the thing is i hate that i still love you
i hate that i still want your opinion and need to tell you everything and care about what you have to say because the truth is I deserve so much better than you.
you are terrible to me.

i hate that i miss you and i feel like ill die with you

i wish i didn’t care about your happiness because the truth is you’re a bad friend and an even worse person and you don’t deserve to be happy

you don’t deserve redemption or a chance at happiness

i hate you because you made me hate myself

all those sleepless nights and minutes spent picking myself apart in front of the mirror and moments i spent rocking myself in bed at night because i was too heartbroken and insecure is because of you

for one second of your narcissistic life i wish you took a good hard look in the mirror and realized the terrible person you’ve become.

you’ve destroyed all the good things in your life and you don’t even care

one day you’ll be drunk and alone surrounded by people who don’t love you as much as we did and realize that your life is meaningless  and the empty solo cups around you are held by people who really don’t give a **** about you, but by then we will have moved onto bigger and better things

i don’t know how you live with yourself knowing that your heart has turned to ice and no matter how many times I bang on it trying to get through to you it never thaws and I’m the one left wondering what I did to make you forget about me…

i don’t want to see you because of how much it hurts my heart and I don’t want to hear you because it reminds me of how much you took from me and I don’t want to think about you because you don’t deserve me.

i wish i could hate you but i can’t

i’m sorry you **** so much because i really wish you didn’t …

i love u so...

you are my best friend

i couldn’t live without you and every breath i take is better when its with you

when I’m around you my stomach twists into knots and my tongue ties up and my face flushes because you make me nervous and excited all at once

i can imagine your smile without closing my eyes and i can trace the crinkles on your face in an instant

my heart quickens when I’m with you and when we go without talking  i can’t focus

when I’m not with you i crave to be and when I’m with you i can’t control myself because I’m so utterly in love with you

i would move mountains to make you happy

the words don’t exist yet to describe the way you make my nerves jolt and my arms to shiver and my thoughts to be so jumbled with even the thought of

you,
beautiful you,

because you are my everything

the magnitude of my love for you bursts through the spectrum of the universe leaving me to contemplate how i can explain to you the way you make me feel

i long for when we talk because you make me laugh and my heart fills with joy

you know me better than i know myself and i don’t know what id do without you

my life is more beautiful with you in it

id rather die than live in a world without you..

how do i measure my love for you?

i measure my love for you in the number of sunrises and sunsets i watch with you

i count the number of deep belly laughs that reverberate around the room when I'm with you

i measure my love for you in the countless dreams I've had about the future we will have together and the possibilities for a lifetime of happiness and family and friends

i measure my love for you every time i feel your slender fingers intertwined with mine and your breath whispering in my ears

i measure my love for you
when we dance in the rain in our pajamas playing 80s jazz on the stereo,

when we lie on the cool sand late at night drinking lukewarm coffee from the 7/11,

when we go ice skating on the pond in the depths of the winter, clutching onto each other, giggling like school girls as we slip around

when we wake up on the couch Sunday mornings with the credits from the movie we fell asleep to rolling in the background and the hazy light of the TV flickering

i measure my love for you in a thousand ways i can't even describe because all the words i dictate are promises to protect you and all the actions i perform are to do everything in my power to make you happy...


...even our worst days together are still an infinite amount better than they would be if I didn't have you

My blood runs red in my blue veins
I feel just as you do, exactly the same
Cut me open and see inside
That which is in me is beautified
So as with you, our hearts are all true
Irrespective of the color that our skin exudes

If you were to hurt me would I not cry ?
Asking you forgiveness, the reason why
Just as you would if you were to die
Be judged by the same man in the sky

Do we not love and fear?
Hope and dream for all things?
That this life would be gentle and kind
That we might live and learn unconfined

We are born and we die in the exact same way
Are similarities not enough to keep a color war at bay?
Skin, hair, money, status and power
Are these the things we fight for that will slowly devour us?

I search for a world where this will no longer matter
That for this reason no more blood shall splatter
When the color of my skin will not make me less of a person  
But rather a sister to love and trust in

I want this world to see through the my eyes
See what it means to truly accept and thrive
What we could be if only we stopped fighting
It would be love and life uniting.

when Mankind is your muse
its always going to be autobiographical

Darkness, do not part
Gloom the ocean of my mind
Stars, do not shine bright
Bitter water, veil his life
Suffocate my memory