I must not be okay
Because I saw you today
You were smiling so much
From ear to ear
I must be dreaming
because you're not actually alive
Your still gone

Though you are gone
You're still my best friend
Happy birthday
It would've been your 16th
But you'll always be 15
I miss you
I'm going to go to your grave today
I have to much to tell you.

Sometimes I feel so much
That I feel nothing at all
It's like I'm standing under a dark sky
staring at the ground
while the rain water soaks my clothes

If you cannot respect me
Why should I respect you?

Please just let me go
Let me just be free
Free from all your lies
And from you’re captivity

Don’t keep me here
Drowning in my tears
Let me walk away
From all this hurt and all this pain
  
Let me see the light
That I thought wasn’t there
Surrender me
Before I surely disappear

I'm sorry for leaving
But you know I couldn't've stayed

Dear people on hello poetry
Do you think I should tell him I like him, or no
I really don't know if I should

Please I need advice

The truth is I'm scared to ask how you feel
Because I don't wanna get rejected.
I know what I feel is real
I don't want my love to be neglected
but I feel you'll only tell me no

"That's the thing about pain, It demands to be felt."
- John Green
The Fault In Our Stars

After years of emptiness and pain
I gained wisdom, but I also grew insane
I found myself more lost than I've ever been
So I added battle scars to my skin
It numbed the emotions in my soul
Yet even that started taking a toll
Now I look into the mirror
Wishing I could see life clearer
Knowing that I'm unable
Maybe I should put that knife back on the table
Maybe I should
If I could you know I would

Our Friendship was meant to last
I loved you more than everything under the sun
Our friendship became the past
Because death has won

She wasn't afraid of death
I learned that the hard way
She took that gun and she went
How could she leave me like this?
My best friend is gone

I thought we'd have forever
Forever wasn't an option
Not anymore

She tried before but was never successful
This time she was
and it literally broke me

Because now I stare at that empty seat next to me
Now I stare at a grave
the same grace my best friend is buried  
Because this world became too much

She took that gun and she went
How could she leave me like this?

Holding on is the same as letting go sometimes

You are holding on to somebody you had to let go of

Through the sidewalk cracks it grew
Like a beauty brand new
Through the days of despair
It could never compare
But the flowers were you
And the beauty was too

The day I found out you were gone
I instantly lost all motivation
I stopped caring about things
I stopped enjoying what I used to
I stopped because I was more worried about you
Then I was about myself

The wind's blowing fast
the seas are raging
The night is full of a watery blast
And the time is ageing
It's hard to leave you in the past
And still hold on
I wish I could go back
to when you weren't gone

Why do you pretend to like me
Then go behind my back?

Why do you act like you know everything?

Why do you choose other people over me all the time?

Why do you make me feel so small?

Why do you do half the things you do?

This week I cried a lot
I cried because I realized that I will never be able to hear you laugh again
So all I am left with is memories of the times we shared together
I still see you, but only in my mind
I can't ever see you in person again.
still I wish you a Happy Birthday
I love you and I miss you

Thursday is your birthday
But I have to celebrate it without you

You said you loved me
Such a lie
How blind I could be
Did your love die
Oh was it fake, oh now I see
I guess it's fine cause now I'm free
Free to love who I please

Somebody to have
Somebody to hold
Somebody to want me
Until we grow old
Somebody to care
Somebody to stay
Someone who will love me
I want that somebody

The overwhelming clouds above
Send rain and thunder
In a way it's like love
It makes us wonder

You know it hurts
but you feel forced
I know you're struggling
Can't you see
You're crumbling
That relationship is hurting you more than helping you
Why do you stay?
If you want to walk away

There are times when you can put into words how you feel
Other times you can't
There are days when you feel the motivation
Sometimes you don't
It's okay, that's normal

To a point we are all half alive
We live in a world full of deception
We had to learn how to thrive
with our different perception
We try to survive
But into the darkness we dive
we listen to the voices in our mind
That is what is unique about
Human kind

Some people think that people in heaven are looking down on us right now
that we can see them through the stars
that it's their light shining down on us
Well...I'm lost in the stars
Looking for you

Rest my dear
fall into a slumber
mama's near
don't worry 'bout the thunder
I'll dry those tears
so rest my dear
I'll be right here
scaring all those monsters

They have rebelled
and they have paid the price

The air gets tight
so does the space
The people seem closer
Though they are far away
I get claustrophobic
I need out

We live only to die

I don't wanna die because I gave up
I don't wanna die alone
I want to die fighting for what I believe in
I want to die with confidence that I will live eternally
I want to die knowing that I lived my best life
more than anything I want to die peacefully

They come from a dark place in my mind and soul
A place where no one goes

Why does everybody look down on me
They make me feel like I don't matter
They say things that aren't technically making fun of me
But they are still belittling me
I shouldn't feel like I am less than them
It hurts my feelings
But that doesn't matter does it

I kept being too generous
You took that for granted
I kept giving
You kept taking
I gave my heart away to you
Then I took it back

My Mom bought me a ring
It says "Just Breathe"
I look at it and I can hear her voice
Reminding me to breathe

Never again will I get to see her face or hear her laugh.
Never again will I be able to sit by her and tell jokes just to make us laugh
She's gone
I miss her with everything inside of me
I didn't have enough time with her
She was my whole world
What do you do when your whole world crashes
Who do you call now
How do you live
Everything just feels like It's crumbling
Without her here I'm falling a part
I need her back
But there is no way to make the possible

I was happy
before you and with you
But now
Now I'm just empty inside

I always have thoughts that come into my head
They tell me how I feel
I quickly grab my paper and pen
And I soon as I go to write it down
I lost the thought

The reason people do evil more than good
It's because it's easier
You don't have to try as hard

When Things don't go the way you wanted
You blame me
When you cry all night
You blame me
When we fight and you start to yell and scream
You blame me
You say it's all my fault
Maybe it is
Maybe it's my fault because I didn't leave sooner
And for that I blame myself

𝒜 𝓉𝒾𝓂ℯ 𝓌𝒾𝓁𝓁 𝒸ℴ𝓂ℯ 𝒶𝓃𝒹 𝓎ℴ𝓊 𝓌𝒾𝓁𝓁 𝓈ℯℯ.
𝒴ℴ𝓊 𝓌𝒾𝓁𝓁 𝒻𝒾𝓃𝒹 𝓉𝒽𝒶𝓉 𝓈ℴ𝓂ℯ𝒷ℴ𝒹𝓎.
𝒴ℴ𝓊 𝓌𝒾𝓁𝓁 𝓁ℴ𝓋ℯ 𝓉𝒽ℯ𝓂 𝒶𝓈 𝓉𝒽ℯ𝓎 𝒶𝓇ℯ, 𝒶𝓃𝒹 𝓉𝒽ℯ𝓎 𝓌𝒾𝓁𝓁 𝓁ℴ𝓋ℯ 𝓎ℴ𝓊 𝒻ℴ𝓇 𝓎ℴ𝓊𝓇 𝒽ℯ𝒶𝓇𝓉. 𝒴ℴ𝓊𝓇 𝓁ℴ𝓋ℯ 𝓌𝒾𝓁𝓁 𝒷ℯ 𝓊𝓃ℯ𝓃𝒹𝒾𝓃ℊ 𝒶𝓃𝒹 𝒾𝓉 𝓌𝒾𝓁𝓁 𝒷ℯ 𝓉𝓇𝓊ℯ ℐ 𝓅𝓇ℴ𝓂𝒾𝓈ℯ 𝓉𝒽ℯ𝓎 𝓌𝒾𝓁𝓁 𝒻𝒾𝓃𝒹 𝓎ℴ𝓊. 𝒴ℴ𝓊 𝒹ℯ𝓈ℯ𝓇𝓋ℯ 𝒾𝓉 𝓉ℴℴ

I miss you more than you know
One day you were here
The next you were gone
My Mom called me downstairs to tell me the news
As soon as she said you were gone
I didn't believe her
I thought that there was a mistake
It turns out they were right
You were gone
I cried because my heart broke
Every memory of us flashed into my head
You were my best friend
You still are
NOBODY can replace you EVER
I love you
You were like a sister to me
I remember crying so hard that my whole body ached for days
I should've called you that day
I wasn't there
I miss you
Why did you leave me?
Your gone now
I will never ever get to see you again
Now I have to live my entire life without you
So I play our song ( Not About Angels ) on repeat
And the intro to the song
Reminded me of your funeral
They played our song
It literally broke me
Even now I don't know If I will be okay

Why all of the sudden do you want me now?
After all of these years without any contact
You decided that now I am worth it?

I've messed up my metabolism
Because I compared myself to other people
I didn't eat for three months
I lost hair, I lost weight, so I gained an eating disorder
I tried to hide it from other people, especially my parents
Every morning I would dry heave until I threw up or until I couldn't breath anymore
Normally It would last for 15 minutes or more
I was passing out, and I was emotionally unstable
I weighed myself 3 times everyday
I was only 150 pounds
For me that was too much
I wasn't skinny like the other girls
It's been two years since I stopped eating
I'm still facing the consequences of that
I have to be on antacid pills
I can't eat a lot in one setting
I have to be on better eating schedules
Because now my body doesn't tell me if I'm hungry or not anymore
I have to accept who I am now
I have no other choice
Because I still have an eating disorder.

I was so fragile and young
You never really cared though
I was nothing but a child
And you made me hate my existence
How Could You?
You never saw all of those nights
I cried myself to sleep covering my mouth
To make sure no sound got out
Or the times I hid in the closet so you couldn't find me
Yet you hunted me down
You thirsted on my pain
You found pleasure in my cries
How could you?
You made me feel like I was nothing
Here I am years later
Still battling depression  
Caused by you.

Our love's     It's a game
One you thoroughly enjoyed
You let me fall into a trap
A poisonous game
Can't you see
I'm done

You have a choice
to stay or leave
Don't feel obligated to love me
You have a choice
I don't want you to feel like you have to stay
You are allowed to leave
I promise

Before I was born
You were assigned to me
You were probably told to guide and direct me
Through this incredible journey called life  
I'm sorry if this world becomes too much
And my thoughts start to consume me
I hope you know that it's not your fault  
You make me hold on another day
Right now I'm relying on you
I need you to give me strength
I need you to remind me that I have a purpose
Because right now I am struggling
Please don't forget about me

I hope you know I have been looking for you my whole life
I have been waiting for you to arrive
To come into my life and be my hero
And to love me as I am
I've been in love before
but our love will be everlasting
It will be better than I could ever imagine