I feel like my poems have just become a list of complaints but how can I find the beauty in this storm?
No church has ever heard as many prayers as that hospital room that night.
Your life hung in the house like a crucifix or an old family photo.
HOW DID YOU EXPECT ME TO GET THROUGH THIS?????
Did you think your absence would make anything better?
It hurts.
It's killing me.
You left in paragraphs. You said I'd be fine.
But when you left you took me with you.
Now my bathroom floor knows more about me than I do.
Now I see you everywhere. In the halls, in your sister's eyes, our coffee shop. oh God that coffee shop.
Your presence still paints the walls there.
The coffee isn't strong enough anymore.
All I taste is you.

Your tongue could start forest fires
With the songs you sing, you could spring winter forward.
You could taste like tomorrow, your trials could all be amounting to counting sheep next to me.
Your little words wrinkle foreheads and cause the catastrophes of nations.
You with little breath bring forth the wildest of worries from the wandering minds.
You of little touch take armfuls of truth and tackle the tortured.
You with mostly full mouth make magic when you tap your tongue against the roof of your mouth
Your rough and ragged hands rust around the edges like the sounds you make when the laugh escapes your raging soul.
You hold onto hope like masters picking up pieces, you could make peace with your mouth piece.
Picking at the scabs on your fingers, focusing on us.
On the ground they avoid you.
You with the sunken skin and swollen eyes – ******* on the end of that cigarette.
You’ve convinced yourself it’s all a good dream.
Days musty like the back of your car when we drive on the high way wondering which way we go.
You with time tattooed soul – sulking about the little time you have.
Holding onto the fear you foster under your ribs.
You with the smile I’d rush rivers to keep under my pillow
You twist your tongue around my image – wake to find me further from grasp.
Smoking grass holding onto the hash.
Hoping you have an interest in me.

I want to be Fire.

I want to burn,
To lick and hiss
and defy all odds.

I want to last,
To never die even when a swarm of people
From near and far,
Scream, fling, shout
At me,
Still then,
I will burn,
Destroy everything that works against me.

I want people to stop and stare,
Admire my beauty,
Come so close to it,
But being too scared to touch.

I want to engulf,
To incinerate
Anything that stands in my way.
The smoke from my success
Should paralyse.

I want to be Fire,
Even when I think I’m dying out,
i want my flames to rise again and again.

I am jealous
Because he is the poison
In your bloodstream

He is the darkness
That haunts you at 2 AM
When you're falling asleep

I wish to be the one
Who keeps you up at night
Making you think of ruined futures

two coffees
shaking hands
racing pulse
cancelled plans

cold apartment
lonely tears
boring reruns
empty beers

quiet room
unmade bed
took all the pills
now she’s dead

The last time we kissed
I broke out in hives
from the honey on her breath
and the sting of her lies.
I swear, I'd die a thousand deaths
if she were the queen of my hive.