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The silence is deafening, quickening,
my heart beating, rasping,
my breaths heavy,
my tears trickling,
he lurks in shadows, fears,
my head spinning, dizzy,
my eyes blurring,
my world disappears
 Jan 2017 the lost girl
Cedric
There's beauty in uncertainties,
Without an explanation from any antiquities,
As I cross this river bank,
Without a boat I just sank,
Drowning in a sea of fallacies.

As I struggle and asphyxiate,
In this sea of multiple colors,
I gently resurfaced with a breath of air,
Only to succumb to my own dolor,
Lacking in strength to alleviate.

I open my eyes after the anguish,
Deny as I may, I'll only fall!
From this building up high, I call!
Come what may I'll face it here!
In my dreams of endless skyscrapers.

I write such nonsensical gibberish,
Expressing my vague thoughts in a poem.
The way I write is thuggish and sluggish,
Wishing what may ever be solemn,
In my ever so changing peculiarities.
A poem of uncertainty, just because.
Lines Laid Down By Others

Days of measles spent cloaked in darkness
Veil of curtains and dime store sunglasses  
Between me and a sun gone cold with evil intent

Hell bent on robbing me of sight while I was busy
Looking inward tallying up the wages of sin
Bedeviled by an itch that needed scratching

Hands sheathed in white tube sock condoms  
To ward off nails rendered, I’d been warned, poison
As the fer-de-lance snake that glared back from the jungle

Overlay in the World Book Encyclopedia
Slammed shut for the sanctuary of a coloring book
Prophylactics and perpetual twilight incompatible

With proper grip and waltz of a crayon
To stay inside lines laid down by others
Alone in the dark with nothing left to lose

But Roy Orbison shades and a pit viper
Coiled, biding time pressed between pages
Made as much sense as a malevolent sun.
I've made mistakes,
More than I care to remember,

I'm the only one
That I can blame,
I began making them
The year that I was born--43 years ago
In December.

My intentions,
Where always, to do good,
But somehow it always backfired,

Someone always got hurt -
Usually me!
I think it's the way
That I was built and wired.

God knows how hard I always tried,
But I never could get it right,

Selfish people's darkness
would always drown my sunshine
and steal my daylight.

I never wanted to hurt a soul,
But I only had two choices:
Make someone else happy--and be miserable!

Or,

Make choices,
So that I may be happy--and become invisible!

I was never a bad person - On the contrary,
I was too good!

The biggest mistake I ever made,
Was not doing what I wanted -
What I knew, I should.

The moral of this little story
Is quite simple to understand...

Be a kind, good-natured human,
But don't live your life on demand!

I would love to say
That I have no regrets,

But I can't lie to anyone,
Or to myself;
You see, my heart...
It never, ever, forgets.

~ I'm slowly learning how to forgive myself
for not getting everything right,

I've had help from my precious children,
And from my man...
'Cause, having them, means...
That I got the most important part right!

By Lady R.F ©2016
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