she is a hostage to her own emotions she is a trainwreck that
causes traffic she is missing in action she is relentless she is insomnia
she is depression she is a 10 paged project that you wait
last minute to start her skin spells out different words that no
one can pronounce, but they ryhme with insecurity and
anorexia her favorite color is a mix between lilac and gray
her favorite flowers are nonexistent because she is the
type of girl to grow flowers where only weeds grow
she is unknown to everyone she meets she is a whisper
among violent storms she is a catastrophe among smiling faces
she is not a metaphor she is not a simile she cannot
be put into words she cannot be broken down into language
if you cut her she will not bleed instead she will cover it up
with a sad smile and the same phrase she always uses: I'm fine
(h.l.)

Sometimes I feel as if my heart's not in place,
As if it's jumped from my chest straight up to my face
It starts out slow, crawling inch by inch
Up to my neck with a squeeze and a pinch
It squeezes my thoughts and brings tears to my eyes
But they will not fall, I cannot cry
Then I see your face and my heart stops it's climb
It's tight in my neck, no more are you mine
My muscles tense up as I turn my head right
And my heart moves again, this is not the end of the fight
It's now in my throat and my breathing's reversed
This ride must be over, my heart's bout' to burst
I miss you, I miss you, more than you know,
More than the sun shines, on untouched snow
More than the trees miss the summer glow
More than I wish I had so long ago,
And I walk away, I walk away slow
Like a man with no heart where yours should go
My Heart's still up in my throat sending beats through my soul
These beats fall loudly, a heart deafening stroll
They tell me things that I already know,
With you, Without you,
I will never be whole

you came up behind me,
wrapped your arms around
my neck and covered
my eyes with your hands.

"guess who?" you asked.

and how silly, i thought,
it was to think that i would
not know you by the
feeling of your heartbeat
against my back.

I don't understand what you want from me.
Do you want me to be gentle and kind all the time,
or tough and defensive?
Do you want me to act like a lady,
or a young girl with a wicked sense of humor?
Do you want me to be comforting,
or to give you your space?
I'm getting so many mixed signals.
None of it makes sense.
Tell me what you want,
and I will be that for you.