I picked my poison blindfolded.
Fumbling like Jane Grey
at the execution block.
Grabbed the jar closest,
cool glass with death beneath.
It was the slowest.
Death by leeches,
who **** the spirit dry
and replace it
with lead.

You have Darkness within you,
let it out, embody it;
lest it embody you.

If you don't express it
on your terms,
it will consume you
on it's terms.

To seize control
or forgo control?
that is the question.

I don't wear black clothing (when I do)
because I think it'll make me fit in with 'cool' people,
I wear black because I like it.
I enjoy it. I think it's rad.

I don't wear black nail polish on my fingers and toes
because I think it's 'cool,' or that I want others to think so,
I put it on because I like the way it looks.
I like the chipping that happens;
I feel it's a microcosm of Time, itself.
Nail polish exemplifies Wabi and Sabi.

Besides, I have quite the affinity for black.

I don't wear black eyeliner (when I do)
because I think it makes me so metal,
or because I think I need makeup to look good,
I wear it because I enjoy the theatrics
and I like the way it makes me feel.

I don't have the style I do
because I want to associate with
Goths, Rockers, Steampunks or Metalheads;
I have the style I do
because I genuinely like the way it looks.
It just so happens that I get those labels
because people like to put people in boxes.

I don't do what I do
because I want others to notice and like me for it, if anything,
many others will simply mock and make fun of me for it,
but, ironically, much of that spite and disdain
merely fuels my relished rejection
of modern cultural normality and gender roles.

In times of identity crisis, how weird is it to self-identify?

I do what I do
because I like to do it,
because it makes me happy;
because everything is a way to express yourself,
if you only allow it to be such a medium,
if only you find things to use as such mediums.

I see it as Art for the body,
somewhat poetic and transient;
make of it what you will.

It's truly too bad
everyone misconstrues expression
based on their own psychology,
even me. I do it too, though I try not to:
I am not exempt from my own critiques;
I am, in fact, my closest frame of reference.

At the end of the day, though,
you just have to do what you like,
for people and words shall fade
but it is what you have within that stays.

You passed me a white lighter
and said, "here's to bad luck"

My favorite is one I requested on a morning in the summer when I went to the library too early and they weren't open yet, so I waiting in the parking lot and she was just barely waking up and I asked her for a photo and she said she was ugly cause it was morning and she wasn't ready at all, but I kept asking and so she did. She sent me a photo of her in bed, sleepy as hell and it is the best photo I've ever seen. The joy that photo brings me is immeasurable. It comes from a time when life was perfect, it comes from a perfect source, who I loved perfectly.

I would give anything to be with her.

You know you're in love
when you smell her in
your pillow and when
she laughs at the way
you now beg for
her to touch you
the way that
you touch
her.

You were asked "Who is the
man in the relationship?"
because apparently there has to be
a man...
But, you said "That's the point.
Nobody is the man."
I'm sure he smiled and
tilted his head to the side
because in reality
isn't the man
usually
dominant?

I remember as a kid
believing that the men
had all the rights whereas
the women had none at all.
But, now I see if you want the
relationship to work out, then
you must both agree that you are
equal in each others love.

I have found that maybe I am the
Dominant lover, but something she
may not realize is that my heart
beats for her and my hand reaches
for her. That my thoughts lead to her
and that my body only wishes to feel
her warmth beside me every day and night.

I may be dominant, but you'll always have superiority over my heart.

Some days
I am the cactus
On the windowsill
Sitting stiff
Ready for a fight
But all that I really want
Is some sunshine
And a friend
To share my day with