I love you
I said but received no reply
you're angry at me I can tell
it breaks me inside
but I pretend all is well
you promised
I plead
but that just makes it worse
I shrink down in myself
it seems like a curse
I cant stand my ground
or fight for respect
so I'll beg for you love
give you my body to connect
I look in the mirror
and hate myself more than before
because the parts you called pretty
lie broken on your bedroom floor
you don't seem to realize
you don't seem to see
so ill shut my mouth
cause the problem must be me

I don’t want to die,
I want to cease to exist.
To never have been born
And never have lived
For my soul and body to disappear
For any memory of me to be gone
To dissolve into nothingness and
Never have been anything at all

You don’t know

That I trace

Three words

On your back

In every language that I know

So that it sinks into your skin,

So that your soul knows before your ears ever do

i want to peel your skin back
and reveal your deepest sweetness.
to look at your veins
and memorize their paths.
maybe then i’d understand
why you are so rough on the outside.
it takes a lot of work,
digging your fingernails into the flesh,
pulling and pulling until you are bare.
but it is all worth it;
to visit your center,
to break past what conceals you,
and take you apart
slice by slice.