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the halls are filled with
awkward jawlines,
the smell of cigarette smoke
and strong perfume used by the
girls with blue eye shadow,
"hurry up!"
"ew who are you?"
"*** did u see what shes wearing?"
the noisy classroom seems to
just stare judging everyone in
its path,
"im sorry okay im just trying to fit in"
"that's the problem your not trying hard
enough"
you see i don't like school, but hey
who doesn't but my reasons a
little bit different, i want to
study, learn some new math but
can i take out these disgusting
judgmental people and maybe
i'd start liking school.
h.d.
Cold sweats and cuss words
Body weakened and defeated
To long for something that you dont want
To desire a quick death
My head, rings louder than a mobile phone during sunday service.
Stress seriously stirs within my day.
My will disintergrating litte by little,
I will fall
But I refused to break
Everyday, every step, every breath
a test against my myself
I wont give in,
I wont give up.
i'm sorry i cried
the first time
you  called me
beautiful.
it's just,
everyone that's called
me that
leaves.
honestly,
i dont give a ****
if you think
i'm beautiful.
all i'm asking
is that you
stay.
Crossroads that crisscross my mind
they say, "find the right way"
but I'm stuck where they left me.
Without a notion of
North, South, East or West.
No compass
to tell me which way best.
I want to go in every direction,
wander into new wonders,
but that's not allowed.
I want to shout out loud
for someone to set me straight,
save me from choice and regret,
but I'd only strain my voice
and remain at the crossroads.
I must be in Purgatory.
So I wonder
which way to Heaven
and which way to Hell.
Not that it would matter.
As either
must be better than this limbo.
This nothingness.
It's worthless.
Meaningless,
until I take that first step.
Dust of the cobwebs.
Feel a gust of wind,
ebb and flow.
And begin.
comments/criticism welcomed
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