am i manipulative,

or pieces of alcoholism,

of bottles and losing lovers,

leaving loved ones on a whim,

winning in whirlwinds of loss,

dreams of stability and sure,

but your eyes are where I'm lured,

leaving you on a whim,

cold and cautious and scared.

Most days I feel so lonely
     Hide behind this mask like does anybody know me?
      Still dealing with the same stuff I dealt with when I was a kid
        Maybe I never grew up
Maybe I'm still a kid
       Maybe I'll never get over it.

Most days I just wanna lay in bed
      Close my eyes and forget about the world cause the world already closed their eyes and forgot about me.

I just feel like I could float away and die
Send me up to heaven with a message in a bottle saying " Return back to sender"
Or go down in hell and hang with some of the family.... probably shouldn't said that... oops my apologies.

Swim with the tide if you want to go far in life!