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Michael John Jul 2021
i am bored!
i am bored
as a ghost

dis-
disinterest
as burnt

toast-
tedium
dreary?!

(dum-di-dum..)
as a wet sunday
afternoon

in Dumfries*
ah,me
melancholy-

like contemporary
as poetry
as watching

the grass grow
as ancient
as bone
Michael John Jan 2019
i am grown an
extra head
the ten thousandth
grand

says lily but
petite
stay in
caustic

sand
i will knot
some
cotton

sew a
button
knot´s
keep

wicked
on
it´ s
toe..
Michael John Jun 2021
i am inspired
until
white found
or words

flit like extinct
birds
like love in
your eyes

i am ready to die
to bite dirt
and expired

remember you
love
and how much
much

it hurts
(the past
like clouds above
they would take that)

to create
to be like a god
to be-a star
but there is you.
Michael John Jun 2021
i am inspired
by time and
by the sparrows

i am inspired by
bugs
(i can not find)

-also communal
desire
fire

the power of
minds
napolean coste

trees
afternoon tea
dostoyevski

the pantheistic
nature of
the universe

polite people
some smile
miles

and miles
the sky
you and i

i am inspired
by leonard cohen
by bill and ben

the beginning
the end
and the little

bit betwixt
twix
cold milk

the word
ilk
elk

and whelks
kindness
the same

differences
obscure
references

i am inspired by
knowledge
(mahap,

my lack
there of)
the edges

of stuff
love
(but not

doughnuts)
snowdrifts
if,buts

and maybe
aunty mary
getting on

inspiration
never ending
never..
Michael John Jun 2021
i am inspired (part three)
by hogs
bruja
certain triptych
of bosch
bowie..

donkeys
reality
we
(now and when)
the fens
ah..

i am inspired
(by the odds
that it should
occur
in a universe
which thus far

has been
proved barren..)by
darren
daring
chutzpah
quiet communing..

nice..
ice,
the morning-
the swallows
interplay
in the agave..

let it be,pepe,
as it is-
an old friend
would say to me
but
cocco-nuts..

a bamboo hut
perched by the
surf
libraries
worth
the hearth..

good health!
elves
song
winter logs
fractions
hedgehogs..

chance meeting
life long friendship
ships
hips
james joyce..

rolls royce
i am inspired
by amelia

by d
minor seventh-
a first chord

the last word
inspire
inspiring
inspiration
inspires
in..
*a novel by yevgeny zamyatin
*testament d´amelia-miguel llobet
Michael John Sep 2018
i am lucky
i can see
or i can´ t..

is it new
like jamais vu
or deja vu..

old and beauty
the sun and moon
my room..

innocence and wisdom
love of you
true..

i am grand
i kiss the land
adoration..

i see my door
i can´ t see my door
for

i am old
i am new
golly, the rain

comes down
from my heart
to the ground..
Michael John Jan 2022
i am not
a pipe or ***
a monkey or sot
a dash or dot
a little or lot
a babe in a cot
why,when,or what
cold or hot
living rot
a distinct blot..

i am on the other
a fair listener
a brother
a sister
a mother
a father
further
nearer
hand sand
a magic wand
canned and
desparate dan
an avid reader
exotic and bland
black and tan
ollie and stan..

i don´t care much
for twits or aircraft
kits
wits
twix
that´s untrue
small bits
of stuff
too tedious to
go into
fascinate..

i am old and
young
i am dead and
gone
i am an acorn
a pagan
a lucky stone
amid seven billion
odd and even
i don´t hate
this seems strange
hate is healthy
like love
i worry
if i can´t hate
what..

i am musical
this is all
for me
i played the guitar
immedietly
and cant stop!
a top or head
the little girl beside
me was so enamoured
she said she would be my girl
friend
i started playing the
penny whistle at thirty
and harmonica some time
after
and then the violin and
drum in spain
the mandolin is fun..

i read poetry for thirty
year
before putting pen to
paper
sometimes i wish i
had not bothered
and sometimes i
am glad..
sad and
mad..

it is a point
but less
an ing with a
bless
i sky
i am at
sea
a bull
a lull
a sea gull
sea gulls..!!

i can tell you
something about
sea gulls
but what is the
point
i am resisting
smoke
i am empty
and full
i loathe thats
ok
killing time
bats are col
or cool or perhaps
anything that can
fly
loathe is somehow
lithe..
i like hats..

cats
rats
bats
fats
waller

cosy flats
welcome mats
pitter patt
rain in the
small wee hours
flowers

not so much
less a point
today i was thinking just
how worse
can it be
i think about the generation
lost in the first world
war
to die so young..
i got three books at the boot
sale or two, one is the prose
of pushkin
i like to read a short story
at breakfast
and something by the author
of cathy come home..homeless in
the uk in the sixties..
it puzzles me that the
richest country in the world
for a long time, had such
poverty..

but it does not pay to
dwell on such pain
i got three dvds-
some how an end
begins-
i watched marlene
ditrich as
a powerful russian queen..
clever trevor
and nina hagan
i can reccomend..
and jack london
the short stories there
of..
love is a suitable
finale..
Michael John Mar 4
i am not contrast my
metaphor friends
am i a dilly simile
nein..

do i dream, a polar bear
in the wild flower?-nix..
reality IS poetry
yes..!
Michael John Nov 2019
i am not surprised to exist
but since your first kiss
i have felt like a fish
on a flowered dish

or frozen in a waterfall wish
dirt poor and rich
hid on heaven´s niche
some strange terrible

itch
burns an unseen hole
that you hardly notice
came as no surprise
born into this*

you said
or something as equally
trite
or kitsch and
fell into
drunken oblivion
b....!

the title of a biography
of charles bukowski
Michael John Nov 2018
i

i am time surfer
i crawl through space
i am in your brain
in..

lily you are high
again..
witches ate that
pretty one..

i am inside
do not hide
i can read
your mind
they were burned

ii

lewd creature..
it is mushroom season
how ever
don´ t eat them
as you go along..

lol..i could nt wait
i met everyone
it was free and it
was fun..

as all the colours played
and my perception grew
or i thought it did..
from a far..

i spied the groundsman
strolling over
and dogs like magic
a lovely clear morning..

it is a short grass and
no frost
you lose something
no..

i put them in cider
i made spagetti
now you can get a kit
let my self not get
the better of me..


iii

lily pipes up
they are natural
god meant us to get
high..
that is so..

but not to ****
each other with
guns or sabre
or rock..

we hid and were
just prey
while searching
for magic
i found
friendly
interest..
Michael John Sep 2018
i am rather torn
when it comes to
suicide
on the one hand
it is one´s own
life
but on the other
this destruction
may spiral wide
reverberate
through time
gathering power
depositing
sadness
and despair
til the whole
world falls
asunder
beseeching
and to the
pretty
blue
i
we
you
they
cry why..!!

*a mention of suicide by
twigzy..
Michael John Sep 2021
i am to water the flowers
yet again
it begins to sting some
what
am i doing here
the birds sing..
well,what are you
doing here mf
your fine feather
shine in sun
superior
i hear you now
singing
it is for you
this earth spins
and we are to die..
Michael John Sep 2024
i and ii etc

mandible, i like
some words just
fiddle in the  brain

like too much mead-
a stranger in from the cold-
a penny a pint..

ii

(just so someone is
beautiful
means not i want

to put my
appendage in
their orifice..)

iii

two more words that
resonate like lover´s
first glance..

-their beauty may bore
them like a closing time
on a saturday..

iv

are you going to write
a poem, lily..?
i don´t know..

i have to clear my
mind-i am bogged
in the raw..
Michael John Aug 2018
i


i and you
fanciful and irregular
what to do
the sun a finger
indicates our hearts
old and new
you and i
lost and true
it blazed and bought
and embossed
through and through
love a found star
sure and constant
to be forever
to flit
across endless skies
you and i
i and you
know nothing
but this sun..
Michael John Aug 2021
i awake to yesterday
which is say
today

without but with
plenty
pray..
Michael John Jul 28
i bought this collection of
or selected poems by the great
sylvia plath

i don´t really know her well
but she was married to ted
a poet lauriette of the fifties

it was fifty cents from a boot
car or car boot and my first thought
as always was

how books have depreciated
it would be the best part of a poor man´s
wage back in victorian age

indeed if he could read..
books were honoured and loved
a golden age of literature..

in future what will be the equivalent?
i wondered..
but meanwhile i paid my 50 cent..
Michael John Oct 2024
i

but on the positive
there is belief-
more of interest-

soon to be proved or disproved..
last word..?
o what a world!?

and into the void!
no more pain and no
more me..

ii

no more mornings
and little birds singing
coffee and eggs

no more silence
no wondering what comes
next

no more the tedious washing
up or off to the office
no more music..

iii

or writing..
no more nonsense
indeed-

no more senses
where o where will
they be..

are we afeared
****,we have lived
well..a tree..
Michael John Jul 2018
i can do no right
i feel like a blight
every wrong so
movement..
no how silent
(if war became art!)
the sun and moon yet..
i feel a great debt..
i think soon be dead
the hare in the moon said
just a stop gapped
reborn and bled..
Michael John Aug 2018
i

i can put my nose in the air too
saying and who are you
and what do you do..
(ah, your way is true..)

ii

but i think i loose
pointless-elitism
a silly noose..

iii

in the end
a stuffed goose

iv

friend
my choice

v

your choice..
Michael John Nov 2018
i

i can see the join
i was mentally dis jointed
my mind had stopped
(but not a full stop..)

really i found a beginning
when it all began..
i considered my hand
long and long and..

ii

saw the gaps between
or what might be..
(well we all realize parallel
realities-heaven and hell-)

i thought that an odd place
gathered rainbows for tears
seemed like a fair trade
in my crib laid

iii

and a hex was hexed
and what occurred next
(solid lack of any syntax
who would credit that..)

not me..sleep little one
you can always pass on
within a curling digit
that that answers it..
Michael John Apr 2024
i can´t..
(no,you can´t)
does n´t matter

how clever..
well i might roam india
with loving bowl

shave my head
and save my soul
meet beautiful people..!

ii

like a blue bird
-life is magical
(that´s an option)

choice is imperative
open winged
through the midnight..
Michael John Sep 2023
i

i can´t eat brevity..or
severity
neither levity..

ii

nor poetry..
sincerity
too infinity..

iii

beauty-
bumble bees
may save us yet-

iv

sanity
sweet as honey
is there for asking..
Michael John Sep 2023
i can´t eat sincerity
but you look fine in
your red-beret..
you´ll share with me

that which is mine-
i have this generosity
all my life-
the cellulose covers

the razor blade..
blos-it tickles really!
this is your way...
we can laugh..
Michael John Apr 2024
i

i can´t eat your smiles
or your silences
(we have been down

this road..)
for how many years..
lily, here is reality-

ii

reality is boring-
in a tea-shirt-
you don´t work-

you don´t eat..
(and if there is no
work..?)

iii

we signed on-
about 19 pounds a
week..

a giro came once
a fortnight
usually on a friday..

iv

(we were lucky?!)
it was kind of boring
it was hard to know

what to do-
there was the punk
scene-

(about the only thing
that made me feel
young..)

a girlfriend slapped
me with a book-
crime and punishment

so i read it-guilt and
sickness but no internet-
the future looked grim..

v

war raged (unofficially
of course)
things got rather *****

i said eff this lily
and went to greece
where i knew nothing..
Michael John Jan 2019
i could have
done with a
little purpoise..

mostly, i felt
like a dolphin
sniffing mines..

but also not
a whale of a
time
tried not to carp

selfish
shellfish
eel pie
high

be off
cod
leave
love..
Michael John Jul 2020
i dedicated time to
learning
hours every day
so i could make
a living

hour after hour
every day
year in
and year out

at the beginning
of each decade
and
at the end

i said
i will
a way
devotion

try and
try
again

(i even
stopped
drinking)
then

and now?
now
..
.

ii

so as many
do
o!

a dream too
nothing new
no

go
gat a
job
boyo..!

iii
Michael John Mar 8
identity

look into
your mind
what will you find
something mean
something kind

some concrete
symbolic sign
some chattering teeth
an endless line
stretching to
infinity..

doobie hubris scroll
spider webs..me..
o i was wondering where that
got too..
vinegar or wine
some ancient hyroglyphic
for time..

look into your mind
a melody
that will not go away..
some fine sentiment-
a crutch a touch
the sun sets
plop!

have a look
some books
the odd cluck and
i mean odd
something too laugh
about-success
and failure..

what they told you as a child
i say blimey..
ambition..tradition to
**** a wren-
aliens and divers monster
uncle stan the dice man..

ii

that was then this is now
fear like some exotic twine
tie them together
what is in my mind-
(a ten per center..)
a little voice that i sometime hear
and sometimes ignore-

and sometimes say o dear
like a lazy lion-
looking out of my bars
upon the stifling plain
in the lonesome jungle
it says in a falsetto-
do  you remember..

and what if it all accrue
sigh-what if momento gathers
like a  runaway ooo
what if the variables go poo!
hey,we are out of here
and the inevitable is so-two
and two equals four..

run out of spine
a single line-
ah,the emperors new clothes
more and more the draught
has become  storm and room 101
is the generation game-
nice to see you..

what if i run out of stars
and fear the reaper or worse
a poet´s curse-
getting what they wants
there is little left
but that is the known universe
love is bereft
to a purse..
Michael John Oct 2020
I do not know if
the world has lied
i have lied
i do not know
if the world has conspired
i have conspired against love
the atmosphere of torture
is no comfort
i have tortured
listen,
even without the mushroom cloud
still,i would have hated
i will not be held like a drunk
under the cold tap of facts
i refuse the universal alibi..

like an empty telephone booth
passed at night and remembered
like mirrors in a movie palace lobby
consulted only on the way out
like a nymphomaniac that binds a thousand
into a strange brotherhood
i wait for each one of you to confess..

Leonard Cohen
Michael John Nov 2019
i don´t know if i can wait
i don't know if i can die
do i believe in fate
(life a lover´s sigh..)

i do try not to fear
my eyes unborn star
while outside rain falling
and leonard reads his poems..
Michael John Apr 6
i don´t know what to say
to you-(a suitable epitaph)
belief is poetry

(cry or laugh..)write yourself
or leaves of grass!
to infinity and beyond!
i think that is buzz lightyear..!
Michael John Mar 2022
i dont like you
but you are entitled
to your sad existence
(such as it is)

and if you choose to
cry about it
while you goose step
with pointy finger

then,a quick and
speedy death,
my friend, and
that is kind..
Michael John Nov 2019
i dream about you
dreamt about you
i dreamed about you
dreaming about you

how i loved you
how i love you
loving you
love

you
waking
woke
waked
wake..
Michael John Jul 2023
i dreamt about a poem
not i dreamt a poem
note-how the world hangs
upon a word

from to on in
little things
but such a difference
exist-ence..
Michael John Jul 2023
i dreamt about a poem
to my knowledge
i have not  

the grey sun
the little birdies song
i awoken to one..
Michael John Jul 2023
i dreamt about a poem
it was someone else
their opening
birth and death

they went to heaven
meanwhile
i am waiting
clueless and adrift..
if
Michael John May 28
if
if i never go to ikea
then i will die happier..
if
Michael John Apr 13
if
if-
if you save a life
are you owed or are you
responsible for
what they go on
to do..

lily is writing a speech
she has been asked to make
a night-club appearence

and say a few words-
seems a little heavy..
if not a trifle clumsy..

try again..
if you saved my life
am i for-ever in your debt

or r u responsible for
all the pain and suffering..
all the hate..

no,who said anything about
hate-
if..perhaps i wanted to die

perhaps i save the world
somehow..
perhaps, i should never

have been born..
how some random act of
philantrophy may

save us all-
some bravness or act
of sacrifice-

(like incident at vichy-)
to they who save my life
eternal grace..

should it occur-
do you think lily
the tone is set for a dance

under the plastic trees
bubbles and night of
fun..
if,
Michael John Oct 2023
if,
i

if, poetry is the way
the world could be
where as science is-

both are ego-trips-
i think it is the buddhists
believe enlightenment

begins with the death
of the self-sharing is
true-wealth..

(does it include the
spliff-i interject
acidly-)

lily..

ii

giggles and says,
lambs-sake, where are
my manners?

do you indulge, paul?
no-beer,wine..?
water, where life

began..she is new age
pagan any-hows..
well,we have no doctrine

it is up to us..
you know,like pick and
mix..

at woolworths..
woolworths doesnt exist
do you think god exists,paul..

well,i was cynical
but the positioning
of earth sun and moon

and my children..
we are all children and
somehow the same..


iii

our belief is one primarily
of light
same..

the seasons change
the universe
a church..

cathedral
the love and worship
of natural

one glass of water
energy flowing
a feather-

but numbers,paul-?!
the cabal-
your thoughts..?
Michael John Sep 2024
if you can´t enjoy yourself-
if you can´t speak the truth
if you can´t breath
if you can´ t be..

lily reads some wolfe-
suddenly,the image blazed
to the structure of hard actuality
another bar..
and all around hoarse laughter
high,sanguinary voices
a sudden scheme of faces scarred of night and
vivid with night´s  radiance..prostitutes
taxi-drivers...and those other nameless,unmistakable ones,
who come from somewhere-god knows where
and who live somehow-
god knows how-
and who recede again into morning
into unknown cells but who live here only,
brief as moths and balefully as a serpents eye
in the unwholesome chemistry of the night..

she says she like wolfe
i read him too
he tells the truth
in poetic words
hard to put down..
Michael John Jul 8
if we don´t pay our musicians
and artists then we´ll end up
with a load of has-beens and
glorified karaokes´..

(o dear, lily has donned her hat
of controversy..)she says she is
feeling nutritionally-challenged-
hungry..

what is for breakfast?(i recall
baked-beans on toast
over an open fire..in the olive grove
a car seat our pride and joy..)
Michael John Feb 7
if or if i knew then
what i know now..
or if i had my time over
would i do it different..?
too platitude a platitude
(or two..)

yes, i would barricade myself
into a windowless basement
with an impressive array of
weaponry-something for hand to hand
and close quarters-supplies-an extensive library-
and perhaps a poison tooth
as a last line of defence..

i will be your man friday whispers lily
paint the sky with stars
and sing softly in your ear-
for the love of anyway..
if..how life can turn on a dime..
Michael John Aug 2020
i

if deferred
another word
but
or

absurd
tut
can
am

i
mother
sky
purred

such glory
birth
or dying
see

hear
an infinity
in
the bird

song
(hit-****)
in the
agave..

ii

fallen tree
ah me
on a dime
everything

everyone
must
(secret-
tusk)

love ridden
unbidden
thus
be..

iii

i say none
asked
first
or last

spaced
´tween
the branches
nothing

laced
won or lost
your hand
after

all these years
still precious
teeth gone
hair

gone
what now
if then
deferred..
Michael John Sep 2017
i feel a lot younger now
then when i did i was ten
i try to think of one reason
but can´t think..

2-perhaps that is it..
all my intuition gone..
that ancient reason..
i have developed so..

into a modern man..
lifted my pagan heart
for a logical land..
3-off to a complete start

4
til death do us part-
the circle is completed..
little by little
apart..

away and once
back and forward
but always the same
the key to the prison

shines in my mind
old young
once a man
twice a child..
Michael John Apr 18
i feel i should complete
this minor trilogy lily
(but  if you are of a
sensitive disposition
then,do not read on..)

i am torn between the vague
easily distorted by time!
we were twenty and the alarmingly
specific-the details unnecessary-
and the forgotten..

wht..or why because no one cares
and half a story untold..
well,we had got to the vinegar strokes
(as i believe they are known-)
dog on pretty dog-my pretty madamoiselle
parlez-vouz and me..

when the police came along..
what do you think you are doing
and you can not do that here
self-evident in the first case and
au contraire-the moon on the ocean
the breeze in the palms
the white sands night soft and fragrant..

like the gentlemen that they were
they turned their backs as we dressed
pulling my trousers on i fell down and fell
asleep in the cool sand was paradise-
to be rudely awoken with a long stick..
when he began searching the sand for
our stash..

crunch-crunch-i can still hear as
he got closer and i tried not to look
this could get complicated..
so i looked at her..though she was not
really there..just too beautiful looking out
to sea as penelope must have waited..
crunch-crunch but  it stopped..
you will go to prison for a year..

(i had read of such things in the tabloids..)
we all stopped and looked at her
but she was not there..a pre-raphaelite
sight-still and innocent..we are all just prisoners
of our own device-and everyman lives behind bars
of his own making or something..

then born of desparation, inspiration..!
ok..we go to the station..but i should say
my father..lol..is a big man (which was true)
at the embassy and i want a phone call..!
**-**-you are good man(not true)..in my
best oxbridge which is prety good..
and they left us..after a long silence she
turned to me and said..what happened..?
and we got on with part two..
when i was young..
Michael John Jun 2024
if football or music is war
then,what hope is there?

if police are gangster
the ice-cream-man warrior..

a towel on a chair..
a colour..

a book to fire
history or

geography
hey,what is yours

is yours and
what is mine is mine-

trade-love and
hate-misunderstanding..

if..
Michael John Apr 2024
if i am bored
i think of colour
nothing in paticular..
Michael John Dec 2018
if i could
cast some
cold light
which would
burn a hole
deep in your
heart from
afar off star
leaden a glide..
then i
look out my
eye grin out
and what did
everything there
is here doubt
fear and blight
weasel dome
all known-
that red lid
peeled off
until less
scars and more
the hollow
cries mercy less
in your down
tender and like
a cheese grater
i stare out as
no more endures
and shiver jelly
grey and dead
surround..
(yes..i have a
raison d´etre..)
Michael John Apr 2021
i)

if i die today
i would consider
myself fortunate
to have lived
thus long..

that is to say,
the intro wired
to a fugue state
sad and loved
a lost song..

till twenty
unnamed
so waited
nearly died
nearly gone

many ways..
many..
(you know?!
like you
who knows

not me..)
then,
suddenly
i was there!
but where?
one..

ii


two
three
four
not much of a future
done-

what to do?
i see
or saw
tenses
tense
oh,tense-

shoulder
ear
here
and then
now
ow!

how to be
who knows
not i*
if i die to today
upon my stone-

say-
a question
perhaps some unheard
and star distant
exclamation-

some thing..
well i died
and lived
all the same
pray-

perhaps,
i was lucky
or as angels
maybe
i made my own
who knows?!
* Not I,by Samuel Beckett
Michael John May 15
if it were to me
there´d be no gravity
and my heart where it should
be..

would be..
if it were up to me..
and we´d fly free..!?
the vista to be-lieve..
faith a tree..

but it is not..the pavement
hot-polystyrene caught ´tween
earth and heaven..
blackest of raven, my heart..
Michael John Aug 2023
if i were to save your life
do you owe me
or am i responsible
for the rest of it..

***,says lily-
collect two hundred pounds for
passing go or
go directly to jail..

beyond love or
words-
the throw of the
die-in the lap of the gods..
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