What if life is just a video game?
- or a feature film told frame by frame
What is our single aim?
- to seek respect, fortune and fame.
How many golden coins make a life?
How many respect points for a house, kids and wife?
What if we choose to wander off the path?
- to play it just for kicks and a laugh.
Is the character i inhabit just a mask?
- to hide from realities grasp.

How long must i continue to play life's game?
- constantly running from danger rather than facing the pain.
Sometimes I drift through levels with ease
or sit here wondering will it ever cease
if only real life was simple as entering cheat codes
or switching over to an easier mode
so I can have invulnerability and never get hurt
instead of sitting here on constant alert
sometimes i wonder why I've opted to play
when i can just eject myself from life's disc tray.

For Mario his main aim is to rescue Peach
likewise my true love is out of reach
not in distance and time
but in resistance of mind.

...and so the end credits begin to roll
as the hero nears his goal
but the many battles have taken their toll.

Yet still one final boss left to destroy
what tactics shall I employ?
- go out in a blaze of glory
and explode like a supernova
Thus is the end of the story
no life left, game over.

Love is the only reason we exist
yet love can be a dagger to the heart that twists
the thinly veiled confusion of mist
of emotions mixed.
Unquestioning devotion to another
I'm not talking about the love for your sister or brother
but the kind of love that sets us on quests
the kind of love that is never second guessed
for it's with such certainty that I possess
to conquer all obstacles in my path
as I can accept nothing less
then the true love that lasts.

Surely my heart does not waiver
it's my mind that cannot savor
or comprehend
where love does wish me to send
for I am a slave to my brain
yet its my heart that does aim
a tortured beast
captured by beauty
torn in two and not released
contained within a cage
oh what my heart does crave
not more words upon a page
but the heat of breath
a brush of skin
a touch of flesh
a taste of sin.

Everything else is just a distraction
from my hearts true satisfaction
as I was created in love
and it's to love I shall return
this is not a lesson you can learn
it cannot be taught
as only experience does teach
from experience your heart is reached
and does swell
for it possesses every fibre and cell
all senses from taste to smell.

With love I may die a thousand times
but without it I die a thousand more
for what is life without its core
our very being
as I forgo all senses seeing
just for my heart to love again
and another word I shall not pen
if once more your love will send
or my life you may forever end.

Always thinking
what am I thinking?
lets start writing
should be sleeping
why am I thinking?
I need to sleep now
bored of sheep, lets try cows
maybe I should count the spots
or connect the dots
of my thoughts....

Dalmatians are the cow canine
ten, eleven, twelve
deeper I delve
sleeper I'm not
wide awake, no
half baked dough
money makes the world go round
funny how it doesn't make a sound
yet people are so loud
it's not needed
nod your head when greeted
nod your head when agreeing
or leaving, deceiving, grieving
maybe thats bowing
bow your head when grieving
Robin Hood had merry men
and they were thieving
still need to be sleeping
dreaming........

If only I could dream of you
as we sail the ocean blue
you would get sea sick
and I would drown quick
this is how my dreams end
much like our relationship
conscious thoughts
maligned with nonsense fraughts
I fraught of you today
tonight, this night
every night
you my light
my darkness
my rainbow
tied around your neck
so delicate
a pretty little thing
no tongue ring yet
butterflies
toast lands sunny side
glass half empty
I'm half fool
a joker in the pack
Batman that's a fact
I only come out at night
your caped crusader
I tried to save her
but the current dragged her under
she now resides in the depths of my mind
a shipwreck
my Mary Rose
how I loved your eyes and nose
and everything attached
did I remember to put the door on the latch?
turn off the oven
come give me loving
and affection
Marvin Gaye, Joan Armatrading
sing to me so I can sleep
sheep, cow, dalmatian, sheep..........

Back and forth it goes around the room
been here all day and now its noon
just me and my homies laid back, relaxing
each one of us lyrically waxing
as we take turns to do a line
heads down to the grind
eyes are looking a little puffy
**** this work makes you hungry
got me some major munchies
as I grab another pretzel
writing poetry with a blunt pencil.

We are all following footsteps in the dirt
all hiding from the hurt
just running scared
they told us to be prepared
but prepared for what?

How can you prepare for the unknown?
for who knows what grows from the seeds we sow
the future is uncertainty
when dealing with reality
all plans are futility
as we free-fall to gravity
through the clouds
its all just sights and sounds.

Beyond every horror and darkened room
just round the corner death does loom
but death is nothing, what ceases to exist
how can you be scared of nothing, why do you resist?
One day those footsteps will suddenly end
and there will be no reason left to pretend
in that moment it will all be clear
that the footsteps you were following was actually fear.

I am a born writer
a worn out fighter
constantly battling my demons
frequently finding the reasons
to creep on going
to keep on flowing
29th round
and the sleeps now showing.

A persistent tiredness
an insistent wired finesse
Standing here battered and bruised
feeling shattered and used
a product of my stress.

A demons play thing
seasoned in the ring
resting on the ropes
jesting at my hopes
now running on reserve
dulling every nerve.
So I no longer can feel
the pain of my ordeal.

As my body aches
with signs of cramp
another blow he takes
its not over champ!
More blows sorely landing
it shows I'm barely standing
shaken and stunned.
Ding! Ding!
another round done.

As vultures start to circle like flies
she stares into a dying mans eyes
his vision blurred, eyes swollen and glazed
any memories left have already hazed
he opens his mouth as if to speak
she leans in close and touches his cheek.

"Now i'm at my journeys end
no lover left for me to tend
a broken heart that will not mend"
--"no next of kin all alone
just worn out skin and dried up bone
all thats left has turned to stone"

She grasps his hand to her chest
knowing its his final rest
she squeezes it oh so tight
with all her strength and all her might
--just before the old man dies
"i am your lover" she replies

"I've been by your side for 60 years
i've shared your laughter and eased your fears
i gave you water and ceased your tears"
--"and listened to every word you said
washed your clothes, bathed and fed
now i sit beside your bed"

As he slowly turns his head
tears are falling eyes are red
one final look of recognition
as she adjusts his position
that single thought sums up their lives
as they say a final goodbye.

I see ghosts everywhere
but only when my eyes are closed
too long at them I do stare
for it's them I fear the most.

A lingering foreboding
a heightened sixth sense
my confidence eroding
these feelings so intense.

It's time to bury my ghosts
for them to haunt elsewhere
no longer will I be the host
no longer will they scare.

I will exorcise my demons
I will exorcise my fears
now I can start dreaming
no more nightmares.

Real beauty only lasts a while
like a fading sunset
or your smile
like a flower at full bloom
or changing seasons
it's gone too soon.
Such beauty cannot be captured by words
no sound can be uttered not a syllable heard
so I sit in deathly silence
and admire the view
something so timeless
as I look at you.

Like that flower
you stand alone in a field
supported by God's power
to which you yield
I dare not pick you
as you will only wither
so I must wait and watch
whilst you dither.

I'm glad I witnessed
something so beautiful
my life has been blessed
you do not need a mirror
for the only thing that reflects
your beauty is the heavens
something so perfect
I have been in its presence.
Gods own creation
such unknown perfection.

Like the changing season
you pass without reason
no explanation
just fade like our relation.
Please bring back your summer sun
so I can bask in your glow
from heavenwards above
just tell me why you had to go
and leave without my love.
If you are the sun then I am the moon
never to meet and gone too soon.

Although I don't want to see you go
deep down I already know
so I just admire you from afar
like another shooting star
so beautiful in the nights sky
you have my attention
you've caught my eye
I look in your direction
but you fade and die.

This is why I write
for my words to incite
an insatiable passion
a dream that's everlasting
not this life that's fleeting
forever grasping
with every heart that's beating
and every breath taken
from the moment we awaken
for it's worth nothing
without loving
something or someone
with all our energy
with total consistency
but only you will know
what will make your heart grow
what really excites
i'm just here to incite
to create that spark
within your mind and hearts
I paint my words on paper
in order to shape your
destiny.

Now is not the time for hesitancy
the reluctant words that get tied upon our tongue
our voice faltered from when we were young
let no one halt your expressions
even if this is the only lesson
my only poem you ever read
let my creativity feed
into your subconscious
let my words breed
so you too want this
the urge
from my spark it does surge
until you can no longer sit still
from just a thought it becomes real
more than just a chemical reaction
let it become lasting satisfaction
so stand up and take action!

My love flickers like a flame
as it dances in the breeze
it stands out in the rain
and refuses to leave.

My love is stubborn as a rock
it cannot be moved
it cannot be stopped
even though it's been used
just a single drop
can change the world
from being filled with hate
for it's my fuel
that does dictate
my every move
as my hearts been cast
it's lit the fuse
it burns so fast.

My love is a raging fire
that cannot be quenched
an angelic choir
it does not relent
destroying everything in it's path
for it's heaven sent
I know not of it's power
yet I feel it burn
I watch it devour
and try to learn
how to control the beast
that burns within
whilst it feasts
upon my sin.

How do you destroy passion?
how can you control the fire?
for my love is everlasting
my love does not tire.

If you want my advice
follow your heart
and never think twice.
Never give away your love freely
nor hand over your heart so easily
remember it is fragile
so please take time and wait a while
as patience is a virtue
so hold out for the one
and let no one hurt you.

Never let anyone talk you into bed
wait for them to show it's real love
and not just sweet words being said
never let them beneath the sheets
nor waste precious tears on liars and cheats
Even though your heart may seem broken
it's a muscle and over time gets stronger
with every healing word that’s spoken.
Real friends are worth their weight in gold
as they will remain till the end
when you're grey and old.

Never let anyone make you feel inferior
nor cause you to question what's in the mirror
don't listen to their jealousy
for real beauty is more than you can see
it's what's found deep within
and not what's painted on the skin
as that deception fades with age
and all that's left will be an empty cage
where your heart used to rest
a hollow feeling in your chest
if you don't want to pay that price
then please follow my advice.

I keep pushing
I keep wishing
I keep praying
I keep staying strong
as this road called life is long.
Even though I may hit a few potholes
even though I've had a few shot goals
I must endure
I must keep my heart pure
I must settle the score
for this thing called life
it's war!

I could tell you a story
though it may not be true
about pain so gory
of a heart ripped in two.

In legend it is told
a tail thats spun
upon lies was sold
and now its begun.

There was once a man
that gave it all
without a plan
not afraid to fall.

I guess he was naive
as his heart was on display
attached to his sleeve
and on it she did prey.

For he met a girl
or she found him
like a precious pearl
that shined within.

But also without
for he tried to grab it
and she had her doubts
as it was writ...

That never can such a jewel be owned
nor can you claim another's heart
for all beauty is only on loan
till such a time you must part.

It's fear that holds us prisoner
each night and every day
it's fear that roots us to the spot
or makes us run away
it's fear that binds our tongue
when words we want to say
it's fear that clouds our minds
that keeps mankind at bay.

There's nothing to fear but fear itself
how I wish there was something else
to justify the hurt inside
to explain the pain that abides
the very thoughts that repeat and grind
constantly upon my mind
like clouds of acid rain
that slowly drive a man insane
oh death your bitter taste i feign.

We've been circling each other for months
two kindred spirits caught in a death stance
I see your vulnerabilities lined up like dominoes
but don't worry I'm here to slay your foes.
A worm is buried in your system
so deep in your head it affects your wisdom.
I will stand by your side always to protect you
I will never leave, hurt or reject you
I may not be the strongest, fastest or smartest
but for you I will work the longest and hardest
until all our demons are dead and gone
as we stand here all alone
on a desert plain, no sun, moon or rain
just two kindred spirits.

Just another fool
trying to act cool
another street punk
out to steal your junk
he flashes his blade
your fate has been made
plunges in the knife
and there goes your life
another widowed wife.

Hands soaked in blood
just misunderstood
no time to plead insanity
hoping for some humanity.

..and what does he get?
A life for a life?
A knife for a knife?
No!, thirty to life
but still out in five
on the streets to rule
back being the fool
to claim another life.

What have we become?
the same thing that we despised
what happened to when we were young?
how can I now look you in the eyes?

What was right is now wrong
and what was white is now black
yet we still march on
because what we lost we can't get back.

For we exist within the grey area
lost somewhere in between
we've hit the invisible barrier
the place that's never seen.

I now embrace my imperfections
no longer chase the wind
no comfort or protection
for I know that I am sin.

If yesterday was once more
I would not be broke or so poor
but its through life's lessons that I've learned
money spent can always be earned
yet time that passes cannot be returned.

I existed within shadows
that lined my temple halls
surrounded by meadows
divided by walls
in darkness was I
for though there were windows
I could not see the sky
as only my sin glowed
that lit my path
yet I kept my sanity
for I could laugh.

How can you measure morality?
without a ruler
for god commands gravity
and we are fools heirs
lost with our pride
at judgements table
there's no place to hide
no seat for the wicked
no rest for the able.

On his head was a thicket
a crown which was noble
our sins have been washed
our depravity showered
our pride now quashed
and yet empowered
as he does rise
and live again
with clarity's eyes
this poem I pen.

Lost again in my head
need something to take off the edge
since I stopped taking my meds
a different distraction
a new way to get satisfaction
smile at me again
pretend you're more than just a friend
be my muse
so another path I can choose
one where I wasn't set to lose.

Be my guide dog
through my minds fog
my blind slog
up a perilous path
an endless graft
with no sight of summit
but if I don't fight I plummet
into a bottomless pit
so dimly lit
I can barely see
or hardly breathe
for I have paid the cost
now I'm completely lost.

I try to put on a brave face
like that of a mountain
yet even it can be displaced
by a mustard grain of faith.

So why am I still climbing
this imaginary ladder
when I should be flying
upon divine wings.

Trying to reach that untold treasure
within your chest
I lost the map
and never had the key
I forgot the facts
like you forgot me.

When you no longer wanted me
even though you're all I could see
I have to leave
just so that I can breathe
catch my breath
and gather the pieces which are left.

Just because we don't talk
doesn't mean I think of you less
now outlined in chalk
yet I still feel the need to impress
still wait for your reply
yes I want it to work
that's why I still try
even if I feel the hurt
and the pain
I endure it all
because I still feel the same
you can call me a fool
or any other name
just as long as you call
just as long as you remain.

You had me at a smile
no words needed
captured in exile
our eyes met
new course set
instant attraction
impulse reaction
everything else just static
one feeling, ecstatic
heart skipped not a beat
but a whole song sheet
swept off feet.

Your casual dress
no need to impress
as your beauty shines through
what happened to my brain?
i forget my name
David, who??
feels like electricity
running through my body
emotional complexity
still don't know who I be
class A, ecstasy
completely dazzled
brain still frazzled.

We got chemistry
soon to be biology
top of the class
full marks
first shivers
now sparks
extended hand
sweaty palms
nothing planned
subtle charms
hair stands on end
feel so weak
knees bend
i try to speak
voice falter
tongue tied
mouth dry
glass of water
just a mumble
brain fried
feet now stumble
reach for chair
caught off balance
all is air
failed first challenge
goodbye reality
hello gravity
you look away
feeling awkward
please stay
forever altered.

If I were a cloud drifting through space
I would never feel scared or out of place
I would float for days high in the sky
I would never need to question why
the sun would shine bright and I would glow
for all people to see far below
and when the rain came I wouldn't care
as it was tears of joy I tried to share.

Disarm with charm the arms of war
a chance to settle a thousand year score
to save mankind from blood and gore
and live in peace forever more.

My mind clouded with false judgements
my heart out pours in abundance
but no ones here to catch my tears
for no one hears my minds fears
i told them all to you once
but i guess even for you it was too much
for its full of ***** ******
whilst in my bed lies metaphors.

How long must we play this game?
where I get angry and you do the same
pretending that we just don't care
oh what a stupid pair
for what was our crux
from that tree is now plucked
so i cast my mind on new horizons
where upon my thoughts are silent.

Why do you look at me with that grin?
Why do you smile like you know something?
There is an emptiness inside
a pain I cannot hide
a memory I can't displace
that's shown across my face.

Why does everything turn to ****?
You and me we fit
and yet you still can't see it.
All I ask for is a day
to take us far away
from all this bitterness and decay.

No more lies
no more betrayal
no more alibis
no more denial.
So once more we may prevail
and rise again
like a phoenix
or Jesus.

For I am Mars and you Venus
upon the stars as we lie
so beautiful upon the nights sky.
How can any man a love defy?
Or even define?
For I am yours and you are mine.

one hundred children out at play
one hundred names or so they say
one hundred church bells that rang
one hundred voices never sang
one hundred reasons as to why
one hundred planes soared in the sky
one hundred bombs dropped from above
one hundred bodies burst with love
one hundred more upon the ground
one hundred hearts were never found
one hundred people hid instead
one hundred living are still dead
one hundred souls quaked with fear
one hundred ears will not hear
i love you.

We are all grains of sand on a beach
but if we all stand hand in hand we can reach
perfection like glass.
For our affection is all anyone can ask
and if we freely give as well as receive
we all can live in love before we leave.

A fallen angel with outstretched wings
a thousands voices begin to sing
this is the sound of our undying hymn.
Flowers ripped from the stem
babies torn from mothers hem
a restless desire to escape the myre
a lifeless face in this heartless place
devoid of love or god above
the sense of danger at every turn
the fear of life as chances spurn
questions unanswered no time to learn.

A world without truth
beset upon uncouth
lies surround us remain confounded
freedom to leave but always grounded
left astounded
dumbfounded
beached and floundered.

A compass without direction
a heart with no affection
filled with your infection
tasting the infliction
my mirrorless reflection
hate and rejection
no shot at redemption
or chance of exemption
no dream or conception
no allegiance or faction
lifeless action
no anger or reaction
no thought or distraction
no love or satisfaction
a heart unguarded no protection.

Life left unchallenged
decisions in the balance
which path to choose
either way set to lose
the crossroads of life
no wish to survive.

I am just a voice,
a name you can't remember,
an easy choice,
to dismember,
my vital *****,
for I am nothing more than,
a crazed fan,
this unnamed man,
that sits and waits,
for some recognition,
filled with fear and hate,
at his position,
caught in lust,
what love was before,
has turned to rust,
nothing more,
a tainted chalice,
which I still drink from,
our empty palace,
that we built upon,
the ruins of a relationship,
the hands that loosen grip,
that held so tightly,
the soft words spoken nightly,
from my heart outpours,
for this lost cause,
not in action,
more like fiction,
a romantic novel,
buried with a shovel,
in my hearts coffin,
so all thats left is,
fear, failure and nothing.

Heartfelt promises
from loves young novices
secrets told in haste
tears shed that have gone to waste
no smart sensibility
open hearted vulnerability
giving it all away
with these three words that they say
the meaning lost in translation
the heavy cost of this relation
not a notch on the bedpost
but a knot in her throat
pretending to cope
relying on faith and hope
down on bended knee
not in proposition
but to he who sees
for this is our religion
praying to the man upstairs
cameras connect our adjourning stares
the artificial eyes
that glance at the sky
waiting for the rain
praying for a change
in circumstance
so once more they can sing and dance.

Live young
and love strong
for nothing created from the heart is wrong
even if you feel the pain
it proves its real
you're not insane
for every moment suffered in grief
will come a day which brings relief
so don't allow your heart to hesitate
or allow the twists of fate
for its course to dictate
take charge of how you feel
because people will tell you it's not real
they will say give up the fight
that you can't afford to chase the light
but it's that light that keeps us alive
without it we're just dead inside
an empty machine
without love we just sleep not dream
counting down the hours
till we shut down
pushing up flowers
from an earthly mound.

If my heart is my compass,
then you are true north,
the first and the last,
the only set course,
you are also the east,
and the south,
the most and the least,
my home and my house,
the only one to which I invest,
because you also are my west.

For you are the present,
the here and the now,
the reason I don't relent,
the why and the how,
if there was a question,
you would be my answer,
the name that I mention,
as you are simply her.

A generation lost in the storm,
the flowers left by those that mourn,
how could we be so careless,
to loose something so precious,
so many jewels that sparkled,
are now in heavens star pool.

Why they were taken so young we may never know,
all that remains is the afterglow,
a silent memory of those now gone,
another wordless song now sung,
so worthless for those that now live on.

Since time has no more meaning,
as our hearts are left without feeling,
a numbness in our chest,
since those we loved have laid to rest,
gone are all their problems,
they are lost but not forgotten.

If only words were strong enough to heal,
of all the lives that you steal,
the broken dreams of the departed,
the lives of those that were barely started.
If we could stand together and fight,
with all our strength and all our might,
we may reach the promised land,
and finish those dreams that they had planned,
at least we can say that we have tried,
to live our lives for those that died.

How I hunger for the taste of your lips
as we meet in the night like two passing ships
I would lay anchor in your bay
and spend the time to and fray
until your bough breaks
or dawn chorus wakes
then I would be on my way.

With a farewell greeting
for our fateful meeting
as our love like the night was fleeting
remembered only in tale
a sailor's fable
of two passing ships.

All is pain
nothing to lose
nothing to gain
come the sun
or the rain
who cares
for poison
is the only fruit it bares
this bitter life
no joy
just grief
no feelings
so empty
no healing
i'm exempt see
a broken record
spinning round
always lost
never found
my body is here
but my mind elsewhere
a constant nightmare
never knowing if i sleep or wake
if its real or fake
my smile hides the hurt
my skin scarred beneath the shirt
love me for who I was
and not who I am
simply because
i'm no longer a man
just a shell
of who i used to be
a scam
a memory
pain is my only friend
my own worse enemy
and nothing but darkness see.

Your beauty is like a prism,
but all you see is a prison,
trapped in your mind you envision,
a future without relations,
surrounded by temptation,
when all you want is love.

So you bury your feelings,
and hide your emotions,
drowning your demons,
in magical potions,
shying from attention,
avoiding affection,
because you've already been hurt.

Yet I understand you,
for I wore the same shoes,
which is why I still fight,
trying to restore new,
so others can adore too,
your prism of light.