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Tsunami Mar 2018
the first time
i was 15
hands grabbed my budding *******
a warm breath on my neck

the second time
i was 18
he flipped me over
held me down
after he questioned why i bled

the third time
i was 21
he told me to be good
that he wanted me to make him proud
off came my shirt
forced my mouth to do things i didn't want

hands feel like boulders even now
/nothing ever changes/
tongues feel like battering rams
/i am estranged/
it's like i have a neon sign pointing at me
/i feel deranged/
saying "hurt me"
in flashing lights
the chances of being assaulted are doubled for victims. http://www.wavaw.ca/donate/
Tsunami Mar 2018
her
The galaxy
The aurora borealis
The deep sea
It's what she's always been
Tsunami Feb 2018
One day,
I will write a book
He'll claim it is about him
“Why couldn't you get over me?”
“Why are you still stuck in the past? This was years (months, days, minutes) ago”.

I’ll say it's about how you made me feel,
How you left me.
How you broke me,
Then made me pick up the pieces.
How you ****** me,
Told me you loved me.
Choked identical words out of me.
Deserted me.

I wrote a book about loving someone despite everything he had done to me.
Encompassing me
Hurting me.
Not him.
hating someone is better
Tsunami Jan 2018
The first time we kissed ,
Our teeth knocked together.
You told everyone
this little fact

But you didn't tell them
Of our stolen kisses
Alone in the dark.
Whispers of how we wanted each other,
Whilst drunk off of cheap liquor.

You didn't fill them in on
If you ever liked me or not.
i write a lot about the same person. I hope hes doing ok
Tsunami Jan 2018
I see you every time I pass a place of old memories.
My eyes try to blink away the tears
His love was treachery
A ****** up affair

The scent of you
Earth and musk
Lingers in the breeze
Dawn to dusk

I taste you
On the tip of my tongue
(It’s kind of like a tattoo)
At the back of my throat
(God, we were young)

Your hands traveled
Down a lace thong
Unraveled my heart
Along with a black bra

I still hear your voice
Sighing words into my skin
Ringing alarm bells in my ears
Divulging secrets to my eager grin

My eyes have been overcast since the day you left
Reminders burned into my fovea centralis
(birthdays, favorite cigarettes, us undressed)
My sclera turned into translucent glass
All I hear is relentless noise
Or mindless buzzing
All I taste is alfalfa sprouts and chouse
I catch your cologne
Performing ballet in my clothes
(I should have known)

You always enjoyed
Feeling the drumming of my empty heart
Pumping blood to five senses that dance
To the beat of broken abstract art
i got my heart broken and it still hurts
Tsunami Jan 2018
I carry a coat
Filled with my past
Its has old notes
Scrawled across like signatures on a cast

I have spirits living in the pockets
Demons sinking in through moth eaten holes
They whisper your name in sonnets
Convey and disclose

This cloak
Is ancient
Is heavy
The apparitions do nothing but reminisce

Mummi despised
wearing clothing belonging to the deceased
“It is bad luck to not let bhoots subside”
She spoke at me
Rather than directly to her beti
But what of the ghosts I am forced to wear mother?
When will they leave?
Beti= daughter
Bhoot = ghost
Tsunami Jan 2018
Time is a human construct.
It will spill numbers on the floor,
Whilst it slips its fragile hands around your throat.
Choking you out,
Until breathing becomes more of a chore than reality.
Until it feels like you’re drowning from the carbon dioxide swimming in your veins.

The clock is the home that stutters away when you get to close.
It’s the boy who tells you he loves you,
And then never calls.
It’s the sound of your ribs snapping in half,
Simultaneously filling your lungs with ambrosia.
So that when you take your final breath,
Time will be there to remind you that no matter what,
You were never ******* enough nor ever really there.

Time is the intruder that breaks in
Steals your youth, your drive, your ******* life.
Erasing you slowly,
As I’ve done to every minute since I saw the universe in your eyes.

But, god, what would we do without time,
How would we subsist without measuring cosmos in our hands?
How am I supposed to live without the warmth of your body next to mine?
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