I remember the first time I met her
It was like that first breath of air
I’m the middle of a stark winter
Where the security of your lungs is stolen
Quickened glances from strangers
Maddeningly caught in a room together
There wasn’t anything too special honestly
She was as powerful and savage
As most women are
For she didn’t even notice me
As her mind is always on the pursuit
Of happiness and self love

She’s the kind of girl
Who makes you
Want to chase fireflies
In the dead of winter.

Their last argument
She tried her hardest to explain
That there’s places he seems to go
Where she just can’t follow
As she refuses to live within sorrows
His only reply was
“We’ll see if we can survive tomorrow.”

Do you think years from now
This old town will still call us family?
Cause’ I remember what you said
Let’s not lose our heads
And I’m moving fast
You’re holding slow
Leading the way
Learning to swing and sway
Every move is so dramatic and erratic
The gleam in your eyes has me fanatic
Always there and never giving up on me
My own personal therapy
Dancing under her starlit canopy
It’s so hard to see
The future is blinding me
How will this end for me? I can only imagine quite tremendously
Could I convince you?
Let’s do all the things we’re were not suppose too
Let me see a different view of all the carnal sides of you
Meet me at the twenty-fourth floor somewhere on the roof
Whisper pretty fictitious truths
Let our first dance a top the world be for the world to see
It’s just you and me

You don't have to run away with me
I could never ask you to change a thing
Just want to catch one last wave with you
Before the tide drags us out to the deep
So, do you wanna go for a ride with me?
We'll change everything
Show em' we'll make some waves
Cause' I feel like drowning in you far out in the deep

We need it, we chase it
Face it, you want it, you crave it
Believe when I say that you'll know once you taste it
Look what we've done
Before you gave me your words, take mine and run
Before long, you'll move on, and I'll be too far gone
Cause' I ain't got patience to slow down the chase
We'll need some space
To realize I'm not quite like other guys
Heart on your sleeve like you've never been loved
Your friends are in the back waiting for us to move on
Guess you could say we've been here to long

The story of the gorgeous mermaid
Addicted to self abuse
As she could watch the ocean waves
Pink littered oranges in the back drop sky
Yet, she still craves
To be worlds away
With a boy who doesn’t want her back

I think I have a ghost that follows me
They’re a shape shifting trickster devil
Playing tricks on me
Cause’ I see you everywhere I go
Hear my name called
Lost in the seas of people
Echoing with sweet delicacies
I thought I found a lover at twenty three
Almost was the death of me
For I tripped and fell
Found myself in the depths of hell
Can’t remember where we’ve been
Traveled on the wind
I met your ghost
It whispered in sweet delicacies
Lathered in sins
Let you go
Just seems the words
Got stuck in my throat

With all the selfish things we’ve done
I hate that I don’t hate you
Although, I love that I don’t love you
No matter all the things we’ve done

She told me I had golden eyes
Except lately they just don’t get her high
That must be the reason why
When I look into my own eyes
Love seems to die
It’s a really long process learning to fly

I’ve never been good with religion
It’s a damning personal decision
Even then I find myself on my knees
Begging you please
This world has glimmers of hope
They’re all that allow me to cope
To be honest, I shouldn’t be here today
It’s a moment I’ve learned to replay
Every day, in my mind it’s the only way
For I am a sinner and you’re a saint
Lost for words and only images to paint
I wanted to dance in the chemical rains
But, they never came
You were dancing with the sun
I guess I’m just not that fun

The taste of the alcohol in your small sips
Wiped away my chapped lips
Arguing for innocence
Both guilty as eachother on our sins
Both creatures we know oh so well
We were warm until we went to hell
Can you tell me how this downfall began?
Cause, I know we didn’t have a plan
How long can we make this last?
Let’s play a game and pretend we don’t have a past

Your love like tendencies
Are no reassurance
For the damage is done
And when she learns
To never look bsck
You’ll truly know
Self hate

We were both scared to outgrow one another
We vowed
To uproot mountains
Paint the sun black
Swim in hell's fires
Make deals with angels and devils alike
For just moments next to one another
Growing seems to be such a curse and a blessing
At least we agree of growing together
Those are our vows to eachother
Till the rivers run dry
And the suns firestorms scorch us
When the earth breathe's anew
We're burdened and burning
I just wouldn't want to burn for anyone, but you

Let’s find ourselves lost on backroads
Star searching for lost love
Interlocked fingers upon shooting stars
Kisses remembered for years passed
Let’s just forget tonight
That I am me
And
You are you
Let’s just do what lovers do

What if I outgrow you he asked
I’ll run the rivers dry
Drink the firestorm scorches
Paint the sun black
Destroy the moon for the ocean tides
Plant new forest for the earth to breathe
Burdened and burning
I’ll make deals with angels
Vanquish demons
For just a moment by your side
For growing is a blessing
But, you’re a curse that I need

What if I outgrow you she asked
I’ll uproot mountains
Part oceans
Reach the outter limits of space
Swim in hell’s fires
Make deals with devils
**** angels
I’ll burn
For growing is a curse
But, you are such a blessing

All a little lost when it's over
You're reciting heartbreak philosophies in the shower
Alone I'm walking through the beautiful flowers
I think I might just take off for a while
Cause' tonight we're freezing
Everything that you wanted, was everything I needed
I'm sorry for last weekend
It'll be quite the shock realizing you don't need me
You'll be wondering how you're losing sleep
No matter where your soul is
I hope you won't try to fight these feelings every night
You still have every right
To breathe
I didn't know you were golden
Till I tore your heart open

The less happy I am
The more you all see
I’m not sure I’m meant for this
Never got caught up in drugs or liquor
Pretty words though, they control every breath I breathe
Wonder if this is a dream, I swear it is
Now a days I rarely talk to God
Only call you up when I need you
Not really sure what you’re asking of me
But, I’m the man I think I want to be
Double down on the family tree
I’m just trying to do right by the way my mom and sister raised me to be

She has no idea, begging for help as I bleed her dry
She doesn't know the transfusion comes from my mind
Body and Soul giving her life, some trick for a trickster
Lately our communications been off
Both deemed unworthy in the eyes of lovers
The depths of hell calling our names
Let's breathe out and breathe in
Fill our forgotten lungs
With timeless seams of winter
You just couldn’t help drifting
Like the love the leaf craves the cracked cement
Asked me to let go, and my stress seem to let go
It’s a hard feeling knowing the truth will hurt and the regret will sting
So, we’ll just let it float

She asked why I'm addicted to solitude
Do I truly need it?
I beg to plead the fifth
Bargaining with lost lay of the lands
Wishing to be lost
Sunsets in streetlights
Certain beauties in midnights
In the late hours
You start to remember what we call ours
Learning it's okay to fall
Sometimes it's not for love,
For the mind craves heavy drugs
And some pursue trust, while after lust
I'm stuck with pride

Losing track to your master plan
Drowning again on oxygen
Take me back to when I was ten
Ask a younger me to describe what love feels like again
Cause fourteen years later and I swear it's just a life killing carcinogen
Love is just a bad acronym

It's a drop dead lifestyle
Making a change here and there
Just too revert back to the same way
Lost in bad habits
For when love leaves you
The alcohol calls your name
And carefree feelings seem inviting
Can't fool yourself though
If there's one thing that you know
You're stuck in repetitions
Maybe it's just your nature
Regardless it's hard watching you do this to yourself

You
And
I
We just never could catch eachother
At the right time
Could we?

She had irrational fear
That no one would love her again
Like you did
It was quite some time later
She woke before the sun
Snuggled up in a sweater
Sipping on coffee
Gazing out into the peaceful morning
As the faint greys came to light
She began to realize
She could

Oh, Love
You're poetic venom
Seeped all the way to my core
Corroding the sanity of my words
Plaguing the inescapable reality
That you're nothing more than that
Just words
Yet, you hold such power over me
Maybe if I was the stronger man
You'd be just a casual Friday night
No, to the hazel eyed boy
You're lifetimes

Trying to make something timeless
Begging to stay tireless
In the hour of devastations
Words and self representations
Fed up and I'm tired
Book isn't finished and I'm thinking of retiring
As I'm not sure when to stop and what you demand of me
Is my soul and mind the fee for you to be complete?
How far are we gonna go? There's only so many sides to me
So, dear reader which side do you wish to see?

To the hopeless dreamers
You pretty girls and handsome boys
Your "Me Too's" won't go unnoticed
I am sorry something was taken from you
That you'll never regain
That you should've had control of when you gave yourself to a lover
Just know that you're fearless
For in a world of doubt and hopelessness
You're pure hope
Shining bright amongst the night sky
A whole constellation grounded in earth
As you'll all shine on
Have hope
For your love is needed

Your mother's love and fathers care
Never teach you that the real monsters
Aren't under your bed, they're lying in it
Next to you
Unspoken blood oaths
Secrets carved into each others skin
Both in pain, but one to blame
Scott free and carefree
I wonder why only one of us
Got stuck being the demon in the dark
But, even demons have truthful lights

Found myself running down to the ocean stream
Neck deep in the swirls hoping you'd find me in a dream
For uncontrollable emotions teeming with heartache
I seem to be teeming with lovers lost fate
Oh, drown in your love
Take me away, to the shores of begotten memories
Where the sun scratched waves
Draw away at my brain
Festered and spliced happiness
Revolves all around just your lips
We were dancing gods
Lost in embracing melodies
Never growing old, free to do it on our own
Crept back to the place we belong
And we can play pretend
Just don't play house with me if love is absent
Looking to go back to when we were fine
Looking to go back, except this time I won't make you mine

I'd run to the far ends
To the heart of the volcanic oceans
Sacrificial loves, strangleholds
For, she knows me more than I care to admit
You're the only one to know how this gets worse
I'll rush to miss you one more day
Let's go far away
Hearts thrown out days before
Anger risen in boiled sea licked sympathies
Lover's born in times of shame, taught in time to be so tame

Run away to our special place
Counting stars in depths of space
Flashing in front of the nights
Open skies and wave crashed twilights
We've been strangers for a while
Lover's pleaded guilty on trial
It seems this time we've been deceived
To the norms of humanities disease
So, meet me back at the shore
We'll make it to the door
We can make it out of this drought
Watch our lives unfurl, running in circles
So, pull me in closer
Fight for our love, love riddled soldier
Can I breathe in your love?
Necessity that brings us above

How discerning we are
Wrapped in boundless wants
Love accused as a non-believer
Maybe something's wrong with us
Honestly, in these times
It's better to be asleep
Testaments to the born dreamers
Stark heart waves to the broken healers
Cause' we'll all find our place
Somewhere near home
Is where we'll find we need to be

From the sunset highs
To the moonglow lows
Hopefully you find
Yourself dancing in the star fire
Surrounded in firefly kisses
Deserving of better loves
Soft glances and softer whispers
December welcomed lips
Playful Summer eyes
Sacrificial smiles
This world isn't exactly
What your heart expected
Regardless, your constant demand
To be free
How refreshingly bound to empathy
I can't help, but be attracted to thee

Stubble and eyes worn
Just got in
You're pleasantries questioning my sins
Two wrongs never win
You claim you want to save me
I know you're frustrated
You know I feel the same
I'm stuck in the cold rain
Will you be my shelter?
Will you be my open arms?
Lost to my own devices
Patience just seems to wear you down
Sometimes I'm just so self righteous
It seems I'm indefinitely caught in the rain
This time I'm headed back to town
I know I can be saved
For I have a shelter
With welcoming open arms

How interesting is it
That the older generations
Don't understand
Our newer styles of music
For we live in heartless times
And simple electronics
Make our bodies feel alive
Feel something
Showing us that we're human
What they truly don't see
Is how we're addicted
To the highs and lows
Attempting to open doors that are closed
Begging for bitter sweets
We're all to young to feel this numb