When I was a young boy, growing up in the
middle  of  Oklahoma, I  believed that  there
was right or wrong;  good or bad;  yes or no;
black or white.

It  was easy to  think that way.  How clever I
thought I was, to be so enlightened and decisive,
to have an opinion on everything and to think
I  was right. I wish  I didn't know now what  I
didn't know then.  

As I grew older I realized that sometimes there
is no right or wrong. That some situations have
no good outcome or happy ending. That the answer
can be both yes and no and that manifold factors
must be considered, and that some questions
have no answers.

I don't feel quite so clever anymore, but perhaps
grown wiser since I realized that life operates in
shades of grey and no one really knows the right
way. We all just have to keep going day to day,
doing what we feel is right.
                                                                                          Jon York   2031

When you found me I'd been through hell
I laughed and cried thank you to my saviour
I was surrounded and alone
Doing everything I could for people and draining myself
He hit me once, then twice, then again till I was nothing
He laughed and joked until I was a former shell
They ignored
He hit again

And you made me laugh for the first time in years
But now I see it was another painful illusion
You're not my saviour
You're my beautiful doom

I'll love you with everything in me
I'll love you with everything I have
I'll wait for you to have the time to talk to me
I'll wait for you if it means I get a kiss
Maybe a hug
Maybe even just a glance

We'll keep building our future together,
I'll keep losing myself to be who you need

You've been busy for a while
And that's okay
Why wouldn't it be
I've learnt to cope
Learnt you can live weeks of laughter without needing me
I'll learn to cope

But you were laughing with your friends whilst I was crying on the phone
You were talking to your friends whilst I was bleeding on the floor
You saw the tears and blood and went back to your game
You'll call me later, I'll be okay

So I'll be okay because that's what you need
I'll be happy when you text because that's what makes you happy
I'll free my nights in case you call to fall asleep
I'll free my days hoping for a miracle

But you were my saviour and I fell in love
Your smile, your voice, your laughter, happiness, face, beauty, personality
I fell in love
And we'll keep building our future, and I'll keep losing myself, my beautiful doom

I'll do anything for you
I'll live
I'll change
I'll **** myself trying
My beautiful doom

This is not romantic
It was never supposed to be
Maybe we can be healthy again
Maybe one day we can be okay
So I'll be hoping for a miracle
Before I **** myself for your future
My beautiful doom

You're my awful addiction
I'd let you break my heart every day
Just to see you smile

I may never have liked myself
But no matter what I went through
I was proud of who I had become

No matter the times
The temptation
I hadn't given up

I have always promised myself I'd never change myself for anyone
But for a fraction of your time
I'd rearrange every part of my being

And I don't know what's sadder:
The fact that I'd lose myself for you,
Or the fact you wouldn't even notice.

Feeling trapped under water,
Trying to get through the boarder.
In our social inequity
There's too much bigotry;
Wonder if we're just too nihilistic
                                   Artistic
Or if we're just too                      .
                                  Narcissistic
Either way it's their delusion,
Trying to fight through the illusion.
Did we ever have any proper hope?
Or was that all just another trope?
Arguing against our restrictions,
Wanting to change their decisions.
Equality - such a controversy!
Now we're on our knees begging for mercy.
How many more need to die?
Before you stop the blind eye.

Tears like pools streaming down our face,
Oh, we're such a disgrace!
Running around through an endless maze,
We're just trying to get out of our daze.
Can't you imagine a life any sweeter?
Or is that just too hard to rhetor?
Ignorance at every turn,
Aren't they ever going to learn?
We've had enough of this injustice!
Go find some other vices.
No longer will we be silent,
When standing in front of our tyrant.

We've been sitting here in cages
All since the dark ages;
Freedom only ever a concept
Well, that's sure been hard to accept.
How we've all been confined,
Whilst thinking the stars had aligned;
Trapped within ourselves -
We've just been searching the shelves.
How could we be so blind?
Surely, this isn't part of the grand design!
Making so many restrictions,
It's like their awful addiction.
We could all be so carefree,
If only we had any kind of guarantee!

I love you so much it hurts
Love isn't like this in the books
Or the movies
Or the songs
You're my only reason for being
Whilst I am something fun to play with when bored
You walk in the room and I am left no choice but to surrender
I forget anyone
Anything
I do this all for you
Your time and attention
Your words and intentions
Constant echoes that never leave my body
So sacred in everything you are and do
I am never happier or more alive than in your presence
And so as soon as you leave my side
All my wounds open back up
I'm replaced with a ghost
Bleeding and broken
Shattered into more pieces
Waiting for you to come and put me back together all over again
And we'll repeat our merry dance
Until I can no longer make you smile
Until I can no longer show you how much I love you
Until you have had enough of this game and chapter of life
And found someone new
Someone better
Someone whole
This is our Broken dance
Please don't leave me black and blue
Tell me what to do, so I can hold on to you