and even
the tiniest parts
of my body
ache and scream
calling out
your name

Stare into the abyss of nothing
But know
You will always be something

I hate you.
You push me around.
You mock me.
You say that it's only for my benefit.
Do I look alright to you?

You insult me.
To push me forward,
thinking I'll do just what you're asking for.
You say you love me.
Does love feel like this?

Does love feel, as if every single day.
I'm the one feeling guilty.
I'm the one who gets hurt.
I'm the one who has to keep trudging along,
on the sharp glass of your broken dream.

Must I walk the same ****** path that,
you so kindly laid out?
I don't care?
I keep pushing these feelings down.
Smiling, joking acting like it's normal.

You think you know me.
Do you know what I feel?
You feed me your pointy lies.
I can feel them, scratching my insides.

I bleed and slowly I unravel.

Please listen.
Listen to me

Even if you say you won't.
Even if you say you can't.

That poison
you direct at yourself
You don't deserve.

Those cuts,
Those scars you think no one sees
Are as bright as the moon on a clear evening.

They show your poison,
They show you screaming,
"I need someone
I need someone
To protect me
From myself
Because I've lost all control."

"I need a wall to lean on.
A shoulder to cry on.
An ear willing to listen."

I will be your ears,
And I will listen
To every single word
You are willing to pour out.

I will be your shoulder to cry on,
Your wall to lean on
when your poison overflows
and makes you weak.

I may not be right next to you
When you are overflowing with poison,
Your demon forming,
But
I will always be with you.
I will always support you.

I will help you let out your demon
That's formed from lies
And I will dispose of the poison
Oozing out of your pores
And rolling off of your tongue.

So please,
Even if you think you're alone
You're not.
I'm here.
I'm listening
And I'll do everything
To rid you
Of the poison flowing through your veins
Injected by others,
And produced by yourself.

Chasing fairies up the wall...
the cat
on Christmas night.