i dont have determined feelings i just feel these overwhelming complicated emotions and I don't feel how other people do I have to choose to feel that way I wish I was normalmi wish I had normal feelings

i know that i will never be the prettiest
or the funniest
or the smartest

i’ll never be the -est of anything
because the only thing i can ever be
is me

and for you that’s just not good enough.

listening to the rain
puts everything in perspective
everything seems to matter a little less
when you’re standing in a rainstorm


it’s both quiet and loud
an interesting mix of lack and presence of sound
wind in my hair, clothes, on my face
i think this is why people believe in god

it’s very rare these days
to expirence something so raw
to realize
that we really matter nothing at all
that we are here, now
that we belong on earth

in this rainstorm

i let the weather soak my hair and my coat
running through the dark
my shoes barley touch the ground
i want to reach her
the rain
and tell her i finally believe in god

i think about her all the time and idk why we were at this museam for school and the fishtank reminded me of her because it was made of beautiful blues and plants and fish and shes complicated and beautiful like that and we went on the roof where there is a greenhouse and I wanted to stop and look at every flower because it reminded me of her they are all so pretty and shes so pretty and I've never thought about bone of my friends this much before maybe shes my best friend

take me back
the conductor of the wind
told me
go forth
but remember - look again
when you're not lonely
i'll shield you from them
until you can't see yourself
and neither can i

i am immune.

a blackened burn
white as mist
shattered bones learn
they resist
a swelled bruise
                   shifts

my mind
remains
               blind
to time's chains

Some dark stories never show the ending.