Tormented from the inside out

I've put an end to my distress

Wishing to be consumed by it all

Weakening an introspective expression

My beating heart shatters...

Illusions haunt my sanity

The remedy, mythical.

Widowed through a shadow

Dusk seeps over the silvery skies

My horrendous nightmare becomes reality.

I scream uncontrollably while I gasp for air

As I fall to the ground, I notice nothing is there.

Suffocation in my bare skin.

Scarlet puddles flood the open space.

My soul intoxicated as I laugh in my deep sleep.

Toxins enter deep into my body
Gasping from the poison
My world is beginning to fade
I don't remember why I am here
My heart hardened
I have shut everyone out
I yearn to be alone
I feel as though I am being ****** in
I am losing this fight with myself
My tears slowly drop to the ground
As my days pass I think of the deceit
Why did I believe it?
I wish I had the answers to these emotions
Gradually I have noticed an inner change
I am not the same exuberant soul I was as a child
Memories from the past mark my death
I desire to be someone new
My temper unexplainable
Fed up with irritable questions I cannot fathom
I tense while receiving the spiteful words thrown at me
I am unsure of my mental stability
I crave acceptance
This is what I bare throughout my existence.

You know the day I died
I never ventured far from home
I never performed miracles
I never went to Rome
You know me through the stories
The disciples told my tale
I am surprised that I am famous
But at one thing I did fail
I don't think that I am holy
By some, but I am known
By different names by different groups
This, history has shown
You know me from the bible
Yes, I died upon the cross
But, when asked just what my real name is
Then most are at a loss
I was crucified, a true fact
My beliefs cost me my life
I died there in the sunshine
My story filled with strife
I know you think you know me
But, do you really know
That at my crucifixion
I was the first one in the row
Like I said, I am as famous
As the middle one who died
I knew you would not guess me
No matter how you tried
My name, it is Saint Dismas
I am the thief just to the right
Jesus Christ was in the middle
He was full of heaven's light
I am known in all the stories
Like I told you once before
I'm known as the good thief
I am known in all the lore
I died the same as Jesus
I died the same as he
Luke called me Saint Dismas
Now you will remember me

My fears are simple...
Not shrewd enough or dextrous
My love divine, yes majestic
My purity maintains as my objective
My faith steady in my beliefs
Striving to be worthy at his throne
Virtuous and righteous I will become
My scars swept away with justice and unity
Victory through Him who has created me
Devotion and warmth to those in need
Repenting of my sin in prayer
Kneeling down with compassion and hunger

My mind is consumed.

Drifting through the shadow of fear
As I protect you beneath these tears

With each tiny kick taken by surprise
Your delicate sillhouette I have come to recognize

Taking one step at a time to shape you
My angel, this is what my life has come to

Anguished spirits have withered to an end
With overflowing strength my heart offers to extend

Enhancing life with a lusterous glow
Emry Rene, always follow your heart and never let go

Confide in me, your feeling deep inside
While your path may change, you will never have to hide

Never let the worlds charming facade deceive you
I will stand by your side as we depict the view

I LOVE YOU EMRY RENE LLAMAS! <3 MOMMY

My destiny was you
Seeping through the spectral as if timelessness was true

Both our souls shaping  into one
Illustrious adoration, this breath of life you have won

Each remedy chosen to reanimate fierce infatuation
Our existence concluded by a simple foundation

A euphoric perception through your warm almond eyes
In the worst of this battle I will never say  my goodbyes

Bonded by a sweet bundle of responsibility
Restless nights have shown our ongoing capability

Holding on to my weakest affection
My fears will let go of your delicate imperfections

Where has this animosity seized us to?
Reminiscing back when passion was all we knew.