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It’s tender,

being the closest of friends..
but oh, isn’t it such a dangerous thing?
To hold you with care,
in the space we made,
while promising

I won’t touch a single thing.

But sweet love... to be this close
to someone like you..
need I say

what your voice can bring?

Warmth, truth,
supportive hands that tend--
it’s a dream come true
for those who bleed.

But when a deep need is quietly met,
can the heart resist
going full send?

And still—when a need
is met without hands,
without lips,

without sleep lost
   in shared breath...

how long before restraint slips?

This depth.. untouched,
unspoken, unseen..
it burns through the walls
between you and me.

Yes, even with agreements
so lovingly made...
there’s always the risk
in a love so brave;


  that we will  both

             come

      undone.



Mine, immaculate dream
made breath and skin...
Now we’ll try to stay blind
to the hope and fear outside...
Who do you need?
Who do you love?

When you come undone
https://youtu.be/5X5KweDhsaI?si=_VCO-kKUwqSB-Acs

#Support
We went walking on the ocean
it wasn’t even summer yet
a little cold, we were happy, I was seventeen years old
He wrote on a box of shells we found
said "keep this around"

that box is gone now
somewhere between inhumane moves
and people I don’t talk to anymore
but inside of me
it stays
drowning in the dream

I’ve always loved the water
always the first to dip my toes
no matter how cold
and even now, id go wandering in deep waters unknown
barefoot
still
wishing to grow
up
but I'm always drowning
in the dream

I love with all my heart.
until he shows me who he really is
and then I wonder if
my father was the last man
who ever truly loved me

grief sits beneath my eyes
a broken heart is
too heavy to pick up
and fly
and I really try.
god, do I try.
but I always find myself
unable to walk steady
Maybe I'm not
one for the land

I’m always drowning in the dream
lipstick smeared in titanic movie scenes
Pretty words and a golden helping hand
But it all turns to quicksand
cant stay steady for too long
maybe I'm not one for the land

sea gentle and soft, then a storm on the brink
Love in white lace and dads handwriting in black ink
I try to run, I try to stand...
But baby, I may not be
one for the land

Im always drowning in the dream
O fairest Michele, a white rose torn
Ere I had breath, thy soul was mourned
a fragile star in heavens keep
blonde angel lured
into a cold blooded sea

hearts turned dark and secrets would creep
In silent nights
where the angels weep

Upon the twelfth of cruel May
The moon wept tears that veiled the day
He lured the blonde angel, I was fallen
a baby girls wings were clipped
pain became my calling

My father’s heart did break and die...
As the bottle drowned his anguished cry.
If magics hand could stop time
I'd save her
shed still be alive
and so would i

Upon the twelfth of cruel May,
The moon wept tears that veiled the day
He lured the angel, I was fallen
a baby girls wings were clipped
pain became my calling

Michele, I still wear your diamond ring
inside of me, it’s everything.
stolen from my hand, just like you,
Murdered love, an angel true

Blonde Angel in the spring dark, forever mine
a love that bleeds outside of time
The gun has gone off in my heart a thousand times,
cold fire burning through these fragile poetry lines
I was a baby, the pain came too soon
Michele's shadow following me like a dark perfumed room
the gun.. the love that’s gone
I carry it with me, all life long

This poem is for Michele Vitagliano.  It is also for Shanda Sharer.  Two Beautiful angels lost in the burn of a lying loves flame
you came into this world with time pressing on your neck
A child of dark shadows dancing near death
The doctors said you for sure would not stay
But even then, sickness couldnt extinguish your flame

They never saw the boy inside
you were lightning on the blue green sea tide
A misunderstood lullaby
but if you were ever searching for Love
I think you know
you found it
in me, your baby dove

Pain is the only true friend youve known
It got you bad, so now its something that doesn't even make you bleed
You are my beauty
and my beast

the sky turned blue green velvet
just like the way you had told me it would be so
i saw the shimmer of orion's belt, soft and slow
like you still here, but letting go

your eyes once held the ocean deep
now silence is the song you keep
you fade like daylight through the magic night mist
But I still feel you in all of this

the world forgets you, but I hold tight
to your ghost
dancing in the night
you
are
the
northern star

you are the light behind the stars
the whisper in the dark
the candlelight that somehow still remains
even now, just where you are
you are the light behind the stars
though your voice has gone away
your love will always stay

the world forgets you, but I hold tight
to your ghost
dancing in the night
you
are
the
northern star

the world forgets you,
but I know
you are the most
Beautiful
and they don't know
I hate the weight of each heavy smile
Within my worries are starting to pile
Sirens going and the alarm in my head
Has me wishing to weep instead
But the last thing I intend is to cause concern
So I hold the flames in though I feel my chest burn
Walls slowly creeping inch by inch
Closing in from all sides but I refuse to flinch
I hate to make a sound that might draw attention
So my anxiety I do not dare mention
Fighting for air but on the surface remain still
Underneath skin fear is too powerful to ****
All I want is for laughter to be more than a facade
And to look into the mirror and not view a fraud
Please just let my happiness for once be genuinely real
My emotions a tiring charade that I will never truly feel
Just one of those days
she had a telescope in her pocket.
one of those cool tiny ones, like a pirate might have
if he were searching for buried treasure.
she told me it was magic, let her see
enchanted things
like fairies and mermaids
and little trolls with fuzzy hair.
they were scared of normal people.
they were really shy, she said
but they were real and alive,
breathing air and eating brunch
and taking baths
like us.

she’d look through her telescope when we walked to school
or through the park
lost in it, like she wasn't even there next to me
but somewhere else, on an island
that no one had a map of.
sometimes she’d point, say
“look! in that tree, right there!”
so I’d squint and try to see
what only she could see
but all I’d see was some leaves
or a nest
or nothing at all.

sometimes I’d lie next to her on the lawn
and close my eyes.
and she could breathe an image behind my closed eyelids
and I could feel the breeze as fairies flew by,
and hear the mermaids’ tails sweeping against toasted rocks
and it was like I’d rowed a ship
across that ocean to her island
I’d found the map, I was next to her,
and the world was just as she said it was--
magical.
but the difference between me and her was
she could open her eyes, and still see it all.
but I’d open my eyes, and all I’d see
was some leaves
or a nest
or nothing at all.
"Every closed eye is not sleeping, and every open eye is not seeing." -Bill Cosby
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