so
let’s talk,
old friend.

what is it
that you want to say
to little old me?

I’m not good enough?
you don’t trust me?
I’m not sure that’s my fault.

I admit there were
issues with our ship,
but I didn’t wreck it.

here we sit
old friend,
on this deserted island.

each searching for
something the other
just can’t provide.

I’m going to get up and run
to the arms of my
Strong Rescuer.

while you sit in the sand,
and continue to cry because
no one will save you.

I’m truly sorry
that things didn’t
go so well.

but here’s the thing,
I’m making my way
off this island.

you won’t come with me
so I’ll have to leave you behind,
but you have to at least try.

I’ll see you again sometime
in the future, once you have
let your feet lead you to the Rescuer.  

for now,
goodbye
old friend.

Writing is my therapy.
I find it far easier to write
Away my demons into chains
Than to let their free verse reign.

I dare not sit in that chair
To face the things near or far
The cold and the heavy
The antiques of my persistent soul.

Though in time, when farther I succumb
Perhaps, I'll find that existential door,
One which takes me to the place, I need
To restore whats so lost within.

And true, I write the walls which hold me,
But better a prisoner of my own making,
Then be held hostage by an unstable mind.
Control, power, hold on, until you can't.

thundering feelings,
tightening in my chest;
heart booming.
lightning,
the electric current,
the beautiful storm in
your blue-green eyes.
the curled lips,
like rose petals.
the crinkled corners,
with small folds;
i'd never imagine
could bring so much joy.
my face
in your careful,
cupped hands;
you tell me the words,
"you are so beautiful".
i am wax;
i melt by your body heat.
inside and exhausted
i love you's,
i can't wait to
see the world with you's
i need you's
i want you's.
never in my life
do i want to lose you's.
gentle fingers
down my neck,
shudders sent
down my spine.
i see you.
i see through you,
your vessel,
to your spirit.
the one intertwined
with mine.
you,
please me,
tease me,
appease me,
my love,
please never leave me.

i envy the cars that end up driving south.
the streetlights are tempting,
and blurred buildings tell me
“there’s other ways out”.
a handful of exit plans,
and empty destinations,
that i am reminded once again
in this world it is truly every man for themselves.
because if it were different
silence wouldn’t be my only company,
as i drive absentmindedly
hating every exit sign i see.

maybe the thought of having nowhere to go
is more humble
than the thought of having no one to give you a place to be.

do you still love me
do you still love m
do you still love
do you still lov
do you still lo
do you still l
do you still
do you stil
do you sti
do you st
do you s
do you
do yo
do y
do
d
di
did
did y
did yo
did you
did you e
did you ev
did you eve
did you ever
did you ever l
did you ever lo
did you ever lov
did you ever love
did you ever love m
did you ever love me

am i broken or wrong
for mistakes can be erased
but jagged ends can only impale

am i forgotton or missed
is your silence in memory of fondness
or have i disappeared from the caves of your mind

am i dangerous or unsafe
do you worry that my grasps of love will tumble you over the edge
or do you fear that i do not see the daggers i have for teeth

am i something you fear
or does the thought of something with me chill you to your bones