The ***** of my eyelids fall,
delicately dripping onto my cheekbones,
powdered, ripe with a pink flush,
matching the creamy pigment I smooth
between my lips before a cacophony
of laughter runs up my throat and out
my mouth. My lashes, black, have been curled
neatly in a spiral that follows my green irises,
my gaze landing on your hands—
but that’s not it.

Just know, I am more than a pretty face.
I am more than the picture you have in your head
of the clothes peeling off my body
like a cocoon—watch me morph—
in the dead of your blackness, calling sweetness
to the surface. I am more than this exaltation.
I am more than the late night phone calls
or the kisses on your cheek.
I am in the breath you lost when I smiled, and I

am in the scratches on your back, the fickle
end of the lock you latched. I am in the noise
that fuzzes in your head, the empty space
haunting you in your bed. I am more
than what you expected—
but that’s not it.

I am also the beat behind these words, the puddle
that gathers from the spill on the floor. I am the mind
that molds. I am the truth that finds. I am the beginning
of every bitter end. I am more than a pretty face.
I am the exhale at the end of the race. Here I am.
I am the kind of hurt that’s still sore, and one day
I am going to be so much more.

I remember your breath,
In the room without death,
You were ranting so strange with your hands.
Stroking your hair,
In the perfumed air
While the blossoms
Lay still on your land.

And those were the days,
And that was our world,
We were running from the filth
And the cash.
And I was in love
With your eerie kind soul,
I still have your
White ribbon sash.

But you weren’t aware,
With the books in your head,
Amongst the butterflies drifting around.
You weren’t aware,
With your bright shining hair,
Just sleep now,
You’re sleeping now,
Just sleep now,
You’re awake now,
Your fingertips gracing the ground.

I remember your breath,
In the room without death,
Your jewels useless,
They lay on the mat.
We sat and we sang,
Ignoring the bang,
As the prisoners were shot through their hats.

And then closing your eyes
From the outside noise,
That tried to sneak up under the door.
You sighed out a song,
You said ‘God no more’
I have lived well
Though I didn’t live long.

And you floated away,
Like a white feathered moth,
Your face
It was warmed by the sun.
You floated away,
On that tropical dusk day,
You’re asleep now,
Please just sleep now,
You’re asleep now,
A constant dream now,
Stop feeling the earth down

It’s done.

This love is reckless
This love is closed doors that
only open for oxygen
This love is driving without headlights
This is I feel like I'm crazy kind of love
This is I never want to be away kind of love
This is I stay up late kind of love
You have a kiss like a forest fire
You once called me a match
I am no longer afraid of the dark
because you taught me that
darkness only covers up the wrong
It is a security blanket for our past mistakes
For our past lovers
We no longer listen to the voices that bring us down
because this love is our latter to the top
This love is reckless
and I would rather live a life
without seat belts
if you're the one driving

I am the one that saves you from pointing your finger at yourself
because every time you pass by I remind you of your perfection
you read of me in the daily news and make judgements all the time
so much so you have no time at all to make changes to yourself and in so doing, change the World, for the better.

is what i am
(and what you gave to me)