Excitement pumped throughout my palms.
Sitting on the table,
I waited for a sign from you.
Hope lingered,
if only I would have known.

There was so much to look forward to
in this little room.
So many dreams to be had
by this small existence.
Only time would tell.

We held our breath
to hear our future.
Tears and anger followed.
There was no sign.
No sound.
No beat.
No life.

I’ll never forget the defeat
the denial
the devastation
the death.
You had barely just begun.
Now you will never be.

I felt it was my fault.
I could have done better.
I could have dreamed bigger.
I could have wished harder.
I could have…
done nothing.
Nothing.
Nothing.

I think about you often.
What would you look like?
What would you become?
Do you think of me too?
I’d like to think we’d be friends,
past the titles we were originally given,
but it will never be.

You left me that day.
It wasn’t your fault,
but I weep every year.
Understanding has never come.
My heart holds you still,
my joy.

when I hide my face behind my hands
does life still continue with demands
and all its harshness and bad plans
through all the toxicant pangs?
I will keep my eyes closed and hold my breath
Until you come back from death

Honey,
Don't talk.
Just listen.
That's what I've done
my whole life with you.

Whenever the sunlight struck your honey-smeared face, it left a golden glow.

i like goodbyes
about as much as i like
my shoes coming untied

anticipating an absence
always throws off my balance
then my heartstrings come unraveled
with these tears i must battle

i like goodbyes
about as much as i like
believing all these lies

will there ever be a day
where i can smile and be okay
to say a hello with a happy sigh
and never worry about saying goodbye