The things I like to enjoy are slowly coming back
Not very fast, but I think I'm gonna be okay

The sun had tucked behind the clouds
Now all that's left is sadness
As the clouds are sobbing, there is nothing left
The days are slowly fading
The sidewalk cracks are filled
With every drop of rain
And every ounce of hurt
The dark umbrellas are opened
And the dirt turned into mud
The happiness has drowned with
Every drop of rain

Our Friendship was meant to last
I loved you more than everything under the sun
Our friendship became the past
Because death has won

They have rebelled
and they have paid the price

You said you loved me
Such a lie
How blind I could be
Did your love die
Oh was it fake, oh now I see
I guess it's fine cause now I'm free
Free to love who I please

From a young age
You have been scared of the dark
Maybe it's because you never know what is lurking there
You never know what is hiding there either
As you grow up you learn that the darkness is still there
Just in a different place
It's in your mind
And you can never get rid of it

I'm sorry that I'm always saying sorry
I feel like I need to apologize every time I've done something wrong
Even in times where I know I haven't done anything wrong
I still feel obligated to say sorry
So forgive me please

I like to look for luck
I know that I need it
but the luck of the clovers
Is Imaginary
It simply just doesn't work
I have found enough in the time that I have been alive
For the "luck" to last me until I die
Believe it or not four leaf clovers
Do not hold luck
But looking for them gives you something to do
If only you can be patient enough to look for them.

I kept being too generous
You took that for granted
I kept giving
You kept taking
I gave my heart away to you
Then I took it back

The distance between us is sending grief my way
Yet it wont last for as long as they say
We'll both grow up and we'll figure this out
Neither of us will hold on to doubt
We'll sing songs
And we'll dance
It wont be long
Until we are holding hands
And the melodies of our love song
Will fill all the lands
Together we'll say
Welcome to this glorious day
In which I'll see your beautiful face

You are a child of the king
The Lord has made you in his image
You are loved beyond measure
You are seen
You are forgiven
You are wanted
You are created with a purpose

You are so much more than this darkness
Keep going, you've got this!

I miss you more than you know
One day you were here
The next you were gone
My Mom called me downstairs to tell me the news
As soon as she said you were gone
I didn't believe her
I thought that there was a mistake
It turns out they were right
You were gone
I cried because my heart broke
Every memory of us flashed into my head
You were my best friend
You still are
NOBODY can replace you EVER
I love you
You were like a sister to me
I remember crying so hard that my whole body ached for days
I should've called you that day
I wasn't there
I miss you
Why did you leave me?
Your gone now
I will never ever get to see you again
Now I have to live my entire life without you
So I play our song ( Not About Angels ) on repeat
And the intro to the song
Reminded me of your funeral
They played our song
It literally broke me
Even now I don't know If I will be okay

My best friend
Has gone away
Never again will I see her face
She will live on
But in different ways
How many times will I cry
Or try to hold in pain
For she has gone on
She has gone away

The reason people do evil more than good
It's because it's easier
You don't have to try as hard

I'm sorry for leaving
But you know I couldn't've stayed

They are hard to find...So when you do find them don't let go....

Take me there
to my home
Down that old gravel road
Where the trees line the path
And the cows mow the grass
oh bring me back
to the place I use to live
To the home that made me, me
Take me down the gravel roads
And let me feel the breeze
let me hear the buzzing of the bees
let me go back home
please, please, please

Before I was born
You were assigned to me
You were probably told to guide and direct me
Through this incredible journey called life  
I'm sorry if this world becomes too much
And my thoughts start to consume me
I hope you know that it's not your fault  
You make me hold on another day
Right now I'm relying on you
I need you to give me strength
I need you to remind me that I have a purpose
Because right now I am struggling
Please don't forget about me

Womb
A new heart beating
A strong push in the belly
New life is starting
Birth
A beautiful thing
Such a love has came today
Now watch them grow big
Childhood
Innocent child
New to this amazing world
Growing strong and tall
Alive
I see the morning
Another day is coming
I am alive still
Death
When my time has come
Lay me on down in the ground
Allow me to rest
Heaven
See the streets of gold
Sing in the angels choir
Hear the trumpet sound
Eternity
To live forever
To smile in his presents
Now live with the lord

I've learned to live with knowing your not...
Yet when you died a piece of me did too
I guess now I am half alive.

I'm sorry for being so sad all the time
But it hurts knowing I can't make everybody happy
Not even myself

I was happy
before you and with you
But now
Now I'm just empty inside

Happy birthday to me
Happy birthday to me
Happy birthday to me
Happy birthday to me

Though you are gone
You're still my best friend
Happy birthday
It would've been your 16th
But you'll always be 15
I miss you
I'm going to go to your grave today
I have to much to tell you.

I despise everything that you have turned into
In the time we have been a part
You have changed
Your priorities have changed
Everything that made me fall in love with you
Has faded, It's gone now
The only thing that's left of what once was is the memories
But even that is not enough for me
To know that now all I have left for you is hate
I don't even think I can say I love you
Or that I was proud to say that once upon a time I did love you
In fact I am embarrassed to say that I used to call you mine
I know that people say that when you love somebody you want the best for them
I wanted the best for you, but now I want you to hurt the way I did
I want you to feel every emotion I felt
Especially when you were playing with my emotions
Because one day you wanted me the next I was nothing to you
I want you to feel the burn of all of it
I want you to cry until your lungs feel like they are going to cave in like I did
Because you Made me hurt, you made me feel useless
You made me hate you
Maybe your Mom had something to do with it too
when she told me I wasn't ever going to be enough for you
And I was the problem in your life
I cannot even look at you because of how much you hurt me
The fact that you even moved on so soon
Was I not anything to you?
Did I mean anything?
We were together for almost two years and as soon as we broke up
You moved on
You had a whole line of people waiting for you
And as soon as you could you went for the next person who showed you attention.
How pathetic

I'm not saying sorry
For something you did
I wont ever take the blame of you again
You broke me one to many times
Left my heart in pieces
I hate you and I hate her
I hate your Mom and your whole family

I sound petty
But that is nothing compared to what you did

I hate the way I am
I hate how I love to quickly
And leave so easy
I hate that I complain
I hate that I'm not enough for myself
I hate me, I hate me, I hate me
I hate me so so so much
Why do I have to be like this
I'm stuck

You told me I was all you'd ever need.
Was I though? Was I really if the second you got you moved on. You never looked back. You didn't care if I was about to die of pain. You never freaking cared. I hate you with everything inside of me. I hate you for breaking me when you knew how bad I was already broken. You knew everything. Even things that I wouldn't tell a soul and you used it to your advantage. You used it act like I needed to figure myself out. Maybe your right about that maybe I need to check my standards because you set the bar so low it touched hell. I cared about you, but not anymore. You changed the way I look at love and because of you lts hard for me to even tell someone that I love them. You are pathetic and I pity you for everything that you've done to me. In the end that still won't bother you though. It won't be enough to make you change. I hope that all the pain you caused me comes back and knocks you down. I hope that it's so much heartache that you question your ability to stand again. And I desperately hope that your heart breaks. Because we both know how idiotic you've been. but you won't admit to your faults. It wasn't until the end of our relationship when I found out how you truly felt. Everything I told you about my trauma you discarded like it was trash. You used it to hurt me worse. And if anybody wants to tell me I'm wrong and they have a problem with what I'm saying that's Their issue not mine. I hope that your new girlfriend comes to realize she's dating a little boy who hasn't matured. Who hasn't grown up enough to respect people. You need to get yourself in Check before someone does it for you. I promise that when that time comes your mommy won't be there for you to go running back to. So next time you wanna break a girls heart just because you know you can, rethink your decisions. You only think you've seen crazy, but I promise that this crazy can easily turn into insanity real quick.

Have you looked into the mirror
Just to see what you look like after you've cried?
To see how empty you look
I do...

If Heaven had an address
I'd be writing away
You'd be receiving a letter
From me everyday
If Heaven had a phone
I'd be calling all the time
Id' still be your best friend
And you'd still be mine

You said hello for the first time
Had it pretty good
Until...
Until you had to say goodbye
Because they aren't in this life anymore

Here I am
Shattered and broken
But ready to be repaired...

You don't know how long you have left with the people you love
So while you have that breath in your lungs
And a beat in your chest
Hold onto what ever you have
Cause you never know how fast it can be taken away

They say home is where the heart is
that's why my heart belongs to you

I was so fragile and young
You never really cared though
I was nothing but a child
And you made me hate my existence
How Could You?
You never saw all of those nights
I cried myself to sleep covering my mouth
To make sure no sound got out
Or the times I hid in the closet so you couldn't find me
Yet you hunted me down
You thirsted on my pain
You found pleasure in my cries
How could you?
You made me feel like I was nothing
Here I am years later
Still battling depression  
Caused by you.

I keep trying to express how I feel
But I fear I am doing a terrible job at it

To a point we are all half alive
We live in a world full of deception
We had to learn how to thrive
with our different perception
We try to survive
But into the darkness we dive
we listen to the voices in our mind
That is what is unique about
Human kind

I saw you cry
I heard you weep
I smelled the rain
I touched the mud
I tasted the salt

I don't know what I want
I don't know exactly how I feel
I don't know what to do

All I know is I want you to be happy
I don't want to hurt you

I'm scared

If you ever should have to choose
choose what makes you happy

If ever you should have to leave
Leave with a purpose

If ever you should have to try
Do your best

If ever you should cry
Don't let anybody hear

If ever you're sad
Pray

I know depression's hard
But please hold on
Lay down your guard
I don't want you to be gone
I'll be here
I'm here
I don't wanna lose another person

Our love's     It's a game
One you thoroughly enjoyed
You let me fall into a trap
A poisonous game
Can't you see
I'm done

Let me leave
Let me go
Leave me be
all alone
I wont be back
just so you know
I'm leaving now
I'm going home

I'm so tired of this world
I'm so tired of trying
Why can't I give up

I must not be okay
Because I saw you today
You were smiling so much
From ear to ear
I must be dreaming
because you're not actually alive
Your still gone

Look at this world
Have you seen what it's become
It breaks me to see this

I am in the middle of being old enough and too young
I cannot do the things that older people can do yet
I can't drink, I can't drive, I can't buy a house
But I am too old to do the things children do
I don't need to sit in the back seat of the car anymore
I don't need to follow my parents in the store anymore
I am in the middle of being old enough and too young

That one boy who pressured me into telling him I liked him
Now is mad when I finally decided I was done lying about this
I don't like him, In fact I kind of felt bad for him
I felt like the only way to be friends was to be more than friends
It made me uncomfortable lying to him
So I told him I won't be friends with him anymore
Then he tried manipulating me into a relationship
Using the Bible against me

Is it just me who goes through this??