Ocean deep are disturbed thoughts
Sky high of dragging frustrations
I weep same as clouds full of emotions
River flowing silently in the middle of nowhere
Here I am dressed with a gown of sorrow
Intensive silky pieces within thy shoulders
Oxygen unable to reach those lungs
Whereas I desire to inhale some one more time

I miss her
The one who used to smile
Blush over tiny things over and over again
And chuckle over the sound of her laughter

I miss her
The one who used to own happiness
Roaming around the colourful butterflies
Until she could feel butterflies in her tummy

I miss her
Young girl full of impossible dreams
That kept her day dreaming throughout the day
Whereas they were just fairytale that kept her faith

I miss her
Who didn't think of tomorrow
Just taking the day as it came
Allowing herself to breath

I miss me
Not this one full of endless thoughts
Which are drying up her bones
Who carry the universe on her shoulders

On this midnight hour
I desire to pen...

What is in the mind
What is in the heart
And unleash the heaviness in my spirit

To allow the ink of this pen to drip
And drive the desire within thee

The hands are willing
Yet the mind is impulsive
With omnipresent emotions

I found missing pieces,
In this board of riddle I assembled,
And only I realized,
It is not just them incomplete,
So is everything

It has become one of the songs,
that we sing, yet we lost the meaning

We sing with no hope,
manifest with no believe,
neither understanding

But the question still stand,
are we really going to be okay?

Been staying on my lane
Through the stormy rain
Yet I still feel bound in chain

Taking the train
Of soul-searching again
Yet I keep going insane

I just need a glass of champagne
Take a deep breath and retrain
As all seems to be in vain

When she hold on in a breaking moment
Through emotions no one would understand,
It is Him

When she lays down under the tears of heaven
That ushers tears on her eyes
To the glimpse of heaven,
It is Him

When she think she is healing
Then in between breaks down
Yet never gives up,
It is Him

That uphold her hand
Capture her heart
And never let go,
It is God

Holding on
To the last breath within her
Wanting second chance to life
But it is just not enough
To keep her heart beating

Forcing eyes to stay open
While slowly closing in
Trying to move herself side to side
While slowly shutting down
Getting tired of holding on

Angels at the bed side
Singing "well done, well done"
Time to say goodbye
Tears dropping one last time
As the father called his daughter home
It is not fair but His will

The nervousness within her cheeks,
From the warmth of his hands,
Ignite the light within her eyes,
And yet recount unutterable feeling,
Hidden deep within her heart.

Till our eyes were ocean deep in the red sea
God knows we prayed
Till our bodies could no longer race against our heartbeat
God knows we prayed for you
Stood in the gap for the life of an amicable soul
As if we had the supernaturals to stop the universe
But still you said, "I wanna go home"

Courageous Ella
Full of cheeky laugh
Unexplainable aurora
I watched you ride beneath a new born sun
Just like horses embarking on a rote of new Jerusalem
That we are all set to paddle upon one of the good days
When time begin to run against the clock

One beautiful morning
God called you to stroll the heaven with him
Held your hand to let you smell the roses full of life
And danced through the melodies only played in heaven
I can picture you looking at your mommy and your daddy
Whispering "I love you but I wanna go home,
Tell Raphaella she'll never be alone, I'm now her angel"
Basking into the arms of the Father wearing crown of victory

I wish to marry a poet
Who will pen me down
In such a magnificent way
And make me drown
In the ocean of his words all day

I wish to marry a poet
Whom the theory of his ink
Will channel him to find inspiration in me
As I turn him on through each wink
Like the universe belong to him and his rhyme

I wish to marry a poet
Who will turn our love story
Into a fairytale triangle
Like a startling light of the glory
Shining bright like a candle

Labored of immorality to immorality
By the blood sanctified
Apparelled with righteousness
Now gaze on the price,

Jesus Christ

Put on her shield
Raise the double-edged sword
Placed within the palm of her hand
Just like Moses she will lead

Clothed with piety
Take on the sling, put on stones
Mouth full of praises
Like David she will subdue

A warrior of exactitude
Rising against the Amorite
Full of dispute
To authenticate

Possessing like Joshua
Dominating like Judah
And birthing new creation like Mary
For she is of Jesus Nation

It was this other day
Picture it in your mind
Pen it in your heart
Once the ink is dry, let it go

Dry bones once breathed life upon
For supernaturals to come into existence
Became dry and useless once again
Just like useless agony, let it go

Incriminating of oneself to criminal prosecution,
Into a place where its dark and cold as highways of California
Hands on my back bound to bottom in chains,
With no where to hide

A long walk to freedom,
As I drag my feet to the right,
And look up in the sky with my eyes closed
Finally, I could see a tiny cloud to liberation of Sunday morning blues.

What if humans
were not created to be happy?
Only to exist, then deteriorate,

To the underworld where we belong,
Whatever it is,
Life seems to have no truth.

Debts get written off,
whenever a debtor become insolvent
And I wonder why it can't be the same procedure,
for the agony shrouded deep within
It has been long overdue.

Eyes wide open like a bulb
Shining through the night
Yet love makes us blind

I asked him the other day
"Do you love me?"
He placed my hand in his beating heart
Whispered on my ears with his calming voice
Opened my eyes to read between the lines
And made me taste the liquid from his well
Until butterflies were chanting on our heads
And he said "That is love"

Put off the flames
Close the door behind my back
Yet love came like a rushing mighty wind

with just one stolen glance into each other's eyes,
a picture perfect of our love was designed

we laid on each other's arms throughout the night,
and made promises too perfect to be broken

Honestly, if eternity calls our names,
I'm picking up the call,
and get to do this lifetime thing with you

Hold my hand as I hold yours
And let us tear on each other's arms

How vulnerable we were
That night,
we made love
And shed tears
Then broke each others hearts

To harmonize thyself
For sense of inclusion
Within thy brokenness
She tried

To take off this laprosy
Hanging around her
Producing rejection
She tried

To drown on thy vast
Of scented cologne of hers
To attract the attention of theirs
She tried

To overdose on pharmaceutical
At least they will besiege for life
Neither miracle to keep her alive
She tried

Of all that could come up to her mind
To end the misery deep within her spirit
She tried tried tried and tried million times
Yet she still felt like a loveless soul

Two hearts,
meant to beat as one
But yours beat for her
and someone else
Yet you say love isn't suppose to hurt

Your heart stopped beating out of
chest,
When you starred right through my
eyes,
And fail to notice you were racing
against the clock.

"I love you,
I love you too"
Yet the season came to an end,
Once they realised they were not meant to be

I tell you, sometimes love is never enough.

Out of all highways,
I driven on with no destination,
And finally finding one within your heart,
Took my eyes of the steering wheel.

Many years ago
On this very day
God allowed you
To share your loudest cry
Turning into a contagious smile

A visionary
A lover
A mother
Who even lost one of her breed
I call you a general with scars

Here I am
With the pen in my palm
Strolling smoothly like a silk cloth
Yet I thought the ink would be dry
But how will it dry on a special day,
When the poet only release what is buried deep inside?

He took my hand
Lead me to his bed
And I trusted him

Gave me sweets
Let me sit on his lap
And I smiled

He started to unbuttoned my dress
Touching my small rounded babies
Stroking my lips
While my smile faded

I tried holding on to my dress
Tears threatening my eyes
While looking through his eyes
As he turned into a monster

He continued to tore it into pieces
Rushing to take the underwear off
And finally I'm naked before him
As he bite his lip off now and then

Pushing me to the bed
Thrushing his ****
In and out of my well
Breathing heavily on top of me
Busy satisfying his quench

While I bled and bled
Staining his sheets
While he stained my heart
And took away my innocence
Maybe I didn't tell him to stop

I pushed myself to the mirror
Yet we looked at each other
With no recognition...