as I strained by my body by the beat of the music  
Tears pouring down on my  makeup
You can hold me down if you want to
I don't really mind 'cause I'd like to
Feel love, how it hurts,
Guillotined of principles killing my subconscious thoughts of the injustice
When we cling on each other bodies doesn't matter the weather changes on over the collide of pauses
And I was writing poetry about you every day
And yeah, I know that things
They never tend to stay the same
But I don't think you love me and it kills me every day
Burned out by the red cuff of over lining shine
The word we're unimaginable
By the colorful pigments of fools
Like the collision of her blames that blinds her before she flies higher than the stars
Blink of the moon and the perpendicular crimination of crimson cream
Bloom all over the sky of orange and blue
The sense of unhappiness is so much easier to convey than that of happiness. In misery we seem aware of our own existence, even though it may be in the form of a monstrous egotism: this pain of mine is individual, this nerve that winces belongs to me and to no other. But happiness annihilates us: we lose our identity
What was she supposed to feel
What was she supposed to do
In the different universe, how was her story gonna end
So many victims tattered her eager thoughts
It is better to lock up your heart with a merciless padlock than to fall in love with someone who doesn't know what they mean to you.
Let her sin away her thought of us
Let her devils ruin her soul and peace of mind
Pictures of her burns alive as the wave take her away