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I always smile so I never have to be the center of attention,
I thought it went away but I think I'm finally getting used to it,
I always act like I'm okay,
Sometimes I almost believe it,
Its when I'm sitting alone,
And the only person I can lie to
Is myself,
When the lights are off and the door is closed,
Where I have nowhere to hide,
That's when the truth falls out,
That's when the tears slide down my face,
When its 12:00 AM,
The only thing to fear is the truth of how I really feel.
Darkness pervades; an empty whole.
Tears fill this broken bowl.
The nectar too salty to quench the thirst
A brutal reminder of what came first

A Blackness, a Void. God illuminated into being.
Beauty, Belief, Faith - a false way of Seeing.
The futile attempts to make the hole whole,
but it's Loneliness that resides in our Soul.

In every being sprung into existence
the Romantic effort of Man's resistance
is Love, hailed as the Cure.
But ask yourself, "Are you sure?".

At a life with Loneliness by our side
Love's importance becomes amplified.
But Love is just a wishful lie
it is Loneliness that embraces us as we die.
 Sep 2015 Vernon Waring
am i ee
bathed in the cool light of the moon,
my sweet puppyhead and me,

sit.

under the full soft light, 
her ray’s illuminating the yard,
the woods.

footsteps crunch drying leaves,
fox, deer or foe?

waning canopy,
boughs lighter each day.

fall, majestic, peaceful
dying for another year.

plants and creatures, 
taking refuge in the deep dark void
of mother earth,
of mother nature.

squirreling away tidbits for a late winter snack,
coats blooming, thickening.

such delight, 
each night,
sitting outside,
my puppyhead and me.

quiet and solitary,
no humans 
annoying me.

silent and still
only nocturnal creatures
meandering about.

what magic,
what sacredness.
what mystical delight.
never apart,
only the ONE.

such silly confusion,
thinking a person,
separate and small,
quaking with fear.

the big deep dark mystery
laughing and jovial,
always here,
here for us all.

open your eyes, 
feel your nature,
always here,
never apart.

fearing death
fearing life,
what a silly way to live this
life!

the moment you were born,
you began dying,
what a relief,
knowing the score!

relaxing into the madness,
laughing at it all,
pure and free,
forever more, 
and not……

being,
not being,
eons of reflection,
sages and rishis
revealing the truth,
it can’t be done for you,
only you can become 
that which you are….
that which you always were.

my sweet love, my sweet life,
my puppyhead and me,
sitting here in Fall.
~~~
in Tao, in the One, her darkenss, her mystery
listen -
hear no sound, feel
only wind on its way, ghostly
nothings, but hush to sharp wings
of ocean birds so fraying as they cut
the sky, shuttle to fairways, far aways,
in plaintive cries, i hear what they say,
sailing into the jeweled skylights, but i
am only weight of air, still on ground,
i mumble out, sidle the bone tides
that roll to land, grains of clarity,
i am mist and tear, a world
of hollow, i am that sound -
of ocean in a shell.
 Sep 2015 Vernon Waring
Melissa S
One pulls me down in a sea of tenderness
safe gentle lapping waves of love and comfort
so soothing like a warm summer pond in the south
He is my anchor

The other loves me like a wild forbidden passionate rush
an all consuming type of love, making the world disappear
clinging to a life raft in a turbulent sea
He is my storm

Enticing waters with the luminous waves that can tempt the dead from their bed. My soul longs for both. I cannot drift off to peaceful sleep until the waves of desire find their sweet release. A wondrous storm of love in a turbulent sea or a steadfast anchor that has taken hold on a part of me
 Sep 2015 Vernon Waring
AM
Epiphany
 Sep 2015 Vernon Waring
AM
They say the darkest hour
comes before the dawn
but I don't mind at all cause
you're able to cast a light
through the heat of our skin
when you're dreaming
right beside me
She found herself in moments,
in the cracks between the pavement,

staring at her moonlit reflection,
twisting the time left to her to perfection,

aged thirty & counting
clouds passing above,

she kissed a couple of frogs
one of them, a Mr Prince Jnr

20 years older, who she hoped
would leave her a fortune

instead, he left her out on the street
smashed up, in the soup kitchen she moaned

about his new, younger lover
getting angrier with every hit

then aimed a shiny gun
at him to prove her point but missed

one day a preacher came along
that showed her the error of her ways

' Come to him, our Lord, child' he said
& she did. People heard her sing gospel out in the street.

It turned out she had quite a voice
& this sweet gift did not go unnoticed

now she's a rich singer of great repute
a happy end you can't refute
Just a little somethin' I came up with.. set in the US of my imagination/ general impressions from  films/literature/popular culture etc... not based on any specific true stories but it makes a good yarn...as for the religious aspect of this, I don't mean to preach about religion, it was just necessary for the story. If you're familiar with Bertold Brecht. ' The Threepenny Opera', I was thinking of it when I wrote this too.
 Sep 2015 Vernon Waring
AM
My dear
your words are
still hanging
on the ceiling
*of my heart
Hello.
Enjoy.

I am a soup
tomato, preferably

especially savored
in the winter

with a pinch of Salt
or Pepper or a naughty dob of Cream

When I'm warmed up hot
I giggle,

tickled by bubbles
rising through me

In my can I prayed to the spoon
oh let the kingdom come

imagined soup
just flowing free

& then I flowed
& saw the Spoon

it came for me
I trembled in love

but now, I do not know where Soups go
for now I see only this darkness round me

will I be re-born
into something?

The pepper seemed to think
we are re-born into other beings

he was hoping to become
a butterfly

I hope he got
his wish.
I hope I haven't offended anyone with this poem or what I'm about to say. I wrote it because sometimes I think we cannot really know for sure what's round the corner, no matter whether we are atheist or religious. If we believe in an afterlife, we could find that there is an unknown afterlife after the afterlife, find that we're living through an afterlife designed according to another religion's beliefs rather than our own, or find that there's nothing. Or, if we believe in nothing, find that there is something. I guess we'll find out when the time comes.
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