first
you ignore your medication
to feel healthy

then
you break hearts
to make yours mend

soon
you smoke your cigars
to breathe easy

but not until after
you empty your stomach
to feel full

before you know it
you're slitting your skin
to patch yourself up

eventually
you **** yourself
to feel alive

and
you smile
to hide the sadness
that never goes away

self-destruction
is the only non-destructive thing I know
for it keeps me alive
while driving me insane