Are you lost in the time,
or lost in the space
or
Just out of my face?

Who bent the rainbow?
Was beauty it's lure?
Bent like a bow,
can't use it as a boat
to sail across the universe.
Utility, not beauty,
is important.

A girl gazes at the sky
and gain insight like never

She learns a lot from the sky
Than the books had taught her

The sky speaks about life

The more she sees the sky
The more she learns
The more she seeks
The more she falls in love with life

Do you still read my poems?
Do you still think of my words?
Do you still walk alone in silky hair?
Do you still talk with a sweet smile?
I still miss you with tears in my eyes.
Your love still wakes up in my heart!

Do you still enjoy the morning rays?
Do you still paint the evening sight?
Do you still sing in the tune I did?
Do you still dance barefoot?
I cry for you and I blame myself;
I still have pain from your departure!

How beautiful the dewy mornings were with you
by wrapping us together hidden in a shawl!
How sweet the spring afternoons were with you
by breaking every bond in love!
Maybe raindrops make your shiny face shy
and my thirst still sips your drawn love.
I can't think of your sudden separation!

I feel like a prisoner in my own head
My thoughts rattling the cell gate wanting to get out
Then the guard yelling to get back
That’s me... I’m the guard
Telling my feelings to get back
Knowing that no one would understand
Knowing that things are getting out of hand
Ya know the funny thing is, is that they tell you to reach out before it gets bad
But then when you do, you get told you’re overdramatic or overreacting
So I’m constantly stuck feeling like a prisoner and a guard at the same time
Feeling like i’m serving life for a crime
A crime i didn’t even commit
I didn’t ask to feel this way
I didn’t ask for sleepless nights
Contemplating life
I didn’t ask for constant overthinking and never feeling enough
I’m trapped with no way out
I try to scream
I try to shout
But then there comes that guard again
Telling me to shut up because if I tell someone they aren’t going to understand
It’s a constant battle between the two
And i don’t know exactly what to do

Your puzzled expression at the award ceremony showed the agony you had undergone due to your mental exile from reality, while composing your poetry on occultism.