Due to depletion
of their natural habitat,
geese have lost their
innate silliness.
In response,
they've generationally
committed to
a calculated pettiness–
method acting as
the world's
surliest birds–
in order to destabilize,
and thereby own,
the bipedal mammals
who so routinely
infringe upon their
closely guarded
personal
honk space.

On my way
to cancel out
my father's
vote
by slipping
through this
wormhole,
to travel back
in time,
and ensure
he gets hugged
more often
in his formative
years,
and that ideally,
he ingests
way less
lead.

They shot the hostage
with the shrink ray.
And before the kidnapper
could get their bearings,
they blasted the tiny hostage
with their replicator beam.
As duplicate hostages
swarmed the tarmac,
like ants at a picnic,
a voice boomed from
the hidden megaphone–
We are giving you
thirty seconds to choose
whether you prefer to
battle a thousand tiny
lightly-armed hostages,
or one gargantuan
unarmed hostage.
As the kidnapper lifted
a boot to squash
the nearby clones,
a drone swooped in
with a payload of
a thousand tiny swords.
Excellent news,
boomed the voice.
We all hoped
this is how
it would end.