I have the restraint
of the holiest saint
I still ****** a nun
black habit was fun.

The doctors keep us meek
we know the pad they keep
just one more script  to sleep
drowning in the black deep.

The things we've been through,
some were lies but mostly true.
We drank our strangest brew,
dreamed our lives, never knew
tomorrow what madness grew
what in love's trance we'd do.

I hate to burden you
with my ugly stew.
I've wreaked havoc
too much on the clock.
I wish I were a pain.
Humanity's stain
died in a **** oven
pity blessed coven.

Do you think
I don't know
I left you to sink
in the undertow?

I know I broke
all that mattered
we never spoke.
I died splattered.

My scarecrow has a brain.
My Tin man has a heart.
Dorothy circles the drain.
She went back to the start
Her lion found his part.
Time moves us all apart.

I remember lovers from years ago.
I don't remember darkness or glow.
Angels and ****** felt the same.
For the life of me I forget their name.

I don't want to be cruel
to the innocent fool
and innocent lamb.
I hate the me I am.
I set the jackals loose
in hangover noose
scare the grand kid
scar his heart I did.

He shouted in a whisper
my name in his phlegm.
I miss you at the end
can we just start again?

I abandoned myself
kids and wife on
Mariana's shelf
reborn my son
staged crazy life
always have fun.

I'm pyramid scheme.
I'm a silent scream.
I Love You forever
alone frozen lover.
Wish upon a star
hide a birth scar.

We call it death
took final breath
why? Cruel ends
god's message sends
next in line to die
don't question why.

The blue pill
The blue rug
In Valiumville
always blue hug

10 keeps me sane
20 I'm a zombie
I know my name
never truly free.

My body on the stainless steel.
They drain my blood out while
pumping life back into in me.
I'm dressed in the latest style.
They make me up like a *****.
I finally look best to please.
Friends never see the corpse.
They only see their memories.

I sit on the curb at the liquor store
until 9 am when it finally serves,
wait for desperate beauty queen.
I talk smooth settle her nerves.
We share a bottle and queen bed
*** was just a lost cause at best.
I sit on the curb at the liquor store
until 9 am when it finally serves.

She wears red **** Me heels.
   your hands that woman feels,
   always swaying to her siren song.
   Go home at dawn where you belong
   with a sweet Lover of your heart.
   hold her close and never part.

Earthquake. Atom Bombs.
Commies' hungry tombs.
Homecoming once more
Dad's back home from war.

I mumble and slur
our life is just a blur
ocean over and under
love is always blunder
set me free once again
divorce my wander sin
Gomorrah and *****
burned into the calm.

When you stole my heart I was dancing.
  I was clumsy on my knees romancing.
  When I kissed splendid siren *******
  We slept and we ****** slow as beasts
  in morning and you wept. I wonder why
  the mirage gets closer **** it will die.

War's soldiers never the same
boys looking for adventure.
Rough stranger my son's name
comes home an angry warrior.

It's a grand adios
taking your dose
of the morphine
softens the scene.
Visit first lover.
Your dead mother
begs your mercy
father so angry
in war's terror
a simple error
over and over
blood in clover
float in a dream
last shot unseen.

I saw it sprayed on a rock.
  "Why Do You All Hate Me?"
  I thought I don't know you
  so I can't hate you but if
  we meet for coffee I'll try.
  Maybe you'll hate me instead?

Throbbing ****
Hangman's knot
Marriages die
the vows a lie.

I am inebriated
I am liberated
from God's eye
judging til I die.
His eye is blinded
staring at my sun.
I am God's drunk
I am His only son.

Humanity unable to be human
breaks my shiver bone's pieces
to choke my spider love again.
Tattooed as my ash blood ceases.

Machines are whirring
drunken eye's blurring
future in ashes burning
the world keeps turning.

CIA Operation do or die
holograms make you ***
so real pants are never dry
humans are forever dumb.

Seagulls crying over who knows what
   riding ocean breezes we'd all die for.
   We fight drunk in our room, a prelude
   ******* on the sheets with an anchor.
   I hear the 9th symphony when we ***.
   We are one hearing seagulls laughter.
   Wide awake at midnight smell our ***
  I finally fall asleep in the deep after.

Itches
*******
crucifixes
alter boy
priest toy
lover joy

lesbian nun
so much fun
spank girls
warm curls
flag unfurls
****** pearls

I melt into promises like molten lead
   cooling into bullets aimed at my heart.
   I never make them lightly or ever mean
   to keep them forever they never start.

   I'm at war with me. I'll be victor and I'll
   be defeated and I'll bleed all over brave
   while I die in a trench of my own intention.
   Bury me where I fall in an unmarked grave.

The sky's so clear
  in the atmosphere
  stars perch on a tree
  caged birds set free
  my mind takes flight
  into the cold night
  old lover's heartbeat
  naked in the street
  I'll chase her heat
  I saw her in a window
  her curly hair in a bow
  when I just can't feel
  what's dream or real
  my dogs walk me home.
  I still yearn alone.

She's bitter but comforts me,
like mommy could never be.
It haunts my mind with desire.
I'm always looking for her fire.
Sirens burned me up as we came.
****** saved me from the shame.

We wore suicide vests
into our love nests.
Friends come and go
some fast some slow.
Drunk on your wine
everything was fine.

I'm a country song
in a bar doing wrong
hope to sleep in beds
unknown tails heads
I bleed mercy after all
always sought after fall
Join me in my lonely death
give me your last breath.

Coming of age
turning the page
into ice and rage
escape the cage.

skies alive tonight
stars are on fire
libidos take flight
quench our desire.
You gave me breath
when I couldn't breathe
helped me avoid death

I don't remember names
but never forget the feel
of warmth from flames
touch it that is real

Who will dare to be the first? Step
   right up and put your money where
   your lust is. Inside this tent is a
   ******. She needs to be deflowered.

   Hyman guaranteed, doctor certified.
   She'll blush and giggle and be demure.
   When push comes to shove she delivers.
   Is a rare opportunity to taste the pure.

Wrapped in a pretty box
of promises and kisses
I'm just such a sly fox
give you hits and misses.

He had a lust for a life
chose a female for a wife.
She grew fat with his child
but was killed in the wild.
He grieves as best he can
his wife chooses a man.

I must have brought a ton of bad Karma
  from my past lives to the here and now.
  I hear phrases in sleep that make me sad.
  You can't keep your hands off...
  What the hell were you thinking?
  You have so much wasted potential.
  Why do you keep getting drunk?
  I'm an imposter that people love.
  I'm an imposter who cares about
  everybody except me, myself and I.

You better get
   your makeup kit
   make the fear
   last night
   disappear.
   wear your shades
   'til the black eye fades
   people just stop asking
   when shopping at the IGA
   repair the fist holes
   in walls and doors
   and in your heart.

I swim in my sea of doubt
caught in riptides I shout
ocean swallows me silent
nobody knows I was bent.

Our world grew quiet like the dead.
   I never heard silence like this before.
   I knew it was over when we ate alone
   and slept apart and watched our own
   shows. We always adapt. We're good at it.
   It's easier than fixing what is broken.

'Til death we vowed
heads fervent bowed
We'd been drunk wild
belly full of child
18 and 19 naive
tonight we believe.

I've had enough living.
All taking and giving
the promises broken
forgiven never spoken.
Tally wacker won't work.
There's no more circle ****.
Our tears are all the same.
Stay warm in dead flame.

drunk and ****
***** and egg
I was a tiny god
in my tiny womb
swoosh the sound
one night stand
name me Hank
Shea walk plank

75 and I fell again.
Hurt worse when sober
in the morning sun
in my cold October.

Hold my broken heart
bring it back to life.
Love's perfect storm
has a sharper knife.

You weren't seen
in my blind spot
too old so young
perfect ink blot
no trouble at all
self absorbed dad
in and out of lust
edge of mind mad.
you were a rock
in my slaughter
never faltered
first Daughter.

Our sacred backstair lust
diamond turns to dust.

I steal your words
rearrange them
everything I write
becomes a Hymn.